The BlueIris Semi-Nightly Poetry Break, 7/19/09

[BlueIris]

"What Do I Know"

Only how darkness
grows less beyond
this narrow window,
how the sky fills
with a circle of swallows
who have belled the wind,
with their wingbeats
guided its direction.

The fog nourishes the fir ridge,
the deer wakes and feeds
in its cave of blackberry vines.
The kitchen clock ticks its minutes,
I hear the slow minuet of breath
easing out of my skin
and I keep on with what I know,
watching from this couch.

The way weather suddenly
appears on the ridge,
how words float to the page
like leaf shreds given over
to the creek flow.

~Stephanie Van Horn

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. My dear BlueIris!

This is lovely, so full of great imagery!

I want to write like this when I grow up...

Thank you...

:hi:

[Tuesday Afternoon]

2. you already do...

matter of fact I was thinking as I read this how much it sounded like one of yours.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

3. My dear Tuesday Afternoon...

Wow, sweetie...

Thank you...

Mine are not this polished...

:hug:

[Tuesday Afternoon]

4. I really don't know what that means...polished.

if you would have said that this one is more wordy, that I would agree.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

5. This one is more wordy.

What I mean by polished is this poem seems to flow better, better imagery, like that.

My poems aren't as good as this poem...yet.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

6. that determination is out of my league

I honestly don't see any diffrence in this and what you offer except this one is more wordy. Maybe, BlueIris can explain it. The "flow" to this one is no different (to me) than the way one of your flows. In fact, that is one of the reasons this one reminded me of your stuff.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

7. I thank you!

I appreciate it...

:hug:

[BlueIris]

8. It does remind one of C-Peg's work, doesn't it? nt