JimGinPA
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Wed Dec-02-09 12:55 AM
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The Police Kicked In The Door And Found My Mother Dead Yesterday |
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Apparently she had a heart attack several days ago and died on her living room floor. Her poor little Chihuahua was tramatized and emaciated, hiding under her bed.
She had become estranged from my family. She had had bitter fights with two of my sisters who lived near her and had not spoken to them for more than ten years and she had an argument over the phone with my sister in California a couple years ago and they stopped speaking after that too. My Niece was visting home a couple years ago and took her new baby to visit and my Mom wouldn't answer the door.
I haven't spoken to her in over five years myself. I didn't have a fight with her or anything, one day I called and she had changed her number to an unlisted private number. I sent her a card a few days later and it came back "Return to Sender". That was it - no explanation, she just cut herself off from me as well. I believe it was probably because I wouldn't "take sides" against my sisters in her feuds.
I loved my Mom but there was a lot of "crazy" involved with her. It's sad that she died alone, but then she made the life choices that brought that about.
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XemaSab
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Wed Dec-02-09 12:59 AM
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We've had similar conflicts in my family, so I respect your opinion of the situation. :(
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NYC_SKP
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Wed Dec-02-09 01:00 AM
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2. I'm sorry for your loss and for the brokeness of your family. |
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That family stuff is painful.
:grouphug:
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phasma ex machina
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Wed Dec-02-09 01:12 AM
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3. Sorry to hear about your loss. My condolences. nt |
bluesbassman
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Wed Dec-02-09 01:18 AM
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It sounds like she had a lot of pain in her life. She's free of that now. I wish the best for you and your sisters.
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Iggo
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Wed Dec-02-09 01:33 AM
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5. Aw, that's too bad Jim. |
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Sorry to hear it.
Remember the good times.
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Skittles
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Wed Dec-02-09 01:34 AM
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CaliforniaPeggy
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Wed Dec-02-09 02:18 AM
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7. I'm so sorry to hear this... |
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I hope she didn't suffer...
May your love of her carry you through this traumatic time...
:hug:
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Suich
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Wed Dec-02-09 02:55 AM
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You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
:hug:
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Drunken Irishman
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Wed Dec-02-09 03:01 AM
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9. I hope you've found peace, Jim. And I hope she did before her death. |
SeattleGirl
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Wed Dec-02-09 03:08 AM
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She did make her choices, but those of us left still have to reconcile those choices.
I wish you peace and comfort.
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onestepforward
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Wed Dec-02-09 05:07 AM
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11. Sending my condolences |
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and comforting vibes your way. :hug:
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Maraya1969
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Wed Dec-02-09 05:49 AM
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theNotoriousP.I.G.
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Wed Dec-02-09 07:09 AM
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13. I'm sorry for you loss |
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Jim. What a sad way to die, all alone and estranged from her children. I hope she is in peace now.
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Vidar
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Wed Dec-02-09 07:22 AM
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14. My condolences. A sad way to go. |
Blue Diadem
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Wed Dec-02-09 07:37 AM
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:hug: for you and your family.
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txwhitedove
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Wed Dec-02-09 07:59 AM
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16. Peace and good wishes to your family. |
JohnnyLib2
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Wed Dec-02-09 08:10 AM
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17. I'm very sorry to hear this. |
GoCubsGo
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Wed Dec-02-09 08:45 AM
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My aunt was like that, too. She got mad at my dad (her brother) over some silliness, and disowned everyone except my older sister and niece. And, when I say "everyone", that includes my cousins, her sister and other brother, and any spouses. She died alone, too, only in a nursing home. It's sad, but she did me a favor. When I get mad at my siblings, I think of her, and remind myself of what could become of us. I won't let it happen.
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Deep13
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Wed Dec-02-09 08:53 AM
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19. I'm sorry to hear it. |
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My mother is in the process of making sure she dies alone. I feel bad about it because I know her personality disorder is not her fault. Still, my sister and I needed to get off the crazy train since the thing that makes her intolerable also prevents her from doing anything about it. A lose-lose situation regardless of what we do.:-(
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MorningGlow
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Wed Dec-02-09 08:56 AM
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20. So sorry to hear that |
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Hoping your mom will now find peace. You and your family as well, Jim. :hug:
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peekaloo
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Wed Dec-02-09 09:07 AM
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Bossy Monkey
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Wed Dec-02-09 09:08 AM
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22. So sorry. All condolences to you and your sisters. Hope the dog's all right. n/t |
LiberalEsto
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Wed Dec-02-09 09:28 AM
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23. Sending you healing light |
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What a sad situation.
I wonder if she had mini-strokes years ago, because I've read that these can lead to dramatic personality change. Or perhaps she had Alzheimer's.
:hug:
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Condem
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Wed Dec-02-09 09:34 AM
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Ishoutandscream2
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Wed Dec-02-09 09:40 AM
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25. God, Jim, how awful. I am so sorry |
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And being the dog lover that I am, I am so sorry for her little Chiuauhua as well. How awful. Please take care of yourself.
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tigereye
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Wed Dec-02-09 09:58 AM
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26. that is sad, I am so sorry |
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how sad for someone to be so isolated and alone, regardless of the reasons...
:hug:
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SoxFan
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Wed Dec-02-09 10:15 AM
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27. Thoughts and prayers for you, JimGinPA |
Call Me Wesley
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Wed Dec-02-09 11:31 AM
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28. Safe passage to your mom. |
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May her suffering be over. Peace and comfort to you and yours.
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livetohike
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Wed Dec-02-09 11:37 AM
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29. My sympathy to you and your family Jim |
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:hug: We have a similar situation with estranged siblings on my husband's side, so I sympathize with your situation. I hope the memories of better times with your Mom will help ease the sadness.
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GreenPartyVoter
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Wed Dec-02-09 11:39 AM
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30. I am so sorry, both for her death and for the relationship she chose not to have with you. *hugs* |
havocmom
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Wed Dec-02-09 01:22 PM
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and hoping you have no regrets. When a parent won't be civil, it is trying at the very least. Hoping you do not feel responsible for her choices.
hm
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kentauros
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Wed Dec-02-09 01:26 PM
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32. Aww man, I'm so sorry, Jim |
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I have no words other than my condolences and :hug: Take care now.
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av8rdave
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Wed Dec-02-09 01:33 PM
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33. Sorry for you loss and for the circumstances |
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RIP to your mom. Best wishes to you and yours.
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Rosie1223
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Wed Dec-02-09 01:37 PM
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She is now at peace and hopefully you and your family can find some as well.
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JNelson6563
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Wed Dec-02-09 01:51 PM
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I've been estranged from my own mom for about 15 years now. Nothing but a source of grief to me. Still, no one should die alone.
Hugs and encouragement to you and yours, Julie
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MissMarple
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Wed Dec-02-09 05:11 PM
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36. I am so sorry, sweetheart. |
Odin2005
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Wed Dec-02-09 05:57 PM
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hippywife
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Wed Dec-02-09 06:34 PM
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38. JimGinPA, I am so sorry that |
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this has been added to your sadness surrounding your mother and her history. Even if you were estranged, I'm sure this news wasn't met without emotion on your part. I'm sorry she suffered and consequently led her family to suffer, too.
:hug:
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hedgehog
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Wed Dec-02-09 06:35 PM
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39. I'm sorry for your trouble. |
Noseyaboutpollution
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Wed Dec-02-09 06:36 PM
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foxfeet
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Wed Dec-02-09 06:38 PM
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41. I'm so sorry. I wish peace and strength for you and yours. |
applegrove
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Wed Dec-02-09 10:12 PM
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emilyg
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Wed Dec-02-09 11:58 PM
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43. So sad. I am so sorry. |
donheld
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Thu Dec-03-09 12:02 AM
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UrbScotty
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Thu Dec-03-09 12:13 AM
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45. I am so, so sorry to hear this, Jim. |
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I don't know what to say.
I hope a hug will help.
:hug:
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Rhiannon12866
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Thu Dec-03-09 12:26 AM
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46. I am so very sorry, both for the loss and the shock. |
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It must be very tough on you, despite the rifts in your family, or maybe because of them. :hug:
And I hope that the poor little dog is going to be okay. :-(
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question everything
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Thu Dec-03-09 01:06 AM
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47. So sorry for you loss |
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Too bad no one could take her to a complete physical to see whether medical problems caused her bizarre behavior. I hope that you have some happier memories of her.
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