Sorry DU... I'm Still In A Bad Place

[SPKrazy]

my head is better, but my heart is not...

I realize that I let someone into my heart and on the way out they shredded it. I also realize that I never got to their heart, that I got in their head, but not to their heart.

So I'm sad, and hurting, and feeling self pity, and just so there are no questions

THIS IS NOT A THINLY VEILED THREAD!!!! This is an I feel shitty thread, and I feel that way because it hurts to get your ass dumped.

I'll be better tomorrow.

Or the next day.

I also am missing my son, who happens to be in the paradise that I spent with this person who dumped me, this week. He is having a blast. Hunting sea shells. Going out in the Gulf. He's having a blast.

It is making me a little sad that he is there of all places in the week that this has happened. Oh well, I now know that I am better off, just like my therapist told me I would be.

Hell, more than half the people I talk to said that. So why do I let myself hurt, and want to stay?

:hi:

Just moving on...

[Gormy Cuss]

1. Why do you let it hurt? Because you're human, SPK.

And a damn fine human at that, even if your middle name could be IBTL.;-)
:hug:

[SPKrazy]

2. hmmm.... human.... hadn't considered that :P

good point

S IBTL P K

:hug:

[TZ]

3. So sorry SPK

Seems to be too much of this right now...:hug:

[SPKrazy]

4. Meh, I Will Survive

I don't have the stomach for it anymore anyway

:hug:

[BeachBaby]

5. Hey sweetie.

Hope you're okay.

As for moving on.....I'm not sure how to do that. I mean, my head is saying one thing, and my heart is saying something totally opposite.

Kinda like that statement by Sally Field in "Steel Magnolias"......"My head knows that he's gone. I just wish someone could explain it to my heart". :cry:

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

PM me if you need anything.

[SPKrazy]

10. thanks you

:hug: :hug: :hug:

I think I understand what you are saying

but I also have had a lot of good talks tonight with friends and I have come to some solid conclusions that my heart just needs a bit of time to "hear"

:hug:

back at ya

[TK421]

6. Check your PM in about five minutes or so....you need to hear something

seriously....its about time

[SPKrazy]

11. Read it and

will reply shortly

[Danger Mouse]

7. The hell with her.

Seriously.
That's your best bet.

[SPKrazy]

12. I think you are right

:toast:

[Danger Mouse]

15. You KNOW I'm right.

A woman who hurts you that bad was never worth it in the first place.

[SPKrazy]

16. okay

I know you are right :P

[femmocrat]

8. So sorry, SPK.....

I was hoping you were starting to do better. One step at a time, one day at a time..... It just takes time. Eventually, things will improve... although I know that isn't much consolation right now.

You have a lot of friends here who care about you. You can pour your heart out to us anytime, you know that!

:hug: :grouphug: :loveya:

[SPKrazy]

13. I know you are right

and i think it is getting better, my head is wrapping itself around this, my heart is slowly realizing that it isn't totally sliced up

:hug:

:loveya:

[SoxFan]

9. SPK, let me tell you something

There are very few things in life that a beer and a ballgame can't help, at least in some small way.

If you're ever near Manchester, I'll spring for the Fisher Cat tickets and a round at Raxx or the Rover.

Be strong, friend...

[SPKrazy]

14. I'll hold ya to it when i make my way up the New England Coast one of these days

:D

:hi:

thanks!

[MichiganVote]

17. Cuz' you're more familiar with feeling of hurt than anger?

[SPKrazy]

18. mebbe so

something to think about

thanks

:hi:

[Inchworm]

19. I'm 3/4 winded drunk atm.. but

I love ya!~

fuck it, if you can'y love and lose... who are you?

I'd druther just stomp yer head than to see you pityin yourself.

prooly don't hear it much but damn screw that person who rips your soul out every time you see her. She or He.. might just be evil... and fuck evil ppls...

I aint goin back to read this but I love ya SPK...

hi!

:hi:

[siligut]

28. `

:loveya:

[SPKrazy]

32. love ya too inchy

:hug:

[Drum]

20. I hear ya,

& know how it can feel when everything comes down at one time. Hang in there bud... :hug:

[SPKrazy]

33. thanks man

:hug:

[orleans]

21. sorry. n/t

[SPKrazy]

34. thanks

I've made some forward progress today! :woohoo:

[libodem]

22. Sorry

unrequited love sux. Why is love so complicated? If you didn't care so much it wouldn't hurt so much. You must have really cared. Seems it is proportional to the loss. I've been in a long distance, long term relationship for over ten years. I was so infatuated with this guy and craved being with him so much my chest wall felt like it was caving in. Once I started to fall for him I couldn't stop the momentum. Intellectually I knew it was foolish. I loved him and missed him endlessly. He fit the bill so perfectly for my mental image of a partner. No one else could live up to the standard. I still love him. It's like loving someone who is dead. I didn't mean to make this about me and I meant to be empathetic. You aren't alone in this love thing, friend. Be strong. It gets better, day by day.

[SPKrazy]

35. Wow, I Get That Too Much

:hug: :hug: to you

[Callalily]

23. I'm so sorry to hear that

you are still hurting, but as stated above, your heart takes time to heal.

Take care . . . :hug:

[SPKrazy]

36. Yes, gonna give myself some time

and stop posting about her after this :D

:hug:

[NJmaverick]

24. ...

:pals: :hug:

[SPKrazy]

37. thanks d00d

:hug:

[easttexaslefty]

25. I'm sorry you're hurting

:hug:

[SPKrazy]

38. Thanks ETL

:hug:

:hi: neighbor

[Symarip]

26. I'm going through a similar situation

I messed with fire for a few weeks and now I'm burned. My feelings were completely one sided and unreciprocated. Which means I could only get mad at myself for allowing such a situation to occur in the first place.

Hang in there, man. Moving on means there's movement, however slow the movement may be.

[SPKrazy]

39. I had thought my feelings were reciprocated

and the other person insisted they were

:shrug:

movin' on though

[Rhiannon12866]

27. I am so sorry, my friend.

And I do understand. I'm in pretty much of a bad place, too, just now. I've been kind of a mess, and nothing I try to do seems to make much difference. But you sound as if you're handling this as well as you could be expected to. And your son will be back and excited to see you. He'll want to tell you about his adventures. I am doing the same thing, because I believe things will get better eventually. They have before. And there is a comfort in inertia, since we all hate change. Your therapist would probably tell you that, too.

Hang in there, my friend. You're getting better, one day at a time...:hi:

Rhiannon:hug:

[SPKrazy]

40. The only person who likes change

is a wet baby

thanks Rhiannon

:hug: :hug:

[Rhiannon12866]

45. Good quote, and you're right, my friend.

My parents always made it a point to say that I had a problem with change, as a small child. What else did they expect from me? :crazy: Anyway, I understand where you are, my friend, and it sounds to me like you're coping, and pretty well. Please know I'm thinking of you, and sympathizing... :hi: I have two dogs who need care, so I continue to get out of bed...:shrug:

Rhiannon:hug:

[Parche]

29. Hey

Things work out, they always do
keep your chin up

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hi:

[SPKrazy]

41. My chin is up and out today!

:hug: :hug:

:hi:

thanks

[EnviroBat]

30. Southpaw,,, listen to this.

It'll help you get "it" out... Then, quietly, move on..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRstRGetBgs

[SPKrazy]

42. Thanks man

:hi:

[EnviroBat]

47. No problem bro.

Sometimes, tunes are the only way I can get to my emotions anymore...
:hi:

[applegrove]

31. Better to have loved & lost than to never have loved at all.

[SPKrazy]

43. Yeah, so they say

loved and lost, lost at love, :hug:

[SPKrazy]

44. In a much better place today

putting myself first

just a better frame of mind

moving on, not dwelling, allowing my feelings to be, talking to good friends here, letting go (with claw marks no doubt)

I'm feeling free at the moment

:hi:

Thanks everyone for all the support

:grouphug:

[Heidi]

46. Good news!

:hug: :hug:

[Rhiannon12866]

48. I second the "good news," my friend!

Here's to each day being better than the one before it!:toast:

Rhiannon:grouphug: