Adopted a new kitty...have I made a huge mistake?

[WillParkinson]

Paul and I went to the shelter on Saturday. I was intent on picking up a kitty to bring home with us. The kitty I had seen, Oreo, had been adopted and I was very happy for him. The other kitty I was looking at, Heidi, apparently had separation anxiety when taken away from her sibling and they wanted to have them adopted together. We agreed we could adopt one, but not two cats.

So I left it up to Paul. Who fussed about it. I explained to him that I needed him to make a choice. It had to be a kitty he could love and care for, not just something that's there because I wanted it. So I left him alone with the long line of cats at the shelter. When I came back a few minutes later he was rubbing and cuddling with a cat they named Big Foot because he had HUGE feet with extra toes. He looked at me and said, "This one." I rubbed the kitty and it just started like a motor-boat purring away.

We filled out the forms and returned on Sunday morning to pick him up. On the way home we discussed the name. Neither of us cared for his original name so we brainstormed. I mentioned the name "Toe-by" (Toby) and Paul busted out laughing and said he liked the name. That was going to be his name.

Got home and introduced him to the place. Now it's Tuesday, 2 days later. He's cowering in the bathroom cabinet. When I have taken him out to get him to know the other family members (3 dogs, 3 cats) all he does is hiss and run back into the bathroom cabinet. If I go in and close the door he comes out and stretches across my lap and the motorboat starts up again.

But he's not keen on his family.

I so hope this ends well.

[mikeytherat]

1. It can take a few days to a week or so to integrate a newby.

Ours always start out hissing and fussing, end up playing and sleeping together.

Give it time.

mikey_the_rat

[WillParkinson]

2. The cats are bad enough...

Next comes the dogs. 2 of them won't care. The other one, Bailey, oh yeah, he'll be a problem. He likes to play with the cats like he's one of them. That should prove interesting.

[Orsino]

18. Peace could take months.

You might catch them cuddling up together if they don't know you're there, only to hiss and run away when discovered in flagrante.

[littlebit]

3. It takes a little while sometimes.

It took my beagle a few months before she was ok with the other dogs. Just give him time he will come around.

[WillParkinson]

6. Thanks much!

I worry a lot. I don't want Toeby to be too freaked out. FLVegan game some great advice and I'm going to give it a try in a few minutes.

[flvegan]

4. Find yourself a cat carrier, put Toby in that.

Put the carrier in the middle of the room for a couple hours. Let everyone come out and sniff him. Then put him back in his safe area (the bathroom) for a while out of the carrier. Repeat.

Transitioning in a new cat to a big family can take a little time, but it'll work. Bear in mind, this new cat came from God knows where and God knows what situation. Then, into a shelter, which is highly traumatic. Now, in a new home, with 6 new siblings that are all going to want to get to know him...at once. Overwhelming.

It might take a few days, it might take two weeks. I would just give him the option of being out or having his safe area in the bathroom. When he's ready to to have family, he will.

Thanks for adopting!

[WillParkinson]

5. Adoption....

It's the only way to go.

The only thing we know about Toeby is that he was a stray picked up in Michigan. He's a very scared kitty. I'm hoping he comes around quickly, because I want him to roam the house and infect everyone with his purr-fect attitude.

[jobycom]

15. I rarely disagree with you on beasties, but I've got a minor one on this.

I'd be hesitant to do this until Toeby got comfortable in his own cabinet, first. Cats are more delicate than people realize, and putting him in a cage in the middle of a room full of animals before he's even settled down to his new place could be traumatic. It's good advice, but first I'd let him get used to the bathroom cabinet first, and get him to where Paul can sit on the bathroom floor near the cabinet and hold him without him spitting or hissing.

[applegrove]

7. Try keeping him behind a closed bedroom door. The other cats will

be at the door to find out about the new critter and the kitten will not be able to resist playing with paws underneath the door. Then all the cats will like each other. And the older cats will be totally charmed by the little one. And the little one will be desperate to get out from the door and start really playing with the other cats. I'd keep the dogs away until you have at least some trust build up between all the cats. IMHO

[Sheets of Easter]

8. He needs at least a couple weeks to acclimate.

Put him in a room by himself, with food, toys and his litter box close by. Introduce the other pets slowly. He'll come around.

[anneboleyn]

16. Yes, at least a couple of weeks -- it's a big shock for them to be adopted plus the new animals

are going to freak him out for awhile, even if he is really brave. My cat makes friends easily but he can be very shy and hissy at first until he feels secure.

[mike_c]

9. don't be too concerned yet....

As others have pointed out, it will take at least a couple of weeks, maybe much more. Get a Feliway diffuser-- that will help, but it will still take time. Cats are solitary or semi-solitary by nature. They certainly don't have any pack sensibilities so their initial interactions are almost always aggressive or scared/hiding. Give them time. LOTS of time.

I have a friend staying at my house that brought her three cats. I have four cats. She's been here a month and the cats have just about reached the neutral tolerance stage, but they still fight occasionally and the are nowhere NEAR the friendly and integrated stage.

[dhpgetsit]

10. Many cats hate moves, especially when introduced to other pets.

We have been in this hous over a year now and my can is only recently comportable with the home and housemates' pets. For months she would not come out of our bedroom. I suggest making a special place he can call his own, probably in that bathroom. He will eventually get more adveturous.

[REP]

11. #1 Congrats!!

#2 If he's coming out to see you and is friendly with you in such a short time, you're making terrific progress. Two days is not enough time for a kitten to get comfy in a new home, but that he's friends with you already shows that he can adapt, and do it well.

#3 Congrats!!

[WillParkinson]

12. Well I did do something stupid today...

Took him out of the bathroom and was sitting with him on the floor in the kitchen so the other cats could see me interacting with him.

Bailey was in the kitchen so I figured there was no problem.

He got up to get a drink of water and saw the new kitty. Barked his fool head off.

Toeby decided that was too much and up over my shoulder, clawing all the way.

I shall remember this day for a while it seems.

[Ikonoklast]

13. Slowly, slowly, slowly.

Flvegan gave you a good game plan, but it takes time, and the schedule is set by the participants, not you, unfortunately.

We currently have two feral siblings that after one month, three of our adult cats are just now starting to tolerate without all the hissing and swatting.

We have a large cage set up with all the amenities for the kitties, and the adult cats can come over an inspect them and get used to their smell and presence.

The oldest male cat we have was indifferent to the kitties right from the start; he seems mildly amused at their antics and has no problem eating right next to them in the kitchen.

Congratulations on your new kitty. I hope Toeby has a nice safe forever home with you.

[jobycom]

14. that's exactly how he should act. Don't force him out, don't bother him

Give him his own food and water. He will get used to the place, and the other animals, on his own time, even if he's not in community with them. He's scared, he's just got to figure it out. I've had many cats do exactly that, and I've had some cats do that every time I moved to a new place. They have to adjust, and forcing them only scares them. Let him be, check in on him now and then to let him know he's wanted and that he's safe where he is. Let him get used to your face and the smell and sounds. He's also still freaked out about the car ride.

Also, let Paul sit outside the cabinet and talk to him. Prop the door open, and just let him talk softly. Toe-by (I love that!) has already bonded a little with Paul, so Paul is a familiar face. Tell Paul not to reach in for him, but he can try to coax him. If Toe-by comes, Paul can let him sniff, and pet him, but don't try to force Toe-by into anything. This will help Toe-by adjust, and will teach Paul a few things about cats, too.

Takes anywhere from three days to two weeks. You did NOT make a mistake, because Toe-by would act that way anywhere, and if you bring him back, he may not find a home. So even sputtering and spitting in a closet, Toe-by is better off with you. Eventually Toe-by will become the same motorboat you first saw. He's just got to get used to his home, so he can become himself.

Plus, the other pets will get used to his smell, and his presence.

[WillParkinson]

20. Thanks Jobycom...

I would NEVER take him back to the shelter. This will be his home and everyone will get used to him, I know. I was just hoping they'd bond quickly so he could enjoy it.

But patience is a virtue I've seldom possessed.

[bicentennial_baby]

17. You should have read up on new cat integration first

http://www.all-creatures.org/articles/cac-cats-integration.html

it can takes weeks to months, even when done properly.

[WillParkinson]

19. Did read...

Some folks give better advice than webpages, though.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

21. Welcome, Toeby.

Give him plenty of time. Lots of good advice on this thread.