Am I wrong to be so upset? (Professional situation)

[crispini]

I am a member of a local professional organization. I've supported this organization over the last three year with my dollars and my time; I've attended meetings and occasionally volunteered.

My technical specialty is rather obscure. Last fall I spoke to the head of our organization and volunteered to speak on this topic, as nobody had spoken on this topic recently. He accepted and I spent some time (not much, but some) on slides for my presentation. I didn't hear from him again and so I contacted him in January to find out more details. He said that perhaps I could speak at the next meeting if I could find a place. We chatted about it some, and I made some suggestions, and he said he would look into some things. Again, it was left open.

Then last week I get an email saying that our upcoming meeting was scheduled for the end of the month and there would be two of my peers speaking on a topic which is very similar to mine. And then today I get the preview of the speaker's list of an upcoming conference and again, a DIFFERENT two speakers are scheduled. I'm all like -- what the hell am I? Chopped liver?

So my question to you guys is--
1) Am I right to be so upset?
2) Should I say something to this guy about it?

[rug]

1. Are we going to end up reading about you in the newspaper?

:scared:

[crispini]

2. Ahahaha. No.

I'm a big girl and I'm not gonna go postal on anyone. Hee hee. :P I'm just annoyed because, frankly, I was very excited about this opportunity and I feel like someone's taken away my toy. Hahaha!

[soleft]

3. Of course you're not wrong to feel upset - you're disappointed.

Even if the reasons for picking the other people had to do with logistics that have absolutely nothing to do with you, I think I still have an emotional reaction.

How often do you meet? It may be an issue of differing needs - your leader is content to leave things loose and open, it sounds like you need something more definitive.

Maybe just say it's something you feel very enthusiastic about, - is there some issue why he wouldn't want you to make a presentation and then go from there and see if he can give you a definite date.

[crispini]

4. It's actually pretty structured - dates are announced a month or two in advance.

And he's already asked these other folks and the dates have been announced. So it's quite the done deal that I won't be speaking on this topic this year at least.

Thanks for the validation :hug: I guess I really had my hopes up -- I have long wanted to try to move my "career field" up a notch by something such as speaking, or writing articles, and I was hoping that this would open the door a bit. To be honest I'm actually a bit surprised by how disappointed I am. I suppose I'll just have to figure out some way of doing this on my own, such as finally getting my own website up or something like that.

[soleft]

5. Or start with a simple blog to just get your stuff out there

My partner has a blog and my son is starting up a website to promote a short movie that he made. Best of luck!

:thumbsup:

[Demoiselle]

6. I like the suggestion that you ask about this and try to find out what happened...

Perhaps the "scheduler" in question is simply less that well organized or careless...but you should certainly ask what's going on? You were surprised and somewhat disappointed, I don't see any reason not to share those feelings...

[petronius]

7. I'd be a bit ticked, and I'd ask for an explanation

Public presentations are nice networking opportunities and CV entries; if you have the knowledge and you were first in line, you deserve(d) the gig...

[travelingtypist]

8. Don't assume anything.

The guy doesn't sound from what you say that he's the best at organization and keeping track of things. Broach the subject casually. You can tell how much he sputters or whether he gets defensive all you need to know. If he's apologetic, give him the chance to make it up to you. If he's defensive, dropkick him.

[gimama]

9. 2 thoughts on this for You..

I like the idea of asking the scheduler,
not in a confrontational way,
but just as You laid it out here..

But maybe this is the way it *had* to work out,
so that YOU would realize how important it is to YOU,
that YOU step out of Your 'comfort zone'
with Your public speaking & writing.
Maybe it was the Universe working,
to push You out of the nest,
so You'll spread Your wings & fly!
YEA, YOU! Goood luck!:hi: