Man accidentally shoots himself in testicles

[foxfeet]

Seattle Times staff

A man accidentally shot himself in the testicles at Lowe's Home Improvement store in Lynnwood Sunday afternoon, police said.

The man's handgun, which was in the waistband of his pants, went off at about 12:30 p.m. — an apparent "accidental discharge," according to Shannon Sessions, a Lynnwood police spokeswoman.

"It made a loud noise and scared a lot of people in the store," Sessions said. "I believe he shot himself in the testicles and he also had some injuries to his leg and foot. He was obviously in shock."

Full article: http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2011994648_accident31m.html


Does this count for the Darwin Award?

[Initech]

1. Man Plaxico really gets around, doesn't he?

[Captain Hilts]

2. You beat me to it!

[XemaSab]

3. That would qualify him for a Darwin Award, yes

:D

[EvolveOrConvolve]

4. I don't think he officially qualifies for a Darwin award unless he dies

But, since his chances of future reproduction are limited, he earns an honorary Darwin Award status.

[foxfeet]

5. He may be wishing he were dead.

I keep imagining the look on his face.

[cherish44]

9. no you just have remove yourself from the gene pool by being stupid

while death is the most common way to get the award, there are cases where rending oneself sterile has qualified :)

[hedgehog]

6. Well, I don't think anyone does that on purpose!

[foxfeet]

8. Oh, Sweetie, the stories I could tell you of things I've seen,

all done deliberately.

[pokerfan]

7. It's not safe

to walk around (ahem)) half-cocked.

[foxfeet]

10. Half-cocked would be something for him to remember with fond nostalgia.

[Euromutt]

46. Strictly speaking, it should be

The whole point of the saying is that a gun with its hammer at half-cock is supposed to not go off. The half-cock notch used to be--and on lever-action rifles typically still is--the closest thing to a manual safety you'd find on a gun prior to the late 19th century. So a gun that "goes off at half-cock" is by definition defective.

[Aristus]

11. You know, if those poor, innocent, law-abiding testicles had just had guns,

they would have been able to defend themselves...

:+

[HopeHoops]

12. Lets hope he hadn't already contributed to the conception of children.

Sounds like a good candidate for removal from the gene pool.

[Dr Morbius]

13. Only in old movies does a cop or a hood stuff a gun in his pants.

Professionals of either stripe use holsters for a reason.

Our moral today is that stupidity (like everything else) has consequences.

[xchrom]

14. guns and balls in one thread, awesome.. nt

[foxfeet]

19. We aim to please!

[sarge43]

15. "He was obviously in shock."

[foxfeet]

20. Just when I thought understatement was dead, too.

[sarge43]

39. Officer Sessions hit the "No shit Sherlock" bull's eye. n/t

[guitar man]

16. !!

:rofl:

[Odin2005]

17. LOL at "accidental discharge"

:rofl:

[foxfeet]

21. It's handgun clap, I tell ya!

[struggle4progress]

18. Don't you want to post this in the gungeon, so that everyone could

point out how much safer his testes would have been if they had been ready to shoot back?

[foxfeet]

22. Nah, let 'em strap their balls on

and venture into the Lounge.

[LeftyMom]

25. I don't think they're that brave. nt

[jazzhound]

47. Funny thing for someone to say who doesn't have the balls

to venture into "The Gungeon".

[LeftyMom]

53. Why bother? The morons all post in GD too.

:shrug:

[jazzhound]

54. Another faux-progressive exposes themselves with the predictable

(hypocritical) bigoted snipe.

[jazzhound]

55. And funny how you "intelligent folk" are always so quiet

on threads like this one:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=118x319454

Whatsa matta? No wisdom to share with us morons?

[Euromutt]

51. Nah, it's just that it's usually not worth the bother

Since the moderators have a tendency to dump every gun-related thread into the Gungeon sooner or later, there's not a whole of point to having Mohammed come to the mountain.

[Euromutt]

49. That straw man never seems to get old, does it?

Provided you're one of the people who mindlessly regurgitate it at every opportunity, anyway.

[rurallib]

23. Someday, in a high voice, he won't be able to tell his grandchildren

"back when I had my balls .........."

[liberaltrucker]

24. Yep, Darwin is shit eatin' grinnin'

One doesn't have to die to earn The Award.
Just remove him/her self from the gene pool.

Mission Accomplished.

:rofl:

[pokerfan]

26. Wasn't this in Christmas Story?

[foxfeet]

27. Yes. I nearly peed myself the first time I heard Melinda Dillon

say, "balls."

[sakabatou]

28. Yes, it's Darwin Award

[ElboRuum]

29. If he did not die as a result of his misadventure....

then all he can hope for is an honorable mention...

[pokerfan]

33. According to the official rules

Sterility is the same as dead.

So how are the Darwin Awards actually determined?

Nominees significantly improve the gene pool by eliminating themselves from the human race in an obviously stupid way. They are self-selected examples of the dangers inherent in a lack of common sense, and all human races, cultures, and socioeconomic groups are eligible to compete. Actual winners must meet the following criteria:

Reproduction
Out of the gene pool: dead or sterile.

Excellence
Astounding misapplication of judgment.

Self-Selection
Cause one's own demise.

Maturity
Capable of sound judgment.

Veracity
The event must be true.

http://www.darwinawards.com/rules

[Tobin S.]

30. Ouch! I bet that hurt.

[MiddleFingerMom]

31. He shot his testicles and is now in shock? What a pu...

.
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...no no no, that just wouldn't be right.
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What did I come in here to say?
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Oh, yeah.
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Accidental!?!?!? I've shot my testicles SEVERAL times.
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On purpose.
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May do it again.
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I get a kick outta sending the results out to random strangers. Maybe to you.
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I'm quite proud of it. I do good work.
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I wonder just WHERE that camera is.
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.

.

[proteus_lives]

32. It's called a holster dipshit.

Man, I was taught firearms safety as a kid and one of those lessons was how fucking stupid it was to stick a gun in your waistband.

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

34. Immediately after, he was heard to say "Awww, nuts."

:evilgrin:

[rurallib]

35. Will Lowe's be able to make a commercial out of this?

'If you must carry something in your waistband, make it a hammer from Lowe's!"

[jazzhound]

56. Very nice! n/t

[NoGOPZone]

36. That's one way to beat the high cost of a vasectomy

but remember, guns don't neuter people, people neuter people.

[Deep13]

37. My guess at what happened.

He has a 1911 type pistol that is carried "cocked and locked." That is with the hammer drawn and the safety switched on. In stuffing a loaded pistol into his pants, the pressure from the belt or fabric pushed the safety lever into the "fire" position leaving the hammer drawn just waiting for a bump to set it off.

This guy is too stupid to operate a can-opener, never mind a gun or a car. Some guns have a decocker. This guy almost became decocked himself.

[foxfeet]

38. "Oops" doesn't quite cover the situation.

He's lucky that, in this day and age, he can get testosterone hormone replacement and at least a credible cosmetic surgery repair even if he doesn't retain any biological function.

[Euromutt]

45. No, that hypothesis doesn't quite work

You're forgetting that a 1911 has a grip safety as well, which would have to be depressed for the weapon to fire. I'd sooner bet on some striker-fired model, like a Glock (most probable candidate) or S&W M&P. As smarter people than I have said about the Glock, "the good thing about is that, when you pull the trigger, it will fire; the bad thing is that, when you pull the trigger, it will fire."

[Deep13]

58. You're probably right.

A Browning HP has no grip safety, but they are pretty uncommon these days and most people who buy them are real pistol enthusiasts who would know better.

[Nuclear Unicorn]

40. "Accidental discharge"

I wish I had a dollar everytime I heard THAT one.

[sarge43]

41. I don't think that gun respects him. n/t

[Nuclear Unicorn]

42. It's not like he was packing magnums.

Just sayin'

[Blue_Tires]

43. at least now he'll be able to hit from the Ladies' Tees....

[Xipe Totec]

44. Man cocks gun, uncocks self nt

[Lucian]

48. Confucius says: Man with gun half-cocked get accidental discharge.

[Euromutt]

52. See my post #46

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=9383729&mesg_id=9384874

The point of the expression is that a gun should not go off at half-cock, and if it does, that's mechanical defect.

[Mendocino]

50. Bet he doesn't have the balls to try it again.

[old mark]

60. Duzy....if only.....nt

[Iggo]

57. Dar-fucking-Win!!!

[Bucky]

59. From the headline, I just assumed you meant "shot with his camera"

Cause I've done that.



Although that wasn't accidental.

[foxfeet]

61. Cleanup in the tool aisle!