Someone dropped a new in the box pregnancy test on the sidewalk near my house yesterday.

[LeftyFingerPop]

I was a little baked last night, so I decided to try it...you know...just screwing around.

So in the little results window, a picture of Don Knotts appeared after the recommended waiting time.

I'll tell you what...I have no idea why that happened, but it scared the shit out of me.

[Ptah]

1. You were looking in the mirror.

[LeftyFingerPop]

2. Finally...a response in the lounge that makes sense.

[Ikonoklast]

3. Don Knotts is a Fertility God in some cultures.

You have been blessed by his benevolence.

[LeftyFingerPop]

4. I come to DU for reasoned responses like this.

Thank you.

[Ikonoklast]

5. May the Almighty and Fecund Lord Knotts bestow His blessings upon you.

By His Holy Bow Tie you will be born again.

[MiddleFingerMom]

6. Don't ask ME why LFP took the test...

.
...I've been out-of-town.
.
Seriously. For a very long time.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Don't lookitme like THAT!!! I ain't your babydaddy!!!!
.

[HopeHoops]

7. Did you use it?

Are ya' knocked up?