oh, jesus wept.

[ulysses]

Hot water tank is leaking. Fucking fuckitty fuck.

[DS1]

1. You call your water tank Jesus?

Can it make wine come out your tap?



(sorry)


Good luck!

[ulysses]

2. if I claim to see Jesus' face in the mold patches in the basement,

can I charge enough in admission to pay for repairs?

[DS1]

3. also, make everyone wear respectable long pants

so they help soak up the water and take it home.

Or sell bottled Jesus water souvenirs

[ulysses]

4. "Behold, I give you the very sandals of Christ!"

"Aren't those sponges with masking tape around them?"

"Shut up, you, and put the damned things on. Now, shuffle around over here and look transfixed."