The culture gap: kids birthday parties

[pscot]

I'm basicaly a remnant of the last century, just hanging on here, and some of the new customs puzzle me. One of my nieces threw a birthday party for her six-year-old. In addition to 20 kids, all the parents of both sexes attended. The hundred dollar attraction was a guy with a 10 foot boa constrictor who talked about snakes for an hour (the guy, not the snake). Cake and ice cream were served. I have a couple of questons about this. Is it now customary for mom and dad to attend the kid's parties? Does the snake seem to you guys like an appealing entertainment for sixes?

[ceile]

1. I can answer one part.

My sis threw my nephew a party at a kids gymnastic type place (he's 4). The preparation for the party included bags for the kids (stickers, pencils, etc) and food for the adults. Now, I'm talking shrimp and veggies, some type of quiches, funky cheeses (not the typical cheese plate from the grocery store) and wine. The adults had more food prepped than the kids. I thought it was odd, but every parent (at least one per child, sometimes both) stayed for the whole party. Most of the wine was gone before the party ended...

[AngryAmish]

2. I would never be left alone with some random kids from my daughters kindergarten

She isn't in kindergarten yet but I am not going to be left alone with some else's kid. A good friend of mine - fine. But you never know when some nutjob parent will accuse you of stuff with their kid. So 1. Family only birthdays. 2. If you want you kid over at my house, you come and deal with them. I am not going to help some kid change a dirty underpants with the atmosphere these days.

[pscot]

3. It's a different world

n/t

[BlueIris]

4. Do you honestly worry that just because you're left alone with a stranger's child,

you're going to be accused of "stuff with" said child? Really?

:scared:

[AngryAmish]

5. Yes. It is a non-trivial concern.

An experiment. Start a thread about someone suspected of child molestation. There are many people who will demand immediate execution. Even an accusation ruins your life.

So, no kids around me.

[Xithras]

14. Happens all the time.

I don't allow other peoples kids in my house unless there are other adults around. It's not worth the risk.

Ask yourself this: Child sexual abuse accusations are treated as "True until proven otherwise" in our society and by our legal system. If a kid in your house accused you of something like that, could you PROVE that it didn't happen?

Kids learn about sex abuse in the second grade now, and they are told quite clearly that people accused of it will be taken to jail. Kids aren't stupid, and it just takes one pissed off mean spirited kid to bring your entire life to an end. Even if you beat the prosecution, you will be forever labeled as "the pedo who got away with it".

[Missy Vixen]

19. BI, we don't interact with anyone's children unless the parents are present

EVER.

We have no children. We had big problems in our former neighborhood with a neighbor who insisted there was "something wrong" with us due to the no kids thing, and wouldn't let her kids visit or interact with us. Here's the best part, though. The family in question had three kids, fourteen, eight and four years of age. The mother was a flight attendant for United. The father was a sales executive. BOTH parents were flying home one evening, leaving the oldest "in charge". The development was under threat of evacuation most of that night due to mudslides. In other words, there was no adult supervising these kids, and no relative even in the state.

The mother saw me out at the mailbox the next morning and cooed, "Oh, I know you would have taken care of the kids for the night if you all had to leave."

:mad:

[blueamy66]

6. I just went to my great niece's 2 year bday party

and had an absolute blast.

No snakes, but it was still fun. :-)

[pscot]

12. I can see it in the case of a 2 year old

who probably hasn't learned to interact with other kids. But it seems like sixes would rather be running around playing games and throwing cake at one another than sitting with 40 adults, but then I'm forty years past my best by date.

[Kali]

7. bad enough to have to entertain a bunch of other people's brats

much less the other people too, but the snake sounds kind of cool.

[XemaSab]

8. I grew up in the 80's

and typically the only parents at a party were the host parents.

[Brickbat]

9. Birthday parties were invented to parents of the attendees could go have fun for two hours without

the kids. It blows me away that parents throw parties and expect other parents to sit there.

ETA: It also blows me away that people spend that kind of cash on a kids' party. Especially a 6-year-old. Make a treasure hunt, knock around a pinata, eat cake and open presents, and you're good to go.

[WolverineDG]

11. you should see what they pay for a 1 year old's party nt

[Brickbat]

17. Yeah, I know. Some people just feel the need to piss money down a hole.

[WolverineDG]

21. A cake, some ice cream, presents, a few party favors, & a pinata

was all we needed at our birthday parties. Funny, we all seemed to grow up & not become criminals because we didn't have clowns & pony rides. :eyes:

dg

[noamnety]

10. My goddaughter's family does that.

My husband's gone to her birthday parties throughout the years. I think I may have gone to one, I couldn't take it.

When I was a kid a party was for the birthday child and their friends. Not a bunch of adults the kid doesn't even want to hang out with. We've run into other birthday culture gaps, though - most notably at the first time I went to the husband's birthday gathering with his family. He came home with a full cake from a restaurant - ordered, but we were too full to eat it. Eventually he had some and I cut myself a slice. He wanted to know what I thought I was doing. Apparently in his vision of birthdays, the entire birthday cake was for the person having the birthday, not for sharing with lowly people like the birthday boy's wife.

[trof]

13. Oh yeah. The 'indoor event party'.

Jump-O-Rama or some such.
The big inflatable slides and whatever.
Basketball shoots on inflated jumpy things.
:eyes:
ALL the parents (and some grandparents) come.
You rent the venue for whatever $$$$.
AND They'll provide pizza (for a price, natch).
And a huge rolling bin for the presents.

Plus: You don't have to mess up your house with a bunch of kids smushing birthday cake and ice cream into your carpet. And there's a lot of delighted screaming.
:shrug:

Minus: It just ain't the same as a bunch of kids gathering at the celebrant's house with only ONE set of parents there.
Or, probably just Mom if it wasn't a week end.
;-)

[applegrove]

15. My sister rented some reptiles and their handlers for my nephew's b-day. He was

still talking about it months later so it certainly was a hit.

[Skittles]

16. I've never had a birthday party, ever

[Kali]

24. well shit, lady

I'd drive to Texas to throw one for you!

[LeftyMom]

18. Leftykid just had his this weekend.

There were more adults than kids there, but he invited who he wanted and that included a lot of adult relatives and friends of the family who don't have kids. Everybody met up a local park, I brought food, and we sat around and BS'd at a picnic table on a beautiful day while the sprogs played, then there was a cake (store-bought, I was running short on time) and a few presents opened (nothing excessive, I've had to put my foot down about this in years past) and some tag and frisbee and a few card games were played.

It cost me maybe $100, mostly because I made enough food to feed a third world country. With leftovers, I may not have to cook for a week, so it balances out.

I refuse to overdo parties and spend a fortune. I've never noticed that kids have more fun when that happens, so I don't see the point.

[realisticphish]

20. sounds freakin awesome

but I'm a reptile nut

[pscot]

22. Theres one in every crowd

or thread.

[GoneOffShore]

23. I only go to kids parties if there's gin.