Should I divorce Haruka over this -- serious advice only

[LostinVA]

So, I opened the dishwasher yesterday and shrieked,"What the fuck is THIS doing in here?!" "This" being my very nice and very expensive Chef's knife. The knife I've told her 500 times must be used, washed and dried immediately after use, and put in the drawer back in it's blade guard, snug as a bug in a rug.

God knows how many times she's done this before behind my back. The trust is gone.

What should I do, DU????

Between this and finding out my Border Collies are Indigo, my world has been turned upside down.

:cry:

[Midlodemocrat]

1. Dude. I feel your pain.

How many thousands of times have I told Mr. that the used coffee filter goes in the compactor, not the sink?


:cry:

I'd leave him, but he'd cry.

[LostinVA]

2. I KNEW from her look of guilt that this WAS NOT THE FIRST TIME THIS HAS HAPPENED

The betrayal!!!

Know what she said to me? "Dude, we have a really good knife sharpener in the drawer." Like that makes it all better.

[Midlodemocrat]

4. I'm crying over here for you.

The betrayal. I know how much it hurts. Been there. He even dumped cereal into the side of the side with the drain and not the disposal.

I don't know how much more I can bear before I snap.

[Shakespeare]

9. It's not a sharpness thing--it'll ruin the rivets in the handle!

:cry:

[LostinVA]

13. I've been a shell of my former self since I found out

It's bad enough she puts the crystal in the dishwasher.

[southpaw]

3. If it's a Henckle or a Wustaf, call a good attourney

You can't really be married to someone who disrespects fine cutlery, now can you?

[LostinVA]

8. It's a Global

[southpaw]

18. Global?

I would kill for a Global santoku!

Ever since I got my hands on a santoku, my western-style knives (Henckle) tend to stay in their block.

I have a small (5" blade) Japanese-made (Zen blade stamp... bought at Target for $39.00) santoku that I use for damn near everything now.

[LostinVA]

20. It was a wedding registry thing -- I was so excited someone bought it!

I have a 5" one, too. Aren't the Japanese chef knives wonderful?!

[Beer Snob-50]

36. i read this post and i think of kill bill

and the samuri sword uma thurman had made especially for killing.

:scared:

[Tektonik]

47. Kill her

Globals are so nice.

[LostinVA]

50. I have people in my extended family who can...

... take care of things.

[Tektonik]

55. This guy will do it for you

http://www.katezimmerman.ca/writing/chefs/bourdain.html

[Orrex]

5. Begin wearing the knife strapped to your thigh. Also...

Cover yourself from head-to-toe in camo paint, and build a fort out of the couch cushions.

[LostinVA]

17. I may hide the good knife, and make her use the cheap IKEA ones

[Orrex]

25. Now that's just cruel

[Jamastiene]

64. Oh, damn, that sounds like so much fun.

:P

[Shakespeare]

6. I hope you found it BEFORE the dishes were run.

:cry: :cry: :cry:

You may need a good attorney. That same issue is a major source of conflict for us, too.

[LostinVA]

10. NO -- it was after, but that's not the worst thing

Once, I caught her using it to cut open a bag of lettuce!!!!!!

[Shakespeare]

16. *screams in horror*

That's....tragic. :-(

[LostinVA]

22. I'm not even making any of this up

It was horrific!

[Shakespeare]

23. I've at least got him trained not to put ours in the dishwasher.

Because I think he thinks I really WOULD kill him for that.

What I can't break him of is leaving it in the sink, in WATER, where gets little rust spots on the blade. :banghead:

[LostinVA]

26. She has done that, too

Or, on the cutting board for hours while the garlic/onion/etc. dries into cement-like slices.

[Shakespeare]

27. THAT TOO!

Use, wash, dry, put away. WHAT is so hard about that? :cry:

[LostinVA]

30. They are both intelligent people

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

46. It's a good thing she doesn't know about the time I used it to cut the plastic around the butter tub

[LostinVA]

52. THAT BETTER BE A JOKE

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

53. You will never know, will you?

[Debi]

62. Does she wipe it clean with one of those baby diapers???

:shrug:

How do you live with the old bag?

[LostinVA]

69. If I wasn't late to the Early Birder, I'd tell you off right now!!!!!

[Debi]

75. Hurry or they'll be all out of bread pudding

and you know what pie-crust does to your gums.

[LostinVA]

77. They better not be -- I had the prune whip yesterday

[Tektonik]

7. At least it's your wife who did it

My roommates have done the same thing. What the fuck am I supposed to do to them? Fuck I can slug 'em, but I can't divorce them. :(

[LostinVA]

15. I honestly would kill them

[Tektonik]

29. This is my knife

I found it yesterday morning in the sink covered in tomato sauce just laying there. I should have killed everyone in the apartment because I know it had just been used to cut pizza after our beer pong games. They're so lucky I fell asleep after beer pong. My poor knife :(.

[LostinVA]

32. I seriously would keep it in my bedroom somewhere

I'm not joking.

[Tektonik]

35. In my last place I used my closet for all my good pots and pans

Half my closet was clothes, the other, my 75% off All Clad :D.

I had a roommate kill my paring knife.

These current roommates are my brothers' friends so they generally take good care of my stuff, EXCEPT when they're drunk cutting DiGiornos with my fucking knife.

[Crabby Appleton]

11. Yes, you never under any circumstances put a good knife

in the dishwasher, it should be a federal offense.

[flvegan]

12. I insist she stay with me while you work out the details.

[LostinVA]

14. No

[sasquatch]

21. Or me, I have no dishwasher

:D

[Shell Beau]

19. My husband does the same thing with our expensive knives.

They are to only be handwashed. He sneaks them in the dishwasher when he thinks I am not looking. :spank:

[AlCzervik]

24. my husband wrecked an entire set of Chicago cutlery knives i used to have by putting

them in the dishwasher, he also wrecked my calphalon by using metal grill like utensils on them. I swear to god he did it so i'd just say "Leave it, i'll clean it up" anyhow i've switched over to stainless steel cookware because i'm pretty sure even he can't totally kill that and i've told him to leave the knives in the sink, i'll take care of them.

[LostinVA]

28. She at least doesn't use metal on the good pots and pans

Mainly because I replaced almost everything with silicone utensils so she can't scratch the finish.

[AlCzervik]

31. oh we had silicone utensils, he just didn't use them. I was so fing angry because

not a one was unscathed by his Fred Flintstone spatula and one time i caught him using a fork to stab some cutlets and flip them over.

[Tektonik]

33. For having a yuppie kitchen you need better knives than Chicago Cutlery

:o

YOU CAN kill stainless steel, or at least make it ugly as fuck. I had a roommate get salt pits in one of my all clad sauce pans. :(

[AlCzervik]

34. i got a set of henckels that no one touches except for me. All clad makes some nice

pans.

[Tektonik]

37. Mmm Henckels

My Henckels off set serrated definitely left a nice gash on my index finger. You never feel pain when you get cut by a good knife, just warmth.

[Rabrrrrrr]

38. To speak in his defense, that Chicago Cutlery didn't have far to go to be ruined.

[AlCzervik]

40. no it didn't but it was the first set of knives i ever got, i didn't know any better.

[taterguy]

39. Sounds like you're just looking for an excuse to dump her

Is she too old for you now?

[LostinVA]

41. She'll be 26 next week -- ewwwww

[seabeyond]

42. bah hahah. i just gotta laugh cause, well my hubby has the same issue

that and the remote. whenever i want to play a bit i start asking for the remote, please please. but i never play with the knife. lol

ya ya ya

handwash, dry ect....

my husband will get a giggle at the dinner table conversation from this thread.

and seriously? no divorce. hide the knife and only you use, wink. and you hand wash, and you dry, and you put away

[Fleshdancer]

43. Could this be payback from the time you called her that word?

I can't remember what you called her, but I know it had to do with PMS and cinnamon rolls. :D This might be payback time.

[LostinVA]

54. You mean

A "choad."

Good point... hmmmm.....

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

44. I can read this, you know

[gmoney]

45. what kind of cheap knife can't be washed?

:hide:

You could always place something of equal value of hers in the dishwasher (don't run it, just let her find it there)

[ScreamingMeemie]

48. Why are you even wasting the time to post this?

:shrug:

[DS1]

49. what kind of chickenshit knife can't handle a decent wash now and then?

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

51. Apparently, her precious chickenshit knives

I will use my knives from now on. They're actually nicer than hers.

[DS1]

56. My fancy Global snapped in two while I was hand washing it

To hell with that action.

[SOteric]

59. You're officially on notice not to touch my knives.

Kaythanxbai.

[DS1]

63. .

[LostinVA]

71. *gasp*

[ScreamingMeemie]

92. Look at it as a "Get out of Loading the Dishwasher Free" card...

You can now tell her you are way too afraid to mess something up. :hi:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

94. Good point

She always bitches about always having to unload the dishwasher. Honestly, I've never seen her do it.

[crimsonblue]

57. most knives can be washed in the dish washer

even if they say otherwise.

[Tektonik]

58. Not ones that are semi decent

Dishwasher detergent can be abrasive, and the jets from a dishwasher will make any chef's knife move around and clank with other utensils, plates and such. Hell the plastic from the dishwasher cages will dull a knife.

Do you own Cutco knives?

[crimsonblue]

67. No i don't, you patronizing ass.

From my experience, dish detergent is no more abrasive on my imported german knives than is dish detergent and a scrub brush. Also, complaining about "dulling" knives is a dumb argument, because a simple solution is routine sharpening. Or did your Cutco knives not come with a sharpener with instructions?

[Tektonik]

68. .

:rofl:

Japanese are better

[crimsonblue]

82. it's a matter of preference, really.

Knive snobbery is pathetic, as are you.

[Shakespeare]

100. It's not about dulling the knives. The extreme heat in the dishwasher WILL fuck up the handle/tang.

And that's why they never, EVER go in the dishwasher.

[Debi]

60. Only if I can kick Mr. Debi to the curb

for accidentially throwing away the gift box full of Lancome Lip glosses my mother gave me for Christmas last year. "I thought it was just an empty box".....Look inside next time buddy :eyes:

http://www.thebeautyoflifeblog.com/2007/11/holiday-gifts-lancome-juicy-tubes.html

[Richardo]

65. I threw away a pair of Oakley sunglasses Mrs R got from ebay

The box felt empty :shrug: THAT was an expensive mistake.

[Debi]

72. Yep...always check the box!

:cry:

[LostinVA]

73. Wait -- I thought you "dropped him off" in the woods???

[Debi]

76. Someone gave him a ride home....

Guess that gun worked for something now didn't it?

[Jamastiene]

61. Is the knife technically dishwasher safe?

If so, then she was just cleaning it for you. Is the knife still safe? I need more details about whether the knife is dishwasher safe. It didn't ruin the knife, did it?

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

66. Yes

And, I put it in blade up.

[Tektonik]

74. Did you put it in a slot with other utensils nearby?

:o

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

78. Some silicon spatulas

[Tektonik]

85. You may be safe

Look at the blade in the light, are there any nicks in it. If so, this may have to be Lost's next present:

http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/cu117/index.cfm?pkey=cknives-michel-bras

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

86. Yeah, like I'm replacing her precious $45 knife with that

If she bought me a Playstation 3 for my birthday, then maybe.

[Tektonik]

88. C'mon it's only slightly less expensive than a Margaritaville

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

90. We already have a Margaritaville -- it was a wedding shower gift

And they only cost about $300.

[Tektonik]

91. The only things I regret not buying at my last job were a Beertender and a Margaritaville

When the LNT I worked at was closing I sooo wanted to stash a Beertender. :(

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

93. I want a Beertender, too

I am not allowed to have one.

"We need kitchen floors...blah, blah, blah."

What's wrong with the sub-floor?

[Tektonik]

95. I almost bought one at 60% off

But, I waited another week to see if I could get it at 75% off.

[Jamastiene]

107. Gosh, you poor thing.

:hug:

I hope I don't get married then find out later that I married a Kitchen Nazi.

:hide:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

108. She wasn't like this until we got good stuff

[Jamastiene]

109. Poor baby.

:hug:

At least she can't stab now that you've rendered her knife unfit.

:hide:

[LostinVA]

79. No

[Jamastiene]

101. Hmm...what a conundrum.

One of you says yes and the other says no. What to do? What to do?

Can the knife be sharpened? All my knives in my collection are made of steel and other metals. I have no clue about the fancy nonmetal knives. Are they really good?

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

102. It's a steel knife, it can be sharpened

[Shakespeare]

104. See my post above. It's not about dulling.

The heat in the dishwasher will ruin the handle/knife tang bond, whether it's adhesive or rivets.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

110. You're just saying these things because you have a girl crush on my wife

[Shakespeare]

112. No, that's an entirely different matter. I've gone all Joan Crawford on Gordon for the knife thing.

Correlation not equal to causation. :P

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

113. He's the man, he has every right to put it in the dishwasher

:hide:

[Shakespeare]

114. Such a statement makes Gordon laugh...

...very nervously.

[GentryDixon]

70. I've got her beat.

My cat, whom my husband hated, knocked my dog's ashes off the fireplace mantle minutes before leaving for work. It broke the granite on the hearth, but not the vase, only knocked the lid off. I put the vase in microwave and left for work so I could fix it later. Well, I forgot poor Misha was in the microwave. My husband found her the next morning when he needed to warm his coffee. I had to fess up to the broken hearth and well as the fact the dreaded Marty Cat did the dirty deed.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

80. Eww, who warms coffee in the microwave?

Only make enough to drink and then make more later. To do otherwise, is degrading to the coffee bean.

[Debi]

81. What? You wanna piss everyone on DU off today?

:shrug:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

84. Why should today be any different than other days?

:shrug:

[GentryDixon]

83. My husband is a freak about scalding coffee.

I even boil water to put in his cup before he pours, but if it doesn't take the first layer of his tongue, it is not hot enough. Go figure.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

You're also not supposed to make coffee at a boiling temperature

The man needs to learn these things, and coffee MUST be made in a French press, using water JUST about to boil. Let it sit for 4 minutes EXACTLY, press and pour.

[GentryDixon]

89. I actually have a french press.

I use it when he is not here.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

87. You're also not supposed to make coffee at a boiling temperature

The man needs to learn these things, and coffee MUST be made in a French press, using water JUST about to boil. Let it sit for 4 minutes EXACTLY, press and pour.

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

96. I nuke coffee

It warms it up. Degrading to the coffee bean? You mean, more degrading than being picked, dried, roasted, and ground up? What a thing to do to a coffee bean!

It's a cup of coffee. Java. Starter fluid.

:hi:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

97. It totally ruins the taste

I'm not spending $12-15/lb to ruin it.

[driver8]

98. Kick her ass to the curb...

I did not know you had Border Collies!! We used to have a Border Collie named Cody, but he passed away almost 4 years ago. We miss him very much.

Would love to see a photo of your BC's!

[Deep13]

99. There has to be SOME way to reach an accomodation.

My wife has a pricey chef knife. I use the Cutco stuff. Maybe get her a stainless steel model for just whatever and agree to hands off your knife. It's important for H. to realize that this is not just about stuff. It is about the apparent disregard for your feelings in this matter.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

103. Pfft, it was a wedding gift for BOTH of us

It's going in the dishwasher.

[Deep13]

105. Why? nt

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

106. Because I said so, and I'm the man

Mostly just because I stood on the "groom's side," but still.

[Debi]

117. You can't be the 'Trophy Wife' and 'The Man'

You're so Indigo.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

118. Oh trust me, I can be the man

:evilgrin:

[Debi]

121. Oh MY!!

:spray:

[SacredCow]

111. I gave my s/o one helluva lecture....

when he used one of my Sabatiers on a ceramic plate.

Dishwashers are bad news for knives other than table and butter. I'd say an ass-whuppin is in order.

[LanternWaste]

115. Upon deep reflection and much soul searching...

Upon deep reflection and much soul searching, I'm scared even thinking about knives in your hands...

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

119. You should be, she's a total klutz

[LostinVA]

122. I thought you were my pal!

:cry:

[LanternWaste]

124. Of course I am...

Of course I am... I care so deeply about your health and and so committed to your well being that I have decided to remove all sharp objects from your house.

Henceforth, you and Haruka will be left with no more than those little stubby-ended, second-grade scissors (your choice for the color as my generosity knows no bounds...)

And from what I hear, I better send you my E.R. Christmas coupons-- four visits and the fifth one's free :)

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

126. Honestly, one of the best pairs of scissors I ever had was a blue crayola pair

I think my fucking sister took them when she went to college.

[peacefreak]

116. Well, she is a trophy wife,

so you might be expecting too much from her. I would buy her a set of ginsu knives & hide the real object of your affection.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

120. I already have a very nice set of German knives inherited from my dad

He had gone to cooking school, and they were his knives from that.

[peacefreak]

123. Do you put those in the dishwasher?

:evilgrin:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

125. Are you kidding me? I inherited them from my dad

They've never seen a dishwasher, mostly because we never had one growing up, probably.

[Wetzelbill]

127. I'd stick with her just on looks alone

I mean honestly, you don't keep her around for her ability to do housework. :evilgrin:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

128. Actually, if you ignore the knife in the dishwasher, I'd make an awesome housewife

When I do clean, I'm VERY OCD about it (thanks Mom!) and I'm also handy with power tools.

[Wetzelbill]

129. ok I'm sold

:)

[cboy4]

130. You and your knives

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

132. That's the knife I put in the dishwasher!

As you can see, it's her favorite.

[cboy4]

133. I figured that was the one.

And how the hell did you get a "GOOD DUER" heart.

:rofl:

That's rich.

HA!

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

134. I am good

People just don't understand me, because I'm Indigo.

[LostinVA]

135. NOW you know why I'm so damned pissed!

[Skittles]

131. you and Haruka both need your asses kicked

seriously

[LostinVA]

136. Are you volunteering?

[Skittles]

137. any time, babes

anytime :hi:

[Parche]

138. Haruuuuuuuuuuuuuu uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuka Is In Trouble

:hide:

i would spank her and send her to her room with no dinner

:woohoo: :hi: :hug: