Funny thing happened on the way to work today

[Tommy_Carcetti]

So I'm driving to work today. And knowing me and my weaknesses, I'm hankering for my twice to thrice weekly tall non-fat vanilla latte from my usual and customary Starbucks.

So as I approach the shopping center with my Starbucks, I do the polite driver thing--turn on my blinker and pull into the turning lane to go into the shopping center. All of a sudden, some jerk in a white SUV in the right thru lane decides to swerve into the turning lane right in front of me without signaling or anything.

I think its rude, but as I turn into the shopping center, I hope for his sake that he was just low on gas and saw the gas station next to the shopping center and wanted to make a quick stop, and that was the reason for his quick swerve.

Nope. He continues in front of me and turns into the shopping center himself.

So I think to myself, this a-hole better not be going to Starbucks. He better stop off at a store before Starbucks.

But nope, he keeps on driving and driving. Until he gets to a parking space. Right in front of Starbucks.

The parking space I should have gotten had he not cut me off.

At this point, I'm stewing. I scramble to find the nearest parking space, and it is a race to turn off my car, unbuckle my seatbelt, and tear out of the car. I keep a close eye on Mr. White SUV and notice he is a little slow to get out.

I can still beat this bastard!

I start a very brisk walk, almost jog, towards the Starbucks, always keeping an eye on Mr. White SUV, who is now out of his car and slowly walking towards the Starbucks door. He's closer, but I'm closing the gap rapidly.

I keep on closing the gap, closing the gap, and just as he approaches the door, I jet in front of him and get into the store myself, first.

And then I look at the line. About a dozen people in line, a half dozen people waiting for their drinks. I've got to get to work, and I still haven't gotten on the expressway and who knows what traffic will be like.

Mr. White SUV also sees the long line.

He slowly turns around and walks out the door, dejected.

I then follow, and we both take long walks back to our respective cars in bitter defeat, our unspoken race all for nothing.