Subject: USA - outage report

[spindrifter]

We, the United States of America, your top quality supplier of ideals of
democracy, would like to apologize for our 2001-2008 interruption in
service. The technical fault that led to this eight-year service outage
has been located, and the software responsible was replaced November 4.
Early tests of the newly installed program indicate that we are now
operating correctly, and we expect it to be fully functional from this
point forward. We apologize for any inconvenience caused by the outage.
We look forward to resuming full service and hope to improve in years to
come. We thank you for your patience and understanding.
Sincerely,
THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

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In case you didn't receive this yet.