When A Young Woman Calls You Sweety, Hon, Et Cetera Should you Get Offended?

[DemocratSinceBirth]

It seems the older I get the less offended I get.

[tigereye]

1. I go back and forth - this is newer to me

Sometimes I want to say, I'm older than you, but not senile or infantile. Usually I just nod and smile.

[DemocratSinceBirth]

3. I'm In My Late Forties

I hope they don't think they are talking to their grandpa.

[tigereye]

18. when my dad was in the hospital recently, I was asked if I was his sister!

:scared: Yikes, didn't think I looked like I was 80! :rofl:

[Iggo]

2. I tell her to "Kiss mah grits!"

Seriously, though: It doesn't bother me.

[lunatica]

4. I take it the way it's meant which is rather nice of people who say such things

The first time I was addressed as Ma'am was a shock though. But I had to admit that it was meant as a respectful way of addressing me.

I think it's stupid to take offense at what people obviously say as a respectful and friendly gesture.

[DemocratSinceBirth]

5. I Will Never Forget The First Time I Was Called Sir

I must have been twenty or so and the person calling me sir was about twelve.

[lunatica]

6. Obviously you were, like, really OLD!

That's cute though. A well mannered 12 year old. Was that in the South by any chance? They're big on being polite and addressing people as Ma'am and Sir.

[DemocratSinceBirth]

12. In The South

We were taught to address all our elders are sirs and maams which wasn't such a bad thing.

[muffin1]

26. It is something that sticks with you, no?

About ten years ago, when I was in my late thirties, I was out shooting pool with my pals. I was wearing a cute outfit - skirt, leggings, nice top, etc. I thought I looked fabulous. Well, I was just standing there, waiting my turn, when a teenager at the next table indicated he needed me to move by saying, "Excuse me, MA'AM". Ewww - I was crestfallen. ;(

[Roon]

10. My nephew and his buddies call me sir

I kinda like it :-)

[Crystal Clarity]

14. Taking it in the way it was intended...

Is a good thing to remember...Most people mean well.

[Bucky]

7. Did you mean "offended" or "frisky"?

[Captain Hilts]

8. It's a southernism. It was NOT acceptable for Obama to address waitresses that way. nt

[timtom]

9. I'm reminded of the good old days, in paternalistic offices,

"Hey, sweet thing. How about making a pot of coffee for the rest of us?"
(Not always asked of a secretary)

[Beer Snob-50]

11. SEXIST ALERT! SEXIST ALERT!

it depends on the person who says it to me. a young cute thing it is fine, an older not so cute thing, not so fine.

[DemocratSinceBirth]

16. I'm Busted

The young woman had to be around twenty. I thougt it was kind of neat. The male ego needs flattering. But I wouldn't have minded it regardless of the person saying it.

[Beer Snob-50]

17. I love it myself

it does do wonders for ones ego.

A couple of weeks ago I was visiting some friends at the restaurant they own. While playing pool (with my wife watching from the side) a young lady started up a conversation with me while I was planning my shot. I am sure nothing would have come from it (my wife asked if the girl was wondering who my daughter was ) but it still did lots for my ego.

[Tommy_Carcetti]

13. If it's "hon" and you are from Baltimore, no.

Welcome to Balmer, hon!

[EOTE]

15. Yeah, I live in Baltimore. If I got offended every time someone called me 'hon'...

I'd probably live a fairly miserable existence. Even outside of the Balmer area, I think it's cute and sweet. I definitely wouldn't have a problem with it.

[yankeepants]

19. I find it condescending, presumptuous, and disrespectful

There I said it.

If the person who refers to me that way is someone that I will encounter more than once I very diplomatically tell them my name and that I prefer to be addressed by it

[edbermac]

20. Only if my wife is around.

:7

[applegrove]

21. I lived in a town where women called other women Hon. I thought it was endearing.

[kimi]

22. I'm a woman in my 40's

I call my female friends "Hon", "Sweetie" and such, and if I know a guy well enough, I call him the same.

Never thought it was something to take offense at. No one I've ever said anything like that to seemed to take offense.

Hmm, maybe I knock it off? It's been part of my nature since I don't know when. It would be a hard habit to break.

[SeattleGirl]

23. Not usually, as it's often said in a friendly way.

I've been called Honey, Sweetie, etc. by people (usually men) whose tone is definitely condescending, and I do NOT like that, and will tell them so on the spot. Other than those instances, though, it doesn't bother me.

[Kali]

24. Darlin'...

it don't bother me 'tall.:* :D

[murielm99]

25. Some people do that because it is easier than remembering

names. If that is the case, it is not flattering.

I used to work with someone we called "Beth-honey" behind her back. She called nearly everyone honey because she was too lazy to bother remembering their names. We could tell who was important or who was in management, because Beth-honey remembered those names just fine.

[Orrex]

27. A waitress tried to pull that shit on me a few months back

Naturally, I went to her manager and had her fired for it. And I made sure that she'd never work in this damn town ever again. With any luck, she'll be living on the street and gathering aluminum cans for a living.


That'll teach that snot-nosed little high school kid not to address me in a friendly, idiomatic fashion.

[MorningGlow]

28. Better that than "ma'am"

:scared:

Of course, a nice thick Southern accent of some sort really helps. My favorite greeting was from waitress in New Orleans, wearing a sleeveless biker t-shirt (and chewing gum, IIRC): "Wha-chew wawnt, baybay?"
:rofl:

[Jokerman]

29. I think that if anyone called me "Et Cetera", I'd get pissed.

Sorry, I just couldn't resist.

[Bossy Monkey]

30. It's only when they call me Sweaty Hun that it bothers me n/t

[Arugula Latte]

31. Better than Sweaty Buns

:hide:

[Swede]

32. Not at all.

nt

[yankeepants]

33. Got a pant load of that this AM

Our waitress first called my husband and I "guys" as in "What can I get you guys?" I am unmistakenly a woman. Then for the rest of the meal we were referred to intermittently as "guys", "sweetie","hun", or "honey". Personally, I find it disturbing.

[alarimer]

34. In an office setting it is very inappropriate.

If my boss or coworkers did it, it would bother me a lot.

But otherwise it isn't that big a deal.

[Book Lover]

35. Well, take this from the mouth of a former young cute thing, for what it's worth

I would only ever use it for an elder gentleman who I considered nice in a family/friend sort of way. If I thought an older man was hot (I do love me some silver/grey/white hair, I really do), I'd never use cutesy language, but be far more direct and to the point.

Of course, now that I'm middle-aged, men don't give a shit what I call them, and since I'm not stupid enough anymore to care about massaging the male ego, so I usually stick with hey you or Jack or asshole. Somehow, I don't get ignored when I use that kind of language.

[redqueen]

37. LOL

Best post in the thread :rofl:

[Shell Beau]

36. I can't imagine why this would offend anyone.

I guess it would depend on the tone, but it is in a sweet manor, I see nothing about it all offensive.

[Orrex]

38. I used to live in a sweet manor

Forty rooms and three indoor pools. Sweet indeed, hon!

[Shell Beau]

40. Oh hon, that is so awesome.

I had one of those myself sweetie.

[gmoney]

39. I'm told once upon a time...

If you were a woman in New York back in the day, bank tellers and sales clerks and waitstaff would always address you as "Miss", no matter if you were 98 years old with your great-grandchildren at your side.

However, if you were in Ohio, they would always call you "Ma'm" even if you were 16.

That may be total BS, but it was the only remotely interesting thing my wicked stepmother ever said to me. (Wonder what they did in NY when the woman was visibly pregnant... would "Miss" be an insult in that case?)

[stray cat]

41. Of course not - its regional

[Honeycombe8]

42. Some women (of all ages) call lots of others that. It's a habit, particularly in the south.

I'm a middle aged woman, and I've always hated that habit by other women. I find it fakey. They are following a tradition of trying to appear friendly and folksy and cutesy. But it doesn't work, IMO.

For one thing, if someone REALLY thinks someone is in authority over them in some way (like a parent, a cop, a teacher), they don't call THEM "Hon" or "Sweetie."

So it's clearly something they do with others they feel are probably on a lower level than they are. Like kids, younger folk, etc.

[Withywindle]

43. No, I wouldn't think so, why?

I call all sorts of people "hon" regardless of age or gender (yes, even my boss) if I'm in a good mood and they're nice to me. It's like an extra syllable that adds to the rhythm of the "good morning" or the "thank you" or whatever else I said to them, not any more meaningful than that. (40-year-old woman here, but I've always done it).

Anyone who gets their back up over it needs their panties un-twisted and their butt un-sticked.

[ashling]

44. It depends

Is she bringing fried chicken and a large glass of sweet tea to my table?

[Old Troop]

45. At my age I pray she's hitting on me