If I Started My Own Religion...

[SPKrazy]

what should we sacrifice?

:shrug:

no animals please... especially kittehs and puppies, or squirrels, etc.

Should we even sacrifice anything?

I'm thinking 10% is kind of low for tithing, I mean tips are 15-20% expected now, so I'm upping tithing to 15% or higher.

Should the best seats be given to the highest tithers?

What will we worship? Oil? Money? God? Earth? Universal Goodness? The fact that we are on a fucking rock speeding away from the center of an explosion at the speed of light, spinning around, orbiting the sun, with a moon and space junk orbiting us, and we are all moving away at the speed of light from the center of this explosion but due to the theory of relativity, we can't tell anything like that. I'm thinking that is miraculous. How many parallel universes are splitting away or coexisting in the same space as us?

Or maybe we should do this guy?



and just tell people: "tithe, talk to this guy, and everything gonna be okay"

Anyone want to join my new religion?

:P

:shrug:


yes, this is a strange post, I'm thinking that coming down in altitude has had some strange effect on my brain as well as going up did. :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

or maybe I'm just a weird leader of a new religious movement destined to take over the world :crazy:

ps don't drink the Kool-Aid, EVAH!!!!

[Breeze54]

1. Does 'it' have a name yet?

Southpawkicker Mission? :P

[SPKrazy]

3. Maybe in the beginning it could be a mission

but after it gets established,(to engender charitable giving to get more money)then it should be Southpawkicker Temple or something don't ya think?

:rofl:

[Breeze54]

8. Temple of Doom?

:rofl:

Den of Iniquity? :P

[SPKrazy]

13. Temple of Iniquity

maybe

with a den of doom

for those who don't misbehave :P

[hobbit709]

2. Finagle is God

AND MURPHY IS HIS PROPHET!
and the stupid sacrifice themselves.
And here is his message

[SPKrazy]

4. Is this an Rohrschach (inkblot) test?

:shrug:

I see a vagina

:spray:

[Breeze54]

5. Looks like he's flipping the bird!!

:P

[SPKrazy]

6. ya think?

I sill see a vagina



:rofl:

[Ysabel]

19. i see that too...

[SPKrazy]

22. see...

it's a vagina flipping the bird :P

[hobbit709]

11. NASA Hubble photo

and does look like god is giving us the bird.

[Breeze54]

16. Yeah, I've seen it before but still looks like the bird being flipped!

:D

[Ysabel]

18. yes i see that...

[Tuesday Afternoon]

7. I understand that Obama is a Christian --

just sayin'

[SPKrazy]

9. That's cool, he may want to convert

:shrug:

:hi:

[Tuesday Afternoon]

10. to Muslim

perhaps?

:shrug:

[SPKrazy]

12. No silly

to Southpawkickerism or something

my religion

Muslim :eyes:

[Tuesday Afternoon]

14. I thought he was Muslim

:yoiks:

[SPKrazy]

21. No no no no no

:spank:


:rofl:

[Ysabel]

20. southpawkickerism is kinda catchy but i'm sticking with ysabelism...

[SPKrazy]

25. Well, start your own religion then

:P

:rofl:

[Ysabel]

26. nanananaaaaa i already have (so there)...

:rofl:

- aren't you going to try harder to convert me tho...?

:P

p.s. perhaps twist my arm or something (i really do think the name of yours is catchy)... :D

[SPKrazy]

27. We prefer to call it

waterboarding :spray:

jk




now, come on, don't make me twist any harder, I really need your mon.., I mean your trust in Southpawkickerism, it is important. :D

[Ysabel]

28. you've just about sold me... :D

[SPKrazy]

32. Okay....

Ysabel-ism, now someone might think that was a dis-ease.

Southpawkickerism... at least people would only mistake for a way of kicking or an affinity to kick southpaws or something :P

:rofl:


Come on, you know you wanna join :D

We have good food, good parties, Skinner will let us have a party in the lounge even :D

;)

[Ysabel]

35. a disease...!

now you're picking on my religion maybe your religion should be called southpawpickerism... :rofl:

- and yet food and parties are very tempting... :)

[SPKrazy]

36. I have been called

Pawpicker by several people here

:rofl:


so maybe just pawpickerism

I'm just pointing out how adding ism to your screen name might not sound as good as it could, say if it WERE MY RELIGION AND MY SCREEN NAME

:D

come on, ya wanna ya wanna

:bounce: :bounce:

[Ysabel]

40. actually i don't like my id so very much anymore...

i think maybe we should all convert to kimism...

- yes you wanna be a kim (which is MY name) too yes yes you do dont ya just like ME... :D

--------

p.s. there see how easily i converted...

- you can do it too... :rofl:

[SPKrazy]

42. Kimism....

hmm....

you are digging in your heels.

I have known some cool Kims. I can see the appeal to Kimism...

however...

WE ARE TALKING ABOUT SOUTHPAWKICKERISM...MY RELIGION...MY THREAD....


maybe we could work together, like have dual deities, and we could like have Kimism as a extra special part of the Church of Southpawkickerism... yanno?

Like you said, who wouldn't want to be a KIM????

:D

:hi:

[Ysabel]

44. it's a deal...!

extra special yes i like that so okay...! :)

:hi:

[SPKrazy]

45. Cool!

deal is a deal

:woohoo:

what about even having "radical Kimists" who raise hell in the name of Kim?

:shrug:

:D

:hi:

[Ysabel]

46. yes and they can force me upon er show the world how special i am...

and collect all the money er the ties or oh whatever i'm sleepy... :P

(and just put it all under my special kimist pillow)...

:hi:

[SPKrazy]

49. cool!

[moriah]

15. Burnt offerings are pleasing.

Especially sandalwood.

I like burned sandalwood.

Oh, what, you aren't worshiping me?

[SPKrazy]

23. I dunno,

you hail from Arkansas

I do as well

where are you??

I'm in the Old Fort... (aka Ft Smith)

I like burned sandalwood

we could burn all the sandalwood around... please us all!!!!!


:D

:hi:

[moriah]

30. I'm about 60-70 miles north of you.

At least, I think that's how far it is to I-40 from my current location across the railroad tracks from the Beast of Bentonville.

[SPKrazy]

31. Add about 8 miles South on 540

Hey neighbor!

Ya burnin' Sandalwood up there to run the beast off???

Flew in to the "Fayetteville Airport" :rofl: at least that is what they said when we landed "Welcome to Fayetteville".

Uhm... glad these people aren't supposed to be able to read maps or anything :P

:hi:

[moriah]

38. Actually I take care of their computer servers.

I just burn sandalwood because it is pleasing to me. :)

I haven't sold my soul, I just rent it out....

[SPKrazy]

41. Heh

Teh beast is no different than any corporate beast, although I'll get flamed prolly for saying that, I believe it is true.

:)

[skygazer]

17. Let's worship artichokes

I love artichokes. :9

[SPKrazy]

24. I love artichoke dip

can we have dip :bounce: :bounce:

:9

:hi:

wait its my church

we will have dip and artichokes however we want them!!!! But worship?

Maybe as a tertiary deity

[AnneD]

29. That could be in the

baptismal font.along with communion wafers.

[SPKrazy]

33. Great idea...

and a little refrigerated bottom to the baptismal font

although, we'll just sprinkle some on someone if they want to be baptized :rofl:


:shrug:

[MrScorpio]

34. You have to do good things for the misfortunate

It's called Do-Goodness

[SPKrazy]

37. Meh, you wanna do that

go ahead

I'm thinking religion shouldn't be about that kinda thing :D

:hi:

:rofl:

[MrScorpio]

39. If it ain't practical, it's garbage

That's my philosophy

[SPKrazy]

43. Its practical for me

my religion

my rules

my dogma

my money, er... I mean, my philanthropic ideals :D

[Gormy Cuss]

47. Clowns.

Sacrifice clowns.

Make lounge posts sacraments.
:hi:

[SPKrazy]

50. excellent!!!!!!!

:rofl:

[undeterred]

48. We should sacrifice sluts

just to be different from those who sacrifice virgins. And people should contribute their old CDs. Take one, leave one.

[SPKrazy]

51. ...

:spray:

:rofl:

[Ysabel]

52. the radical kimists are here with their demands...!!!

fundies (all the funds you can gather / send money now !!!) are urgently needed for the kimist school of research and laboratories (not THAT kind of labor forget that old fashioned stuff we'll have no hanky panky here raise your southpaws and northpaws your east and west paws too the tired and hungry and the huddled masses (we have drinks: please see note below) if you are with us there now that's the kicker never again shall any such thing occur in this sacred lounge school !!!) we need test tube babies pronto which is all part of the master kimist's and her specialist plan to take over the the lounge and possibly also the world we shall oh yes we shall amen...

- (her specialness KIM is just now waking and arising soon she will become a great gigantic monster fully realizing all the possibilities of how wonderful this will all be and if all goes according to plan everyone else shall realize it too and if any of you need more convincing the kimists have mixed together a very special kimist concoction for you to drink which is way better than kool-aid you've ever tasted so step right up and drink to your eternal subjugation and delight and oh yeah you may attend mass as well if that's your thing)...

on your knees...!!!

(grrrrr...oh my kimist all look adoringly upon her the monsterousness is already really happening)...

p.s. oh yes excuse us for almost forgetting (a mere footnote however important in the annals of the religion of kimist history) yes if you insist southpawkickerism may be studied at the school as well just go down that dark hallway behind the coat rack there now shoo shoo achoo ahem amen A-KIM please excuse us again...

- good morning... :)

[SPKrazy]

53. A-Kim, A-Kim

:toast:

radical Kimism, hmmm...., we will keep our eyes on you, but go ahead and be that special part of our religion, sort of like the elder statespersons crossed with ninjas who are also some variation of some fringe component of some movement, somewhere. :P


:hi: