Enough with this "secret admirer" crap already!

[Richard Steele]

Look folks, here's the deal:
NO ONE is spending money to send me Valentine Hearts.

The hearts I have were randomly generated by the DU master server,
because recieving hearts makes folks more likely to $end heart$.
Those hearts were sent to me by a small piece of computer code.
A code written & installed for the purpose of increasing donations
from impoverished non-regular-donors like me.


Think about it:
Did you buy me a heart?
Do you know anyone who did?

No, you didn't and you don't.


Duh.

[Pushed To The Left]

1. I think I got an automatic heart after I made a donation. That's what happened after I made

donations other years. I would be pretty surprised if I got a heart any other way. However, I think most of the hearts others are getting are legitimately coming from other people. I know I have sent a few.

[XemaSab]

36. You'd be surprised?

;)

[Pushed To The Left]

40. Yes, I am surprised!

:hug: Thanks!

[SeattleGirl]

2. Mmmmm, so I guess the hearts I thought I gave away were nothing

but a figment of my imagination, huh?

:eyes:

[murielm99]

8. I gave my hearts to people who didn't have any.

Soon after, I noticed two DUers whom I had given hearts responding in a thank-you thread. One of them said something like, "Someone loves even ME."

I don't know that DUer very well, even though he is a member. But I felt like I had done something nice. Now you are spoiling it.

[Heidi]

10. You _did_ do something nice.

:hug:

[SeattleGirl]

29. I'm spoiling it? I hope you know that my post was a sarcastic response

to the OP.

I love getting and giving hearts.

[murielm99]

32. Well, crap. I responded to the wrong post.

I meant to respond to the OP.

Sorry!

[SeattleGirl]

33. Thought that might be it, but just thought I'd check.

It's all good. :hi:

[Heidi]

3. With all due respect, I tested your theory and it doesn't hold up.

There are DUers who don't even have one heart yet. If your theory were valid, each DUer would have received at least one heart as an incentive to give.

Anyway, you seem like a good guy, and I'm glad to see you with some hearts. :hug:

[Jamastiene]

4. Go ahead and call the Whaaaambulance for me then!

I thought maybe a few people actually liked me. Now, I find out they don't. And I was just starting to cheer up about being so alone. :cry:

[SeattleGirl]

6. Aw, now.

At least you know the DU random heart generator loves you.

:pals:

[TZ]

9. hey now

I'm gonna own up to being one of your secret admirers okay...;)

[Jamastiene]

23. Awwww,

thank you. :hug: :loveya: :)

[stewartcolbert08]

5. Aw, you really think thats what it is?

I dont think so!

[enigmatic]

7. I'm mostly w./ you on this

I'm not a fan of the whole heart thing; the only one I want is from Mrs, E, but I know I'm in the small minority of this. I just generally try to stay away until it's over with, but again, I know I'm in the minority w/ this..

[redqueen]

11. I'm just going to hope this is a joke. (nt)

[NoPasaran]

12. Even a randomly generated heart is better

Than Grovelbot reformatting your hard drive.

[NuttyFluffers]

13. you may not borrow my corn flakes...

no matter how bad you have to go

[supernova]

14. Yeah, keep thinkin' that, Dude

*taps foot*

:P

[Richard Steele]

26. Oh....

Well, don't I feel stupid. :blush:

Seems like everytime I think I can't possibly find a new way
to accidentally offend & insult the people I like the most...
I find a new way.
I'm such an awkward asshole sometimes. Stupid stupid STUPID:banghead:

Shit like this is the reason I'm so quiet and reserved in real life, you know.
My mouth is not my friend, so I've learned to keep it shut.

Thank you for the heart. I'm touched...and I have no idea what to say
about it beyond "thank you".

Thank You.

Sincerely,
Richard Steele

[REP]

30. Don't feel bad

Your post actually made me feel better (until I read all the rebuttals).

[enigmatic]

34. Don't worry about it

You said what you wanted to say. With the unrelenting inflammatory garbage posted on this board day after day, your OP was pretty innocuous in the grand scheme. I've seen your posts over the years and I know you're a good guy. Shake it off.

[Richard Steele]

39. I have good reason to worry about it.

Sure, I'm a "good guy"...but I have to bust my ass every day to be one.
It's not in my nature- I have to WORK at it.
I went to prison at age 14, fer chrissakes. (and very deservedly so)

I've been a lot of places and seen a lot of shit, and I can tell you
that SUPERNOVA is one of the most geuninely NICE people to ever
walk the face of this earth.

She did ONE tiny little nice thing for me, and this OP took a big DUMP on it.
So don't tell me I shouldn't feel bad, bacause I SHOULD.

And I do.

[JVS]

15. It was I

[JesterCS]

16. I dont have any =(

Im not loved.. then again im not a regular poster.. just a lurker =p

[JesterCS]

25. awww

i got some now =D woo

[blondeatlast]

17. ZOMG!!! Hope you don't mind too awfully much! nt

[Tuesday Afternoon]

18. I think your tinfoil hat is on too tight,

That's what I think :D

[Dangerously Amused]

19. My theory for the last few years has been

...that everyone - or at least recent posters within X many years/months - gets one master server generated heart, each of which are sent out at different, random times toward the beginning of the drive.

There may be other actions which prompt additional master server generated hearts as other posters have noted, such as purchasing hearts to give... and I don't know about those theories, but I am pretty sure of my own.

One can argue that providing hearts in this manner is simply a nice gesture on the part of the DU admin., as well as a way to address the "it's the equivalent of a grade school popularity contest and I feel bad for the people who don't get any hearts at all; as a progressive website we should be more sensitive to these issues" complaints of some here. However, the fact that doing so is also a slick marketing device certain to generate substantial revenue (particularly given the "anonymous" aspect of the donor) cannot be overlooked.

[no name no slogan]

20. Getcher credit card out and buy some freaking hearts already

cheapskate. :D

[rug]

21. I've always been fond of randomly generated computer code.

:loveya:

[Arugula Latte]

22. The DU master server sure knows who the most popular DUers are, though.

It's not "random" that someone like CaliforniaPeggy is swimming in hearts. :)

[plcdude]

24. Just checking

my lack of hearts.

O thank you secret admirer I am feeling so much better now :puffpiece:

[Fire Walk With Me]

27. Same here. I emailed a Mod to see if they could be removed

but haven't heard back.

[Fire Walk With Me]

31. I am 100% serious. If it is possible, please remove the hearts donated to me.

Thank you very much.

[Name removed]

28. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Richard Steele]

35. Everyvword of your post is an excellent summation of how I'm feeling right now.

Look upthread: SUPERNOVA gave me one of those hearts.

She's an AWESOME DUer, a truly NICE person,
and, since I've had the priveledge of being invited into her home,
I can say without resevation that she's an AMAZING hostess.

She's a great person who did a nice thing for me, and I CRAPPED all over it.



I wish I was a younger man. Back in my 20's, I was strong enough
to lift rocks big enough to CRAWL UNDER.

I'm really wishing that I was that strong right now, KnowhutImean?

[Jamastiene]

37. You hurt my feelings too until TZ let me know my hearts are REAL

So, THERE! My hearts are REAL.

x(

[XemaSab]

38. I have given 6 hearts in two separate donation events

5 to people I like...

...and one to someone who pissed my shit off ROYALLY. :D

Good times. :D

[struggle4progress]

41. Hey, Richard: see your Smile heart? IIRC that was from me. I can't remember

exactly why I gave it to you: I was probably hoping you'd invite the Lounge over for venison stew

I also gave hearts (1) to DUers I had actually met; (2) to DUers whose posts I regularly enjoy reading; (3) to various heartless posters; and (4) like Xema Sab, I gave at least one of my hearts to somebody I thought was a royal pain-in-the-butt, on the old theory that it never hurts to spread the love

[Steerpike]

42. I'm so self centered...

I contributed and then gave myself 3 hearts...the fourth was auto generated when my check cleared...