"If you don't call me back you are going to miss the funeral" - the voice message left for my nephew

[Minimus]

from my sister. My poor nephew... he couldn't reach his mom so he preceded to call me, my mom, and my other sister trying to find out who died. Well there was no funeral... my sister was just mad that my nephew had not returned any of her calls. He is a 22 year old college kid who is just out doing his thing... going to school, working, and having fun.

I think it was a very mean (kind of cruel actually) thing to do but everyone else thinks it was funny. Even my nephew has just chalked it up to his mom just being her normal self.

What do y'all think?

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. My dear Minimus...

I'm with you...I think that's unbelievably cruel too.

Not one bit funny.

If his mom is just doing her her normal thing...what would abnormal look like?

Sheesh.

:hug:

[Angel]

2. To toy with someone's emotions

is not funny or normal behavior. Her "normal behavior" will most likely turn to resentment towards her from the son. You can only play with someone's emotions for so long before they become resentful of whom ever is causing the pain.

[GreenPartyVoter]

3. Ugh. I would never do that to my kids. How awful!

[Mojambo]

4. Depends on the kind of relationship you have

This is the kind of thing that would probably pass in my family, but we have a very longstanding bent towards black humor.

I can see how it would be very upsetting if this weren't the normal vibe in one's family.

[Maine-ah]

13. agreed...very dark here too..

call me insensitive, but honestly I laughed. :hide:

[Minimus]

14. We tend to be ones with dark humor also and

the rest of the family thought it was funny. I thought it crossed a line because my nephew was in a panic. Once he found out no one was dead he laughed about it also.

My sister said she is tired of him not returning her calls. Her defense was that she does not bother him very much but when she calls he should call her back because one day there just may be an emergency.

I still think it was cruel... I am not a parent but could never imagine leaving that message for my child, or anyone for that matter.

[Orrex]

5. Tell him to leave *her* a message:

"Sorry, Mom. I'd have called sooner, but I was out with half a dozen women. You know, trying to make you a grandmother."

[elleng]

6. Mean.

Thank goodness my daughter contacted me today. 21, college, busy, apologized, and we talked while I was in the grocery store.

I leave messages for her like, 'Thanks for your call. NOT.'

[MiddleFingerMom]

7. There's no humor in that. It was simply...

.
...MEAN -- asshole-mean.
.
Your poor nephew. My heart goes out to him for the fears and panic he
must have been feeling as a result of that. We run into those situations
enough without someone insinuating them because they're "perturbed"
about something.
.
I've worked a good deal of customer service in my life. Once, a woman
called who sounded like she may have been 50-ish with a problem that
really wasn't in the domain of the company I was working for. As the
call was winding down and she realized that she had called the wrong
place, she came up with what sounded like for all the world a very
well-practiced, very often-used attention-getter -- a very FLIP "Well,
I guess I'll just have to kill myself to get anything done about it."
.
I got a sense of a long-suffering family who had to put up with this sort
of nonsense and, before I was consciously aware of it, said, "Well, Ma'am...
suicide is ALWAYS an option."
.
I couldn't believe that I had just said that and at the same time, I thought
it was HILARIOUS and just the right thing to have said to this manipulative
person.
.
She hesitated a two-beat and said, "It's a darn good thing you don't work
at a suicide Hotline."
.
I held my tongue at that point.
.
If I had thought there was one IOTA of serious intent in her statement, I
would have either not said what I did or immediately apologized and listened
to her.
.
But I still believe to this day that she was simply being just as manipulative
as your sister and that she tormented people with that garbage on a regular
basis.
.
If your sister ever does that to your nephew (or ANYONE you care about) again,
you (and perhaps other family members along with you), should sit her down and
read her the riot act about her cruelty.
.

[MrMickeysMom]

8. She needed to make the point another way...

Like, if she wanted to shame him into keeping in touch with her, perhaps keep it light and funny, but don't mess with messages like that.

[Kali]

9. I would have called back and left a message

asking what kind of maroon leaves s stupid message like that and no time or location.

[madinmaryland]

10. Your nephew's mother needs to meet Skittles foot!

She needs a good ass kicking. Yes Indeed!

[LiberalAndProud]

11. I'm coming Elizabeth!

It's just so -- sitcom-like, isn't it?

[SeattleGirl]

12. I think it's mean.

I don't find anything humorous in that message at all, but then, I lived for years on the edge of my seat everytime the phone rang, because I never knew if I would be getting a call telling me my mother had passed away. I finally got that call, and it broke my heart.

So no, nothing humorous in that message, imho.

[LibDemAlways]

15. That was no doubt said out of

sheer exasperation. I assume that your sister has helped her son in many ways big and small and been there for him all his life. If all she's asking for is a couple of minutes of his time once in a while on the phone, he shouldn't have blown her off in the first place. A 22-year-old is an adult and should know better than to simply ignore mom.

I probably wouldn't have gone so far as to have implied that someone died or that she's about to off herself (could be taken either way), but I understand where she's coming from.

[driver8]

16. That is effed up -- not funny at all.

That is a very mean thing to do to someone who is away from home.

[MrCoffee]

17. I think that's hilarious

and exactly the sort of message my mom would leave me.