Mariah Carey: "You have to stay pretty...having children would leave me feeling violated"

[Amerigo Vespucci]

Mariah Carey rules out having kids

By HOWARD KISSEL
DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER

Tuesday, April 22nd 2008, 7:39 PM



The proverbial clock may be ticking, but Mariah Carey has turned off the alarm.

Her 40th birthday is approaching, but Carey told a reporter that she has no desire to have children. "It's hard to have kids in this world," she told the British version of OK! Magazine. "I don't think I could properly educate a child right now. Maybe in the future, but I actually haven't thought about it."

Carey said having children would leave her feeling "violated... I know that's a kind of weird thing to say, but that's how I am.

"For now I enjoy my dog Jack's company. It's definitely because of childhood traumatic stuff. The whole not wanting to have a baby as a baby."

Carey, who is in London to promote a new album, admits she spends a lot of time babying herself. She arrived with an entourage of 15 hairdressers, bodyguards and personal stylists and commandeered every penthouse suite in Claridge's, an exclusive Mayfair hotel. Carey, who admitted to insuring her legs for $2 million, also had a $20,000 personal gym installed in her own penthouse at Claridge's.

"You gotta take care of yourself," she said. "You have to try and stay pretty, you know."

http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2008/04/22/2008-04-22_mariah_carey_rules_out_having_kids.html

[hobbit709]

1. Pretty on the outside

Vain and not so good on the inside.

[Deep13]

5. Why do you say that?

Just wondering.

[IronLionZion]

15. Same thing with my girlfriend and I

we must be vain and not so good on the inside. :eyes:

god damn motherfucking liberals

[LynneSin]

59. Wow, didn't know I was 'Vain and not so good on the inside"

I better get popping out kids if I want to be pretty on the outside

:eyes:

[El Fuego]

72. Yeah, it's her duty as a woman to pop out the kids, she's just an incubator after all.

God forbid a woman makes a CHOICE about her own life. :eyes: How selfish of her not to reproduce.

[Rabrrrrrr]

2. If only all people were as wise as her, to know they don't want kids,

and to not bow to social pressure to pop them out willy nilly.

I'm not a Mariah fan, and there's a part of me that is glad she won't procreate because one thing the world doesn't need is another talentless hack, but I applaud her for her honesty here, and for knowing that she doesn't want a child, and thus not having one.

Would that everyone were so wise.

[IronLionZion]

16. Hehe, yes I prefer this to the Britney and Jamie Lynn Spears route. nt

[Kitty Herder]

51. I agree. All of my friends from high school got married by the time they were twenty and have

four or more kids. They never had a chance to decide whether they really wanted them or not. One of them had decided she did NOT want any kids. Unfortunately, she fell in love with a return-Mormon missionary at the age of nineteen and married him after three months. He wanted ten kids. They settled on four. But she's miserable. There are some considerations when getting married that should override being in love as a factor.

[Boudica the Lyoness]

3. She's got good sense

At least she knows she shouldn't breed. What a stuck up ugly person though!

[ceile]

4. At least she's honest.

I guess I can give her that much.

[mainegreen]

6. Good. Her vast wealth wont become generational. n/t

[Dulcinea]

7. Sounds like she made the right decision.

Anyone that self-absorbed should definitely not reproduce.

[huskerlaw]

8. Good.

Her attitude is far preferable to those who have children merely for the status symbol and then leave them to be raised by nannies.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

9. Anyone as shallow as she is...

Should not be having babies...

[Dangerously Amused]

10. Kudos to her for not bringing children into the world

...when she knows she is not parenting material. She is demonstrating profound maturity and wisdom - on this issue - as compared to those who bring children into the world for all the wrong reasons. And there are many, many of them.

[sasquatch]

12. Exactly!!

I hate all of these jackasses having kids that they don't want or have the needs to take care for.

[Dangerously Amused]

13. No kidding. If it were up to me, people would have to pass a basic competency exam,

...and get a license to have kids. I mean, you have to do all that to drive a car, to practice a basic profession... you even need a license to pour a beer in public. But the most important decision people will ever make - whether or not to have children - is a free-for-all. I think some people sit down and put more thought into whether or not they can finance a new car than into whether and how well they can manage raising a child.

[tigereye]

75. that's what my mom always used to say -

you need a license to drive but not to have kids... at least a basic parenting course before hand would be good.

[DarkTirade]

27. It takes a certain level of maturity to admit that you don't have enough for something important.

Not, y'know, a WHOLE lot, but a certain level. :)

[Lorien]

40. Are you saying that it's important that everyone have children? n/t

[DarkTirade]

44. ... wha?

... so if I said that rainforests are important, that would imply that everyone should have one? :silly:

[Rabrrrrrr]

48. You parsed and comprehended dark tirade's post about as well as you did swag's.

Which is to say, not at all.

:wtf:

[Mad_Dem_X]

58. Exactly. n/t

[MonkeyFunk]

11. good for her

I can't stand her, but I admire for knowing what she wants and not fucking up another life.

[Deja Q]

14. For the wrong reasons, perhaps, but she's doing the right thing.

Besides, such vanity -- think of the children. Ironically, she isn't.

Funny how most of her comments revolve around looks, except for the one bit about 'childhood traumatic stuff'. I didn't read the whole article, but if it's all about being pretty...

[snooper2]

17. poor confused girl...

you were violated when that old man stuck his .......

:rofl:

[Zuiderelle]

66. wow, that's a nasty thing to say

[I Have A Dream]

68. I'm assuming that you mean an ex-husband rather than something else. nt

[RainDog]

18. that headline is yellow journalism at its worst!!

I am not a fan of her style of music, but the comment about staying pretty had to do with installing an expensive gym. If you (generic you, not AV you) think a woman in her position does not get criticized MERCILESSLY about her appearance... then you must not have been in the U.S. for, oh, the last 40 years...

when she did gain weight she was constantly picked over by press and fan vultures. this happens to women ALL THE TIME. so, that's just a reality.

the part about having children, as she noted, had to do with some childhood trauma issues. this has NOTHING to do with her attempts to try to "stay pretty." More than a few women have childhood issues they deal with when they become parents themselves... she recognizes this.

Since when is it a measure of a human's goodness if they have children or not, anyway? I thought clergy were respected when they did not reproduce and instead devoted themselves to their careers.

Women are constantly "ranked" in value based upon whether they are young enough, thin enough, hot enough, fuckable enough... based upon those criteria, I guess I should just stick my head in the oven and be done with it. /rant.

[Kitty Herder]

52. I agree. The headline was completely misleading about what she actually said. nt

[Puzzle]

61. BRAVO

I have been lurking for a long time and don't remember if I've even posted before... but this thread made me so mad I'm posting now!

Bravo for the best post on the subject. No one has the right to judge her for feeling how she feels - it affects only her and she is not hurting anyone.

Does anyone see the irony of the "Danica.... sigggggghhhhhh" thread going on around the same time as this one? People on DU judge others by their looks all the time, even commenting on weight gains (see the James Spader threads....). Yes, celebrities are more fair game because they put themselves out there, but they are still people and the double standard in this thread makes me sick.

Edited to add: Also, with all the MSM bashing that goes on here, did no one consider that she may have been misquoted? Having dealt with the media, I know this happens all the time. Anyone basing their opinion of her on one article should step back and think.

[RainDog]

81. welcome to DU!

--posting, that is. looks like that was your first one.

I saw but never read the danica thread... not a race fan. but, yes, the ways that physical appearance are dealt with here and everywhere else do not make any sense. Obviously we all find ppl attractive or not, but if we don't like ppl, the easiest way to insult is via appearance.

that has really bothered me here regarding HRC, even tho I don't support her. It has no place here, and shouldn't matter anywhere that a female is involved in pols.

As I noted in this thread before... I've REALLY noticed a lot of totally and purposefully misleading headlines in the media lately. Not to say it's new, it's just that I've happened to note them.

[bigwillq]

19. Good for her.

At least she knows she doesn't want kids. People should respect that and stop calling her names, like those who have already on this thread.

I don't want kids. Does that make me vain and shallow? :shrug:

[Deja Q]

21. No, but do you go around saying or suggesting if you had kids, you'd end up ugly?

That is the point, and the difference.

I'll agree, she doesn't want kids. That's great. But as she'd rather stand in front of a mirror 10 hours a day just to look like *that*, she'll be in for a nasty shock at some point down the road, when even 24 hours of preening in front of a mirror won't be sufficient. :(

[RainDog]

22. That is NOT what she said!

re-read the post. two diff. subjects.

I've noticed lately (and I'm sure it's not just been lately) that headlines, esp. from British press, are HORRIBLY misleading. flowers are losing their scents, headline said. research said pollution is interfering with the transmission of scent molecules so that bees have to be closer by to smell a flower. that sort of thing. this is another one of them.

[petronius]

30. I noticed that - the "pretty" sounded like it was tongue-in-cheek, and was clearly

unrelated to the baby part. Of course, a headline of "Mariah Carey chooses not to have children at this time for perfectly normal reasons, and it's not really any of our business anyway" wouldn't get nearly as many clicks...

[Lorien]

39. Yep, and to be prefectly honest, even if it was a flippant, tongue in cheek

statement, it's true in her business. Beauty and fitness is a requirement for any pop singer, and birth is hell on any body (but particularly harsh on one that's already hit 40).There are already six billion "miracles" on the planet. If she chooses her career over motherhood I say more power to her!

[petronius]

45. I completely agree - even if she had said what the writer made it sound like,

she'd be making a rational decision based on her own needs...

[bigwillq]

23. Some people are like that.

I could care less what she does. I don't know why people have to resort to name calling. They just shouldn't care.

She's always been a diva. That's just who she is.

[Lorien]

37. Imho that makes you selfless

Society puts pressure on everyone-and women in particular-to reproduce. Why should ANYONE want to do it these days? America is crumbling and the planet, at BEST, has 40 livable years left for the human race. Spend 30 minutes in the environment and energy forum and you'll realize that bringing a child into this world at this point is condemning the poor soul to a hellish future existence. I would have loved to have been a mother myself, but the idea now seems far to cruel to me. I certainly would have had to have stopped reading the news years ago had I been a mother. :-(

[Iris]

85. at least she didn't talk about "all the flies and stuff"

[Shine]

20. No offense, but she strikes me as incredibly self-absorbed and immature

and NOT just because she doesn't want to have kids. I've read interviews of hers and that's how she comes across to me: incredibly selfish, but yet lacking self-esteem.

It's probably a good thing she continues to focus on her singing, her dog and how she looks. Keep it simple.

[NNadir]

34. It would seem that she knows who she is.

This is a damn sight better than much of the world.

Sting, who advertises himself has an "environmentalist" has competed with flies for breeding capacity.

Undoubtedly his children have learned how to consume like their old man.

It would not surprise me to find out that the Sting family has the energy consumption of several small African nations.

Sting's vocal range isn't as good as Ms. Carey's either.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

24. at least she knows herself well enough... I am glad to know that

she has that much insight about herself.

[Ellen Forradalom]

25. There's no obligation to have kids

It's strange that her lack of interest in starting a family should even be a news item.

[lizerdbits]

28. Didn't you know?

Any woman who doesn't want kids is a freak. Usually we are all selfish too, and will be crying our eyes out in 20-30 years for not having any. :eyes:

(Eye roll not directed at you :) )

[Fox Mulder]

26. I'm glad for her.

I personally find it unethical to bring a child into this world.

[Orsino]

29. Yeah, parenting isn't for everyone--and shouldn't be.

And when you get right down to it, looking pretty is half of Carey's job, at least. If she feels that she couldn't keep that up while mothering, well, that's (at least) one fewer celebrity child in rehab twenty years from now.

[hunter]

31. The kids she won't have are damned lucky not to have her as a mom!

:silly:

[Starbucks Anarchist]

32. My ears are violated when I hear her music.

[Generator]

33. She's correct

It's hell on the whoo ha. Some women never regain bladder control, among other things. I had a Cesarean (and will refuse to answers questions about my whoo ha-except to say no nine pound life made it through and I guess it wasn't meant to thank someone for modern medicine) -now there is fat pocket that never goes away-but she could have the surgically removed.

Oh and thankfully one less narcissist pop star is forcing her spawn on the world. Some unborn spawn is thankful.

[swag]

35. I applaud her: her carbon footprint dies when she does.

Add a host of other benefits to the planet and the inhabitants thereof of a human not reproducing.

Plus, she spares a sentient being the extreme incovenience of existence.

Also, her boobs look good in that one video where she's washing the car and Snoop is just kind of nodding his head.

[Lorien]

42. So there's a "sentient being" out there who is just waiting to be born

and she's denying it birth??

There are millions of mothers on the planet who felt pressured into motherhood, and their children are the ones who suffer for it. I'm glad that someone-ANYONE- is willing to say "no, motherhood isn't for me". Six billion "miracles" are already taxing the planet into a meltdown.

[swag]

43. Amen.

I'm glad I got a vasectomy 22 years ago.

[Rabrrrrrr]

47. Your question makes no sense at all, given the statements swag made.

Ah, the ol' ignoratio elenchi.

:wtf:

:shrug:

[Zuiderelle]

67. reading comprehension

D-

[madeline_con]

36. So she doesn't want kids, but....

it's beacuse she thinks they'll ruin her goddess like appearance? :puke:

Definitely wouldn't make much of a mom anyway.

[Karenina]

60. NO and had you read the fluff with COMPREHENSION

her feelings about bearing children are related to childhood trauma.
:eyes: Good grief! Why are so many bashing this woman? :shrug:

[Rabrrrrrr]

62. Most of the population is entirely invested in the fiction that having children is a requirement,

and that anyone who doesn't want children, no matter their reason, is an ugly, selfish, vain, piece of shit.

[EstimatedProphet]

70. Because of the "You have to stay pretty" comment

The fact is, it is a presumption for her to talk about herself as being pretty. It can come across as being arrogant. I may think she's pretty, you may think she's pretty, but for her to talk about it sounds like she is self-absorbed, whether or not she is. It seems doubly so for her to say that she doesn't want to have children because she wants to be pretty.

Beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder, but it seems like far too many people think it is an objective standard, and being a different shape or having a different look disqualifies someone from looking attractive. Celebrities in particular seem to buy into this, maybe because they become isolated from everyday people. If people would simply remember that being attractive comes from being at peace with yourself first and foremost, they'd all be happier.

[Karenina]

80. Staying "pretty" is part of her JOB as a pop icon

just as it is for models, talking heads and trophy wives... It's no secret and as I read the comment I perceived her tongue firmly implanted in her cheek.

"It seems doubly so for her to say that she doesn't want to have children because she wants to be pretty."

The HEADLINE connected those two blurbs, NOT Mariah. But if you get off on bashing her, do enjoy yourself.

[EstimatedProphet]

82. Uh, I'm not bashing her

I'm stating why it is some people might read it in that light. I somehow thought you'd like an answer to your question.

[Karenina]

83. Sorry, EP. I should have left this thread alone.

People are bashing her for their own reasons, having not even bothered to read the cotton candy in context. Unfortunately this occurs much too often on far more important issues. :hide:

[EstimatedProphet]

86. Too true

[dolo amber]

38. It's true, you know

:thumbsup:

[Cannikin]

41. I think more entertainers should take that route. The planet is too crowded.

[Withywindle]

46. Besides, when she dies she'll just download into a new body anyway. n/t

[EstimatedProphet]

71. HA!

[WildEyedLiberal]

74. HAHA best comment of the whole thread

:thumbsup:

[Cannikin]

76. LMAO

[tigereye]

77. ah

:rofl:

good one, WW!

[GoddessOfGuinness]

49. Well, speaking as one whose childbirths have made her un-pretty

I really appreciate her viewpoint. :eyes:

I'm glad that she's happy without having kids. I believe firmly that motherhood is not for everyone.

It's also really great to know that her vapid viewpoint won't be passed along to any offspring to agonize over.

[baby_mouse]

50. Why is she miming a snail with her right arm?

Loads of poeple do this snail thing all the time. Why?

[u4ic]

53. Think of what those rugrats would do to her beautiful mind n/t

[DFW]

54. I've got news for Mariah Carey

You can have children, stay pretty, and not be violated all at the same time.

The woman in this photo was 46 when it was taken. Her two daughters were 15 and
13 at the time. She was not violated. She is still pretty. Better yet, she wakes
up next to me every morning :-)

[underpants]

55. Mmmmmmm Mariah

:P

[stuntcat]

56. I like her more now.

I respect this. And not every woman craves babies just because she can make them.

[Mad_Dem_X]

57. I'm not a fan of hers, but

I say good for her. I, too, am content to be child-free.

[azmouse]

63. I applaud her for exercising her choice to not have children.

And I'm amazed at how many people here are critical of her choice.
She didn't slam anyone for having children. Why are those with children slamming her?

[Karenina]

84. Misery loves company?

:evilgrin::hide::evilgrin:

[mike_c]

64. good for Mariah....

The Earth's biggest problem is too many humans. ANYONE who forgoes breeding does the world a favor.

[Zuiderelle]

65. I think it's great that she's honest about it, and won't have babies just to have them.

[Maestro]

69. Meh, if she doesn't want children that is fine by me.

I chose to have them with my wife and I have never regretted it nor has she. However, I would love to be able a install a $20,000 gym in an hotel I stay it just keep myself pretty. ;)

[El Fuego]

73. "You have to try and stay pretty..." - more about our society than her vanity IMO

If you're a huge star, it's a given that your looks are your career. But even people in ordinary careers, both men and women, find that they have to "stay pretty" just as a strategic career move. Let yourself go, and you might find yourself out of a job!

This is what our society has become. It's more accurate to say our society as a whole is shallow. So don't blame Mariah, she's just another "Roman."

[Kitty Herder]

78. I agree. Our society judges women harshly on our looks and our looks alone, as if that's

all there is to us. How much more so for someone in her career?

That said, I think she is vain. She insured her legs, fer Gawd's sake. And I don't like her music. :puke:

[HuffleClaw]

79. good for her!

though i'd prefer it if she were a cat person.



dogs drool.