Do you love easily?

[Lyric]

Just curious. I love very easily. And I'm not apprehensive about saying so.

You?

[Faygo Kid]

1. Sinatra: "I Fall In Love Too Easily"

Thanks for the reminder of a beautiful song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HRzACBjaeY8

And yes, of course. Always remember this from "Moonstruck," because no matter how old you get, it's always true:

Ronny Cammareri: Loretta, I love you. Not like they told you love is, and I didn't know this either, but love don't make things nice - it ruins everything. It breaks your heart. It makes things a mess. We aren't here to make things perfect. The snowflakes are perfect. The stars are perfect. Not us. Not us! We are here to ruin ourselves and to break our hearts and love the wrong people and die. The storybooks are bullshit. Now I want you to come upstairs with me and get in my bed!

[lost-in-nj]

2. yes I do

and sometimes it can bring a lot of heartbreak....

but others, joy

:hi:


lost

[YellowRubberDuckie]

3. I do.

And it really disappoints me when I find that I don't like someone. I'm not sure if you're talking about platonic love or being IN LOVE, but I try to love everyone. :shrug:
Duckie

[Lyric]

5. I'm talking about both.

Just...love. I am the kind of person who gives their heart away gladly, and without reservation.

[lost-in-nj]

13. We already knew this about you

:hug:



lost

[The Straight Story]

4. Just my wife

;)

[Faygo Kid]

9. How is she doing?

Didn't you report on her health recently? Hope you and yours are well.

[The Straight Story]

12. Better, she had some heart problems a few weeks back

Still sick off and on but not as bad thankfully!

[Oeditpus Rex]

6. I become infatuated easily

But, love? The Real Thing? No, that doesn't come easily at all.

[SOteric]

7. Nope.

I'm complicated and I come with a metric fuckton of emotional baggage. DS1 is a saint.

[Callalily]

8. Very interesting question.

And I think my response is yes. Not always reciprocated or for that matter appreciated, but that's okay.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

10. My dear oktoberain!

Not just yes, but HELL yes!

I've given my heart away numerous times, and though it can hurt, it can also bring unspeakable joy...

:hug:

[Lyric]

11. I agree wholeheartedly.

I'm not the least bit afraid of loving.

It's hurt me in the past, and it hurts me still...but I wouldn't trade it or change it for anything.

:hug:

[mcctatas]

14. I used to, back in my sorority days...

probably still would if I drank just enough;)

[RetroLounge]

15. Not as easy as I used to, since I am getting older...

Oh, wait. You said love?

Never mind.

:hug:

:hi:

RL

[littlebit]

16. Not really

I am suspicious of everyone and I tend to over analyze everything. That's one of the main reasons my ex dumped me last month after almost nine years.

[WritingIsMyReligion]

17. No.

My brain is a giant sieve through which everything else is filtered...not much makes it to my heart. That which does, however, is almost obsessively intense and unhindered in its scope: completely overpowering and completely bittersweet.

[Deja Q]

18. Yes. I also tend to get clingy. Like saran wrap.

:(

[Haole Girl]

19. Love?

I don't know. I believe that word is overused. When I was younger, I would have answered "yes" without hesitation. Now... I really don't know. And that is an honest answer.

[DarkTirade]

20. A bit easier than I should, I think.

[Chan790]

21. Not in the least...

I used to love freely, but I made a consistent habit of loving the wrong people and now there are more scars than capacity to love. It is easier to not love than to hurt, ergo people have to earn my love.

[Swamp Rat]

22. I am extremely 'easy'

:spank:

[amitten]

23. Yes...too easily. n/t

[ThomCat]

24. No. I like people very, very easily

but I only love people after they've been my friend and I think I know them well.

[zingaro]

25. The cynic in me

wants to say that love doesn't exist, that love is merely a chemical reaction in our brain, nothing but nonsense and made up romance novel bullshit about neurons and receptors. The cynic in me wants to maintain that love is a simple cascade of endorphins at just the right time, to just the right locations.

The cynic in me wishes I would recognize every time I gave in to those endorphins and the subsequent heart-crushing pain and anguish that was the result.

And then I take a breath and remember how much I love those endorphins. Love those endorphins, yes I do. MMMMhmm. The irony works.

The real answer is that I used to "love" easily. And while I still do get off on the particular reaction of that set of neuron/receptor interaction, I have learned that they are not love for me. Love is about interaction and sustenance and dedication over time, and dedication through time. It's about priority and shared purpose and the intricate interlacing of two entities, not just the immediate reaction of zip-pow-zoom.

Funny, too, because what I've learned about love I've learned from it's absence as much as it's presence. The irony works there too, I guess. I don't know if I've actually answered this question at all lol

[SPKrazy]

32. Cynicism Isn't Impractical

In fact, it is very practical. Romantic love is an odd creature. One gets that chemical reaction love baby love, phenylethlyamine and endorphins, dopamine, etc and it serves a purpose in evolutionary reasoning. Gets two people together long enough to maybe create a baby. Then it wears off and you are left with two people, all their warts, and the question of whether it is possible or wanted to continue.

Check the divorce rate in terms of time, how many marriages last longer than two years? Then think about the acute phase of the peak of the chemistry. Around 6-9 months. Many relationships last about that long or may last a year, then one or the other is no longer wanting it, or both, so it ends. Ha, the secret of serial monogamy.

The real love for me is what happens after the rush wears off. Can two people get along? Are they compatible? Do the trust each other? Are they both available emotionally for this? If the answers are yes, then the relationship goes on.

Then comes the test of children. Once the children are born and growing, (if any) how does that affect the dynamic of the relationship? Does the relationship stand the test of time here? Then the teenage test, how can the relationship survive the stresses of having teenagers in the house.

Then the empty nest, and the couple is faced with the reality that they are together, and no distractions. Do they still love each other? What is love at that point?

On and on there are tests and strains of all kinds. I haven't made it past the children growing phase. I'm not sure that the whole children thing wasn't a distraction for us.

I'm cynical too. My recent experiences with the chemistry, and even the belief that it went beyond that, have left me pessimistic and maybe more cynical. How does one really "love"?

Love is somewhat of a delusional state anyway, right? :shrug:

[SocratesInSpirit]

34. There was a very interesting article "Of Lost Love and Old Bones"

in the Chronicle of Higher Education by Helen Fisher, a research professor in anthropology at Rutgers University. She uses brain scanning to study romantic love. (Sorry no link - I only have the hard copy, and the website requires a subscription to access.)

In the article, the author mentions how she and her colleagues (including Lucy L. Brown of the Albert Einstein College of Medicine and Arthur Aron of the State University of New York at Stony Brook) embarked on three consecutive brain-scanning experiments - using young men and women happily in love, people who have been rejected and older men and women who report they are still in love after 10+ years of marriage as subjects:

"To our astonishment, when these (latter) participants--some married more than 20 years--looked at a photo of their beloved while in the brain scanner, a brain region associated with romantic love and a region associated with attachment became active. Love's flame can live."

I found this highly encouraging. :)

[zingaro]

37. Delusional. You bet, friend.

Love is delusional. Beguiling. Misleading. And so damned much fun that you forget every time how hard you worked to prop up your armadillo shell last time it got bent and broken beneath someone's heel.

Love is what's left over after the hormones let you fall into the abyss. Sometimes there's a parachute and sometimes it's just descent into the jagged rocks.

Having fun on your vacation? I hope so. :hug:

[MilesColtrane]

26. I used to be like that.

Not any more.

I have a house on the ocean floor
The water around it is heavy, and presses in
It took many years to build the house

It requires a lot of maintenance
Little leaks spring up everywhere, and the air gets stale
But, the materials the house is made of are strong

I used to dream of swimming in the sun, but I never learned how
Now I just pray for sleep

[BeachBaby]

27. Depends on what you mean by "love".

If you're asking if I can love people in the sense of caring deeply for them....well then, yes. I love my children, I love my brother, I love my friends, I love my dogs.

If you're asking if I can "fall in love" easily......uh, no.

To me, "loving" is to care about someone - their health, their happiness, their overall welfare. Being "in love" means that I have found myself to be completely wrapped up in someone mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically. For me, being in love lends a certain amount of vulnerability that I can't say I'm really comfortable with. When I'm not in love with someone, I'm independent, in control and on top of my game. All of that goes out the window as soon as someone steals my heart.

[Guava Jelly]

28. Depends on the type of love.

Some love is earned and some just comes naturally.
I guess earned love is the kind that I fall the slowest for.
And the other. I'd have to confess,to have fallen rather quick and easy into it in the past.

[philosophie_en_rose]

29. Yep. I don't trust very easily, though.

:(

[La Lioness Priyanka]

30. yes, i love and trust very easily, mostly, i have to say, i havent been disappointed

[SarahB]

31. No.

I have regretted a lot in my life and it's hard for me to trust people. When I met my husband, I was very upset at myself for falling in love relatively quickly. I really didn't feel ready to feel that about someone again when I did, but he's not the kind of guy who can be just casual about it. He gives his whole heart, so I gave mine. Fortunately, it proved a very good decision for both of us.

[Rhythm]

33. Infatuated easily... real love maybe too easily,,,

Amazing that i've only managed to get my heart truly broken a couple of times thusfar.

[leftyclimber]

35. Friendship love? Without reservations.

Romantic love? That I'm much more cautious about.

[SKKY]

36. It's appearing that way...

...without getting into details.

[bikebloke]

38. Not any more.

I learned the hard way.

[leeroysphitz]

39. No. I am reserved and distant and feelings of affection and warmth come to me

only after a great deal of time and experience with a person.

Except for my son who I instantly loved ten times more than anyone else in the world.

Thanks for asking.

[pink-o]

40. Not anymore. Love--and food, too!--has always let me down.

After being disappointed too many times, and questioning the stupid fairy tale of romance and realising that women don't only not need a man to justify their existence but having a man around all the time is far too much of a burden, I like having lots of great male friends--gay and straight--and a few part-time lovers who don't want commitment anymore than I do.

Cynical? Probably. But this is even more so: I'm middle-aged now, but I'll probably get married again one more time in my life when I start to lose my independence and require help in certain areas--like not losing my mind. Of course, I'll be totally up-front and honest, and hopefully find a man who needs the same thing! That method has worked well thus far!

[harmonicon]

41. meh...

who knows?