BREAKING: Joe the Mentally Unstable Racist Dipshit replaces Joe the Plumber on McCain Stump Circuit

[Amerigo Vespucci]

PHOENIX - McCain staffers announced the latest addition to Senator John McCain's bid for re-election, "Joe the Mentally Unstable Racist Dipshit." Replacing "Joe the Plumber" (Samuel Joseph Wurzelbacher), who's had a bit of a falling out with McCain since the 2008 election, the "new" Joe (Samuel Joseph Goebbels, an unemployed Burger King employee from Sedona), will join Senator McCain and former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin on the final stages of the "re-elect McCain" stump circuit.

McCain displayed a cheery enthusiasm for Joe: "He represents everything the Republican party stands for. He's dumb as a stump, hates anyone that's darker than the filling of a Hostess Twinkie, hasn't read a book since the fifth grade, loves Ronald Reagan, and smells like a combination of Aqua Velva, fast food burger grease, perspiration, and ass. Especially ass."

Samuel Joseph Wurzelbacher could not be reached for comment.



Above: Joe the Mentally Unstable Racist Dipshit poses with former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin in front of McCain Campaign Central in Flagstaff, AZ.

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