What should my wife do?

[redirish28]

Okay my wife is leaving this company she has been working at. She gave notice and handed in her letter after she became very upset about a certain event.

The Day she handed in her notice her supervisor demanded to speak with her --Mind you she went to the office to turn in her notice AND attend a mandatory meeting.

The supervisor was trying to talk her out of the leaving --I'm guessing-- but my wife made it clear to the supervisor that her mind was made up and that she was too upset about the whole event to talk clearly about the situation. Supervisor continued to demand answers and kept questioning her. My wife was doing her best to keep clam BUT her was getting angry that she was being hounded. She felt trapped and cornered. It ended with the supervisor flinging a paper clip in my wife's direction to a table...and acting like my wife was in the total wrong she also didn't allow my wife into the mandatory meeting she had to attend to until her official last day of work.

I was always taught when someone says they do not want to talk about it than they should be respected and not questioned anymore.

Now this company wants her to do an "ending" interview.

A friend of my wife suggested to ignore the interview and write in a letter her feelings and let the higher ups know what happened the day she turned in her notice.

What would you do?

[Pavulon]

1. I interview, manage a team and deal with HR when needed

that situation is out of control. A person is always free to leave a meeting or discussion for any reason. I was told this early on by smart people, leave before you say something that will hurt.

What type of work is it if I may ask. Bad behavior is still bad but things could be handled differently in certain sectors.

Throwing anything at or in someones direction is pretty much an instant termination. I work at a company that is pretty roughneck, we make CNC equipment. Engineers and Machinists don't see eye to eye but throwing stuff or threatening someone is a job ending event.

If someone saw it she has recourse. That would be with the Director or VP running HR.

HOWEVER

if she needs a reference from this company she should take that into consideration. Employers are regulated here but can cause big problems at your next job.

[redirish28]

10. She works with mentally challenged indivduals. She works one on one with them

She had given a months notice hoping the company would use the time and her to help the client's through the change. They didn't bother to do anything like that.

Most client's are okay with it and she did tell them the major reason was gas prices...some client's are actually high enough fuctioning to understand that. She didn't tell them of the other things that upset her which she would never. However, one client's family member knew exactly why she was leaving and said she understood because she herself felt the same way about the company.

I see no need to do an exit interview... probably because I never heard of anything like that before nor have I ever done one before.

What is generally asked?

My wife believes the supervisor told everyone her side of the story so when my wife mentions her side it won't be believed.

[Fleshdancer]

2. If I were her (not sure if my answer is the ethically correct answer)

I would schedule this interview after my last paycheck was due to make sure they didn't hold it hostage and then cancel the ending interview once I got my money.

[Orrex]

4. That either won't work at all, or it'll backfire

For many companies, the exit interview is mandatory, and it's likely that she signed some agreement when she started that allows the company to withhold the last paycheck until the exit interview is complete.

In any case, the company isn't stupid--they know that if someone has the paycheck, that person will blow off the interview. They will refuse to give her her final check until the interview has occurred.

[Gormy Cuss]

3. What I'd do? Go to the exit interview and say nothing bad at all about the company and mention

the paper clip flinging incident in a joking way, such as "I guess SUPERVISOR is a bit upset that I'm leaving --s/he even threw a paper clip at me!--but I really do need to explore other opportunities."

It's a bullshit response but that's all that management wants to hear unless the supervisor's behavior is actionable in court. Best not to burn bridges unless there is no other choice.

YMMV.

[MorningGlow]

6. I agree, Gormy

A number of years ago I quit a job at a very dysfunctional company, but didn't say why--only that I got another job that let me do more of what I was truly interested in, which was the truth. But in the exit interview, I commented on the specifics of the dysfunction (I'll remain vague but it veers strongly into the sexual harassment realm). I thought the HR lady was going to faint. She wrote down my comments and remained neutral, but the very next day I was told the president wanted to talk to me. I met with him, and he was green. I was too naive back then to realize that he was afraid I was going to sue the company. He asked, "What do you want me to do?" and all I said was, "Make it STOP!" (I really didn't even entertain the idea of suing--it's not like much of the harassment happened to me personally--it was more the general climate of the office, so it'd have been tough to make a case anyway.)

I found out that the woman they hired to replace me looked like a (male) truck driver. They weren't taking any chances after that!
:rofl:

[Gormy Cuss]

7. The last time I had an exit interview, it was very amusing.

I knew that one of the senior VPs was gunning for my group manager, so I made sure that I gave that manager only glowing praise because I knew that if I did otherwise I would be named when the senior VP trashed my group manager, who was also my reference. I did dump on the HR department -- it was so much fun watching the veep of HR turn colors, from pink to red to crimson as he realized that he was getting exactly the WRONG feedback from me and that senior VP would be royally PO'ed that he had failed.

[MorningGlow]

8. Ah, office politics

I'm glad I'm well out of it (been freelancing for more than a year now). This morning I spent a couple of hours on the phone with a friend of mine from my last job--she told me all the drama going on and I was just GRATEFUL that I had nothing more to do with the place. Of course, the reason she called was to tell me that the editor was going to seek me out for some freelance work. And I said HELL no!

[crimsonblue]

5. isn't the exit interview with an HR rep

that is supposably conducive to your thoughts? Just tell your wife to be a blunt, negative, and viceral as possible.

[Highway61]

9. They are called "exit interviews"

I have worked in placement for a very long time. NEVER...I repeat....NEVER accept a counter offer. (They know you want to leave and they will throw big $$$ at you and interview a replacement and boot you at THEY'RE convenience....not yours) She should politely decline anymore contact and "answering" to these folks. Her mind is made up and they are trying to get a frazzle out of her. She works till her last day and answers to NO one...if anyone gets in her face and "DEMANDS" anything, she simply smiles and says..."you have my decision...there is nothing more to discuss." and walks away calmly....(sends them screaming down the street.)
One more thing....her "supervisor" is all pinched up over this...NOT the CEO or President ...bet he doesn't even know about this. (bad reflection on the "supervisor"...if ya ask me...that's why they are upset).
Sounds like she was in a dead end situation anyway. I wish her luck!
I don't know what she does but if you need any leads p.m. me...I'd be glad to help if I can.

[UTUSN]

11. The friend's anwer is IT!1 n/t