Everything happens as it should?

[InvisibleTouch]

So last night I reconciled with an old friend whom I hadn't spoken to in 6 years. It turns out that the issue I'd been so angry with him about, had a very positive outcome, whereas my desired outcome at the time wouldn't have been nearly so beneficial. I've known this for a while, but yesterday finally worked up the nerve to tell him. I still wish he'd been more straightforward with me at the time, but so it goes. And it makes me wonder....

I've generally been of the mindset that there's no "reason" for things to happen as they do. Things just happen, good or bad. When someone asks "Why?" or "Why me?" in the face of a tragedy, I could only answer, "There is no 'why.' It's not a punishment, and it's not a 'grand plan' by some mythical deity. It just IS." I still don't believe in the mythical deity, but I do believe there's a manner of consciousness and pervading intelligence throughout the Universe, and I'm starting to see how "negative" events can sometimes have positive outcomes - maybe not positive in terms of "happy," but in terms of setting something into motion that was necessary in the long term. Now, you say that to someone who's just experienced a personal tragedy, and they'll be furious with you. I've had my share of personal tragedies, and I would have been furious too if someone had said it to me at the time. Now, looking back - I'm not so sure. Things did fall into place in ways that wouldn't have happened, but for those terrible events. There's a kind of peace in that concept. Maybe I can remember to remind myself, in the midst of chaos and unpleasantry, that maybe this is happening exactly as it should - and since I don't know the long-term outcome yet, I can't judge it as completely negative.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. I'm not entirely convinced that things happen as they should...

I agree with your earlier statement, that things just happen...

The rest of it...We put a spin on it to have some control over what is essentially uncontrollable...

We do hate not knowing, and not having control...

We need to ride out the misadventures (and even the good adventures) as best we can...

That's my take on it, anyhow...

:shrug:


:hi:

[Ariana Celeste]

2. I've had a lot of talks with Oedi about this kind of thing

I wouldn't go so far as to say that everything happens for a reason, or anything like that. But...

I believe you can take any negative and form some sort of positive out of it. You can't change the past or undo it but you can use it to move yourself forward. I'm far from an optimist and I'm a fairly negative person in general... so this isn't just happy go lucky thinking on my part.

When I was arrested awhile back, I thought my life was over. I was an over dramatic mess. All I could see in the mirror was failure. I was convicted on one charge and placed on probation. And honestly, it's become a good thing for me in a lot of ways. It's still rough... I have trouble finding work and I had to sign away some rights, I'm branded as a felon and many people see things in black & white... so in their eyes I'm on the same level as the guy on the corner convicted of assault charges, regardless of the fact my crime was victimless. (I had some psychedelic mushrooms in my home.)

Through the probation though I've been forced to actually do something with myself. Before the arrest I was going nowhere. Now I have a GED and I'm actively looking for work, I'm actually considering going back to school, I've come back to my family and have been able to watch my nephew grow. Through doing community service for the state, I've been able to see firsthand how it feels to really do something for the community, rather than just thinking about volunteering 'someday'. Even my couple of days in county jail gave me something positive to walk away with. At least in the way that it kind of opened my mind. I've become a better person for it.

[CBHagman]

3. Your posting (and the thread) are synchronistic for me.

The last day or so I've been thinking again about how a particular overtly bad event in my life (I'll skip elaboration for the time being) caused me to make some positive changes in my life and that, in a way, I am grateful for the trouble because of the nudge it provided and the good people it introduced me to.

I've known a quite a few people who believe in some variation on fate and/or divine intention, whereas I believe in divine powers but human free will -- and that life on this Earth is terribly unfair, sometimes even senseless.

But it does seem the wisest course of action to search for meaning, cultivate a positive attitude, and limit your exposure to people who drag your spirits down. Sometimes I turn off the news for that very reason!

All the best to you.