What is it about baggage claim that make people think "NOW I will be a rude fricking asshole!"

[trof]

Thanks to Lynnesin for the inspiration.
:hi:

Looks folks, here are the rules for airline baggage claim.

1. DO NOT stand right beside the conveyor, breathlessly awaiting your bag.
You're blocking the view and access of the people behind you.
Also it's not true that the closer you stand the sooner your bag will come out.
That's an old wive's tale (Apologies to old wives. I HAVE an old wife. Don't get your knickers in a twist.) and has been debunked on snopes.
http://www.snopes.com/


2. Stand AT LEAST 5 feet back from the edge of the conveyor.
This accomplishes two things.
It expands the circumference of space around the conveyor allowing more travelers to be in the 'front row'.
It also allows others behind you to better view bags on the conveyor and get to them.
They should paint a yellow line on the floor 5 feet from the edge of the conveyor with the stencil "Please stand behind this line until your luggage is actually in view."
Like banks.

3. If you have more than one piece of luggage and they aren't on the conveyor together, grab the first one and place it behind the perimeter of the five foot circumference.
Trust me, in this short amount of time no one will abscond with your first bag.
Wait your turn for subsequent bags.

4. Throwing elbows, tripping, or otherwise hindering or injuring fellow passenger is NOT acceptable under ANY circumstance.
That's just rude.

Thank you.
:-)

[Rabrrrrrr]

1. I have for decades wondered why people don't realize that a larger perimiter would be easier.

It's such a SIMPLE FUCKING CONCEPT!!!

Fucking hell, people - adding another 5 feet to the radius of the circle of people around the conveyor belt will let DOUBLE the people have easy, quick, ready no-hassle access to their bags, in a way that they don't have to slam it into people when they lift it off, or shove people out of the way.

IT'S JUST GODDAMN SIMPLE MATH YOU FUCKSTAINS!!!!!!

Plus, it's also just plain old MORE FUCKING COURTEOUS!

[trof]

2. Thanks for doing the math.

Geometry wasn't one of my strong points.
:-)

[pink-o]

3. Dudes, I work at SFO. It isn't just the baggage carousel.

I think there's something in the air that turns perfectly nice and well-mannered people into self-absorbed pigs who will cut right in front of you, run over your toes with their rolly bags and talk at 3000 decibels into their cell phone about their crappy lives and info only their closest friends or proctologists should be hearing! Getting on board an airplane, they try to get me to take their boarding passes from their mouths, cuz their hands are full. Yecch.

Not to mention the questions! There's a whole Facbook site for stupid questions from airline passengers. I've posted a stack of 'em myself.


One day, someone's gonna be paid a fat grant to study why reasonable people lose their minds the minute they go through the automatic glass doors of an airport!
:shrug: :shrug: :shrug:

[Gormy Cuss]

7. What's wrong with holding my boarding pass in my mouth?

:rofl:
That's disgusting.

I think the advent of TSA/enhanced screening, fewer open seats on flights and fees for checking bags have made people much crankier in airports these days.

[trof]

9. Oh hell, I GET to the airport cranky.

And then it gets worse.
Flying. Sux.
EOM
:-(

[trof]

8. OK, I know you're a gate agent.

That's become one of the worst and most thankless jobs in the world.
I was a pilot for TWA for 30+ years.
I saw first hand what you have to deal with.

Let me guess.
Are you now 'part-time'?
So they don't have to give you benefits?
:-(

[pink-o]

22. No, I'm Union so they haven't been able to do that yet.

I've also been with this airline for 19 years, so although they would like me to leave so they can save the *****MASSIVE**** wage they pay me :sarcasm: and give a third of it to a younger employee, their hands are tied. Good thing I know how to live within my means, and I'm not tired of traveling yet!

Also, a lot of people tell me they wouldn't want my job, but angry people don't frighten me. (I'm a 6'1" chick runner, so maybe they don't wanna threaten me!) Far more stressful for me would be a job where I'm stuck in a cubicle, and the work I don't finish on Monday is waiting for me on Tuesday. I forget all about work the minute I clock out and start planning my next trip! I'd hate to take my job home with me.

[trof]

24. Good on ya'!

Glad you're at least in a union.
Yeah, I'm sure your salary is 'massive'.
Not.
:-(

I just got an email that said United employees can no longer travel in first class on a pass.
Don't know if it's true or not.
Heard anything?

[pink-o]

28. I haven't heard that....

But it would not surprise me. SFO is a big hub for UA, and I can tell ya, the employees there are totally demoralized. I get some of their passengers at my counter, and they're all ranting about how mistreated they are. Too bad if it is true: it doesn't take much for the bosses to throw a few crumbs our way, and most of us do this job for the travel privileges. Why mess with that and your employees' morale?

[blueamy66]

20. Hey...my Dad worked for AA for over 40 years...

was a gate agent and then a supervisor.

Back in the day.....you'd be amazed at what they got away with saying. PC wasn't around back then.

I used to laugh when I watched him herding the cattle onto the plane....

[Haole Girl]

4. This is how it played out when I was traveling alone to Florida....

I checked a bag. Mainly because I thought I was staying 5 days and would not have access to a washing machine. Also, because I am not one of those women who expects anyone else to help her get an over-stuffed & exceedingly-heavy carry-on into the overhead bin (but that is another story).

So, I'm standing at the baggage claim area, about 5 feet from the conveyor, waiting for my bag, when a huge moran of a man steps right in front of me. He was over 6' tall... I am only 5'1" tall. I was in no mood for it. I said in a loud and obnoxious voice (pretty deep for my size, too) "DO NOT STAND IN FRONT OF ME!!!" The jerk gave me a quick look, sort of sized up the madness in my expression, and then moved to the side of me.

Now that I wrote that out, I realize how funny it is/was.

:rofl:

[trof]

5. I admire yer spunk.

Truly I do.
Go gettum.
;-)

[hippywife]

6. Awesome!

:rofl:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

10. My dear Haole Girl!

You go, girl!

That is fucking perfect!

:rofl:

[Haole Girl]

12. HA! I made CaliforniaPeggy drop the F-bomb!

:hi:

I was in a hurry to get to the hospital before visiting hours were over. As it turned out, I almost broke a knuckle knocking on a glass door so hard before someone opened it. My Dad said, "You could have gone in through the ER." Yeah, that would have been interesting...

:crazy:

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

19. Bah! Cal Peg drops F-bombs like a longshoreman

but she has a nice smile, and her poetry is better than Vogons'.



:hi:

edit to add: that's a picture of a Vogon poetry reading. Captive audience.

[trof]

26. She WAS a longshore(wo)man.

I'm pretty sure.
;-)

[Aristus]

13. It's the sweet-looking lil tiny women that you have to watch out for...

:P

Way to tell him off, HG!

[Haole Girl]

14. omg

I can't win, either way, if I respond to that.

:P

[AsahinaKimi]

18. haha..

I know the feeling..I am little too.

[mwdem]

16. I can so see you doing that!

Me, I'm a wimp when it comes to these situations. And you know I so could be obnoxious and commanding if I wanted to...

[Kali]

11. they all seem to be in such a hurry to get out into road traffic

why?

[BlueJazz]

15. That's one of my pet peeves. I want to holler: Didn't any of you idiots take science or logic in...

...school or in life? :)

[petronius]

17. That yellow line is a good idea! I always wait a few feet back, but if some rude person

has stepped in front of and my bag arrives first, they get stomped - eye for an eye and all that...

[wickerwoman]

30. Ditto.

My pet peeve is when I'm struggling with a huge heavy bag and bunch of big guys have to stand *right* in the way as I'm being dragged around the carousel towards them. I've never gotten a single offer of help, but I have aimed for the balls a few times.

[Patiod]

21. I don't check my bag.

I can fit an entire week's wardrobe into a regulation-size carry-on.

It does help that I'm 6' and work out. Women who are smaller than me ARE at a disadvantage when it comes to overhead storage.

The only time I do check my bag is when I'm traveling with my weight-lifter SO, and we have a system that works - he grabs the bags and hands them off to me. (He also offers to grabs bags for anyone who seems to need assistance - when they see me with him, they usually realize he's not a masher and let him)

[pink-o]

29. Hah! That sounds like me.

Albeit, I'm a woman of the same height. And an airline employee, so when we travel, we want to keep our stuff with us in case we end up on a totally different flight. So I have mastered the art of packing everything into a 22 inch roller bag.

I call it "packing with both sides of your brain" but the method actually works for everything in life! Here's how you do it:

1) Put your carry-on size suitcase on your bed.

2) Without restraint, pull everything from your closet you want to take on this trip. You're not worried about space, size, amount or anything at this point, just throw it all on the bed, go by impulse alone (right-brain)

3)Once your bed is piled high with clothes, shoes, electronics, et al, this is where the left-brained part comes in. You take away all the extraneous stuff. Be brutal. Have it in the back of your mind that you can buy what you don't have and you probably want to go shopping anyway. Match clothes as separates, so you can make a few different outfits with just 3 pieces. I have a black dress and a few scarves and cartigans, also some jewellery to dress it up. Couple pair of jeans (boot and skinny) 2 pairs of shoes, some yoga pants (which can be for the gym or paired with a nice top to wear around town) Toiletries are travel size only, since TSA won't let you go thru security with anything more. Don't bring a big bottle of your favorite shampoo--in fact, most hotels have soap and shampoo and a hair dryer in the room. The rule is: everything you bring must now fit inside the 22" carry on or your very large purse/man bag/briefcase. You can do it, really.

3) And those of you with kids, don't wanna hear about how much more you need to pack for them. Kids are little, their stuff doesn't take up that much room, and it's easy to wash in a hotel sink and will dry in a day. As for toys and games, most of them are small enough to fit on a screen these days. Or you could use any of the electronic book apps on your own screen and read them a fun children's book. Families pay thru the nose for their luggage and they usually can afford it the least.

Also, eschew "Space Bags" or any other so-called way to save room in your suitcase. Roll up your clothes tightly. Stuff socks and underwear into your shoes, stick chargers into gaps left by your clothes. You'll be amazed at what you can fit!

I find that most people face traveling with some trepidation, so the massive amount of stuff they bring with them is kinda like a security blanket. We send people to Mexico every day for their beach vacations, and the huge steamer trunks of stuff they take when a bikini and flip-flops is gonna be the majority of their wardrobe just amazes me.

The other tip I have: bring at least one or two outfits you won't mind leaving behind. Cuz you're gonna go shopping, and probably need to sacrifice some stuff you brought from home. Don't be afraid to part with it.

Now, I just saved you and your family 20 dollars a bag. You're welcome!

[Xolodno]

23. I think it has something to do with...

being the end or beginning of a trip. After waiting at the airport (wait subject to possible delays), sitting on the plane, then trying to get to the carousel....you just want out. And everyone thinks "I was early/late, therefore my luggage should be near the beginning"...so they get right to the carousel...particularly where the luggage comes out. I know some probably get close because they worry they won't be able to get to their luggage due to other inconsiderate people blocking them....so it becomes a downward spiral.

What I usually end up doing, I go directly to the least populated section (where it will take the longest to get your luggage) take a spot and have my wife a few feet behind. When one of ours shows up, I grab it and give it to her to hold so we don't clutter up the area, when the next one comes, grab it and then I'm gone. If I see someone trying to reach for a bag that I'm near, I grab it and give it to them. I won't miss the extra 5 calories lost and it gets them out of the way quicker as well, if they can't reach it, they usually end up waiting for it to come around again but in closer proximately, making it harder for me to get my bag should it come around.

[trof]

25. Zackly! I think you broke the code.

:-)

[JBoy]

27. I like it when the six relatives coming to pick someone up also stand at the conveyor.

Like the extra six sets of eyes will make the bag come out faster.