Old friend's dad is very ill

[chromotone]

I've known this friend since 1967. We talked constantly on the phone until I moved away to college in 1972. Lost touch but renewed our friendship in 2007 and have been emailing each other since.

I was going to be in her "neck of the woods" attending a conference next week (we live about 1,600 miles apart) and we tentatively planned to meet for dinner. I just received an email today saying that her dad, who's been steadily declining in health for some time (he's now 90), has taken a turn for the worse. So much so she's staying at her parents' house. It doesn't look good. We canceled the dinner date.

I would like to do something. I thought about sending some flowers to her office as a gesture of "I'm thinking about you." I don't want to call because I think that would be a tad intrusive into her family's situation. She sounded so tired in her email. I do have a nagging feeling I'll be sending "a card" soon...

Any advice?

[LeftyFingerPop]

1. I think flowers would be good, along with a note...

wishing her and her dad the best, along with an offer to help her in any way you can (if you are in a position to do so).

[chromotone]

3. Thanks...

I thought so, too. :hi:

She and her brother have been trying to help their dad and mom (she's 88) for several months now, but he just keeps getting worse. He has fallen and her mom has had to call a neighbor to assist. Then my friend is called and she goes over to the house to see if he needs to be taken to the emergency room or urgent care. She's hired a private nurse, but there is still a lot of stress on her and her brother.

I think flowers and a note would be a nice way to say, "I'm thinking about you."

[LeftyFingerPop]

5. Also...

Food is always good during trying times. If you could somehow send some good wholesome pre-made food, that would save her from having to cook some meals. :hi:

[chromotone]

6. Didn't think of that!

I'll check around and see if I could send something. Thanks!

[CaliforniaPeggy]

2. I have found a website...

They have the most beautiful cards I have ever seen...

http://www.jacquielawson.com/

Safe passage to him...

I know she will be glad for your support during this difficult time.

:hug:

[chromotone]

4. Thank you, CaliforniaPeggy!

Those cards are indeed beautiful!

I think I'll send her a thought as I don't feel right about intruding on her family just now...

[tango-tee]

7. I believe that any kind gesture would be welcome.

But perhaps a card more than a call. A card she can read at her leisure, and won't have to deal with a conversation at a given moment during such a difficult time.

Your being there as a friend will always be remembered fondly. There is no doubt about that.

What a kind soul you are!

[chromotone]

8. I feel the same way...

...won't have to deal with a conversation at a given moment during such a difficult time.

Having lost both my parents, I remember flowers and cards tended to be more comforting than a phonecall. :hi:

[tango-tee]

9. Same here when I lost my dad.

Fond greetings back atcha from across the big pond! :hi:

[lukasahero]

10. Thanks for being so kind to your friend

Your instincts about calling are on target - that can be very difficult and add to the pressure rather than relieve it. Flowers, a card or a basket of prepared food (does a local grocery store deliver?) would all be very much appreciated in ways you'll never even know.