Holy crap, Carrie Underwood sings like a thousand badgers stuck in a sack of shit.

[Rabrrrrrr]

:puke:

How did she ever get to be so popular?

Oh, that's right - because she sucks. America loves "musicians" who suck.

She gets a fucking holiday special (that I am accidentally forced to watch for the moment because normally at this time FOX is playing legitimate entertainment), and a thousand actual musicians suffer in obscurity because they actually know what they're doing.

My God. Her vowels are awful, she's full of cliche portamentos and melismas, and her music is fucking awful.

Someone shut her the fuck up.

And as soon as I am done typing this, I'm changing the channel off this illegitimate shitstain and putting on something that has artistic merit.

Fucking hell.

Seriously.

[mix]

1. I could not agree more.

I watched a concert of hers on CMT recently, wretched. She's a robot.

[Rabrrrrrr]

2. Yes - very robotic and mechanical, like she can't do anything except that a group of demographers

told her what her target audience likes.

"They love it if, as the notes go up, you bring the microphone up with your hand."

"Ok"

"And then your demographic loves it if, on a long note, you tilt your head back"

"Ok"

and so on.

:puke:

wretched.

Now she's doing some kind of skit and she acts like those thousand badgers in the sack of shit, except that they've suffocated and are now being eaten by maggots.

[kayakjohnny]

3. Well then, I'm guessing you'll not be invited as a presenter

at the next awards show.

However, there are probably at least a few magazines who might want you to do a review.

Keep the phone handy, mate.

[nytemare]

4. I would like to add Beyonce, Mariah Carey and Rihanna to your list

Empty vocal gymnastics.

I enjoy many artists who suffer in relative obscurity, like Nikka Costa, who is a modern mix between Joplin and Raitt, and the downbeat Zero 7.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DlUHIiTwBzQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=INn1C6ImJKg

It kills me that I have to listen to bullshit every day at work, the same 8 or so songs repeated once an hour, none of which show any musical talent, nor do they have any soul nor atmosphere to the music.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

5. Does she suck as spectacularly as Celine Dion?

[mix]

6. give her time nt

[Orrex]

7. Yeah! And she isn't "real" science fiction, either!

[Skittles]

8. she's a fucking contest winner

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

9. Winning a fucking contest sounds like a good thing.

You would probably become very popular.

[mix]

11. lol

[LynneSin]

10. This should cheer you up!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KANI2dpXLw

[Fridays Child]

12. That was a double plus un-nice thing to say.

But since I've never heard her sing, I can't say you're wrong.

[Amerigo Vespucci]

13. This thread is useless without a wedgie

15 more photos: http://thesuperficial.com/2009/12/carrie_underwood_in_a_bikini.php

[deucemagnet]

17. Holy cameltoe, Batman!

:wow:

[Odin2005]

14. I like her music.

:shrug:

[madrchsod]

15. yup....she`s bad.

[Initech]

16. That variety special that Fox has been pimping looks atrocious.

[LostInAnomie]

18. I'd like to have sex with her.

If that were possible, I would listen to her music in exchange.

[MilesColtrane]

19. But, not surely not beforehand.

That would be the equivalent of thwacking your erection with a cold ladle.

[Lucian]

20. I like Kelly Clarkson more than Carrie Underwood.

Carrie is just awful.