So, Sarah Palin walks into a bar...

[LeftyFingerPop]

Bartender says...what can I get you?

Sarah says...In what respect, Charlie?

John McCain, who is sitting by himself in a booth, sees Sarah, and starts yelling...FUCK YOU, YOU TROLLOP! DON'T TOUCH MY FUCKING HAIR, THE ECONOMY IS GOOD, THE FUNDAMENTALS ARE SOUND!

So then Palin runs up to McCain to comfort him, and says...John, it's me! Sarah!

McCain looks at her and starts smiling...Oh it is you Sarah! Eh he! Eh eh!

Then McCain starts to drool in the corner of his mouth a little, and Sarah wipes it away.

And then...and then....where was I?

[PVnRT]

1. ....

http://johnmccainisgrandpa.ytmnd.com/

[LeftyFingerPop]

2. Perfect!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

"I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time"

[PVnRT]

3. Gimme five bees for a quarter

They didn't have white onions, because of the War.

[mikeytherat]

11. "And we had turkey, which we called a 'Walking Bird,' plus all the fixins, like

injun eyes, and yams stuffed with gunpowder."

mikey_the_rat

[Shiver]

14. "We had to use the word "dickety"...

because the Kaiser had stolen our word 'twenty'. I tried to chase to get it back, but gave up after dickety-six miles..."

Wait... that was a different episode...

[MilesColtrane]

4. Sarah Palin walked into a bar...

...but only caught her heel on it a little because the bar had been lowered.

[GreenPartyVoter]

8. LOL

[DeepBlueC]

15. promising...

:rofl: but you need to get the physical logic working

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

5. sorry miss, the bar is closed... the moose

out front should have told ya

Palin.... oh, I shot the moose, if you vote for me, I'll show you my beaver

[mnhtnbb]

6. And then McCain says,"Sarah, I think I need my Depends changed. Will you do it?"

[gmoney]

9. "That's not change I can believe in..."

[mnhtnbb]

10. Ha!

:rofl:

[ironflange]

7. She then cuts up his meat for him

At least so long as it's moose meat.

He tries briefly, but she soon also has to wield the fork for him. She soon realizes she has to chew it for him, too. . .

[old mark]

12. "...and the bartender says," Where'd ya get the lipstick?"

(Or is it "...I was talkin' to the pig!"


mark

[Shiver]

13. So Sarah Palin walks into a bar...

..and shuts the door behind her, hanging her moose-fur coat on a nearby peg. Everyone turns to look at her and she smiles broadly, thrilled to be the center of attention. She clears her throat and adjusts her glasses a little, eyes dancing around as she tries to locate the teleprompter.

The silence in the bar is palpable, everyone leaning forward in their seats and barstools as they await the Republican Vice-Presidential Nominee's words. Many had seen her on the television, giving speeches to crowds numbering somewhere between 500 and 5000 people - accounts vary - and were curious what Sarah Palin would be doing here, in a regular bar, of all places. Surely she had some words of wisdom for them, information that would sway them to vote for her... and McCain, they supposed, but he was inconsequential. She was the pretty one.

Clearing her throat again, Sarah basked in their adoration; she didn't need a teleprompter, she was a natural-born speaker, so much better than that brainy black man Johnny was always so worried about. Taking in a deep breath, she spoke with sincerity and conviction, knowing she would be changing these people's lives.

"I can see Russia from my house!"

A cricket chirped. The eyes of the establishment's patrons stared at her incredulously. "Yeah," One woman said from her stool, turning her back on the Alaskan Governor. "Well, I can see you from where I'm sittin', but that don't make me an expert on stupid."


This has been a lengthy joke, by Shiver...

[Monk06]

16. So Sarah Palin walks into a bar ......

and asks the bar tender, "Can you make me a Community Activist?"

The bartender says, "Sure if you tell me what's in it."

[skygazer]

17. So John says, "Can you drive me home?"

And Sarah says, "Sure, which house?" And John says, "Um, I don't know... how many houses do I have? You know, I spent FIVE FUCKING YEARS IN A BOX, I DIDN'T HAVE A BAR, OR A BARSTOOL..."