Post a wacky conspiracy theory about a DUer.

[MilesColtrane]

(I would hope that this thread will remain of the "tribute" variety, and not the "call out" variety.)

I'll go first.

"Boojatta" is really a powerful A.I. residing in a Cray mainframe in some secret DARPA lab.

[mix]

1. Your first name is actually "Liam". nt

[Bucky]

2. Mr Coffee is *actually* made out of coffee. Specifically...

the grounds from a pot of Folgers French Roast brewed in the employees' commissary at Three Mile Island which, when exposed to a sudden heavy dose of gamma radiation, mutated into walking, talking, and terribly wide awake quasi-humanoid entity.

Yes, that's right; you heard me. French Roast.

[Dr. Strange]

6. No, not French roast.

It's mostly Pumpkin Spice Latte. Mostly.

[JohnnyLib2]

3. The LOLcats are posting their own pictures.

And I believe it.

[Ikonoklast]

4. There are actually only two DU'ers that write and answer every single post.

And I am not one of them.





http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-b5aW08ivHU

[madinmaryland]

5. Orrex is actually a dealer in stolen brazilian vacuum cleaners.

[Dr. Strange]

7. flvegan's dark pleasure?

Potato-flavored ice cream made from (human) breast milk.

[flvegan]

8. TZ once gave the Loch Ness Monstah tree-fitty.

[TZ]

11. LOL

Here's one you should have gone for...My last name is really Weinrib and therefore I've been posting here for one and only reason to shill for a certain Canadian band (and hell its believable because there is a bit of a facial resemblence...) :rofl:

[Chan790]

9. Dr. Strange is actually the epitome of average and normal.

Also, he's not really a doctor. He just plays one on the internet...and that badge he carries that says "Boob inspector" came from a box of Cracker Jacks.

[flvegan]

10. He said wacky, not flat out laughably insane!

[KamaAina]

12. Lyric was recently named one of the five Illuminati Primi.

Fnord! :tinfoilhat:

[HopeHoops]

13. MiddleFingerMom spends all day finding really weird shit to post on DU.

Wait, never mind. That's not a conspiracy theory - that's reality.

[Gormy Cuss]

14. KamaAina is female and has never been to Hawaii.

She was born in Sandpoint, ID and lives in Wasilla when she's not gallavanting around the country promoting tea party candidates.

[MrScorpio]

15. Cal Peggy is the very first hippie

She single-handedly started that movement on her own.

She penned Timothy Leary's phrase "Turn on, tune in, drop out".

There's an alley in S.F.'s Haight-Asbury neighborhood with her name on it.

By the way, Bruce Lee taught her some killer moves in a pinch.

[Chan790]

16. Tobin's really a very small hispanic woman named Caridad.

She drives around in her pink Prius delivering Meals on Wheels in suburban Louisville, Kentucky and lecturing on the necessity of safe sex practices among the elderly. She never gets on the interstate because she's afraid of the big-rig trucks.

[newcriminal]

17. Rug has carpet envy.

[Rosie1223]

46. rug doesn't match the drapes.

[Chan790]

18. newcriminal literally can't fall asleep...

until they've had cherry-flavored red jello rubbed into their scalp, been tucked into bed with a marmoset and had Dust In The Wind by Kansas sung to them in four-part harmony. Every night.

[cwydro]

19. Miss Honeychurch is not really German.

She is a Republican who lives in Mississippi and has a Sarah Palin sticker on her pickup truck!:rofl:

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

20. Random Thoughts is an elderly spinster

who lives with 11 cats, for whom she knits charming little outfits. She attends Bingo games at the senior center every Tuesday and enjoys watching Lawrence Welk and "Murder, She Wrote" reruns. She once had a huge crush on Matlock.

[RandomThoughts]

26. Nope, not correct.

Guess again :)



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Db40S82sqic

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8mJwgPiarg



Someone posted a question about Gandalf and who would win in some battle.

When reading a story, it is easiest to look at each character and find the attributes of that character, that was the story of the Knights of the round table, each Knight had a different attribute. In any story, you can look for the attributes of the characters, and that explains why people like one side or another.

So in the question of who would win Gandalf versus the dark side emperor, who would win is most often thought of within the context of the story. But in reality each character is a summation of many attributes. Why did people like Aragon, Gandalf, Luke, and the many other heroes of stories. Because the attributes they found to be ideas they think are better. The concept of virtues.

The story of King Arthur best shows that, where each Knight in the story had a different attribute, and in most stories you see those same attributes in the various heroes of stories. So in that the characters in stories are like the people we want to be if we can find those better attributes in ourselves. And through story and song, we can be shown what attributes we respect, and if possible would try and be more like.

Who was Gandalf? Who was Luke, or Aragorn, or the Knights of the Round table? They are all parts of the better attributes that most people strive for. And all people can reach, I know such things can be reached because the smallest of people showed it every day in bars and while working at a grocery store, and in many places more often seen, like the people on the news and TV.

Side note I don't believe in monarchy, but I doubt King Arthur did either, since the concept of the Round Table is a democratic concept.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

32. Ha! Gotcha! Nobody but an elderly spinster with a bunch of cats

would write a treatise about Gandalf and King Arthur on an Internet message board. Shuffleboard game got over early, cats were napping, out of yarn to tat doilies with, no Matlock reruns on TV -- what else is there to do? Mix up a batch of appletinis and hit the Internets, that's what.

Next time I want to see something about Derrida and Marx.

[RandomThoughts]

39. If you want to see those things.

Then post them.


Are you saying anyone that looks at stories or literature fits the view you state?

Or do you speak for yourself with your choice of reply, as you comment on comments about Gandalf and King Arthur on an Internet message board.

How did you do at your shuffleboard game?


There are some indoor shuffleboard games at a few bars I enjoy playing. Ever tried those games?




My point is you try to use the logic of connecting posting comments about Gandalf and King Arthur on the internet as some criteria of a person. That is sort of like I mention in the post, where you attach some attribute to someone. However the attribute you attach does not come from the cumulative posts, but from yourself, or what you want to think. That is how most think, they don't think or hear, they replace what they think or hear with what they already think.

So when you try to think of an attribute of a character in a story, like you did commenting on my postings, you do not attach them by the attributes of that person, but by what you want to think of that person for personal bias.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

43. Dude, I was trying to be funny. Don't read any more into it than that.

[Boojatta]

21. You inspired me to consult a hardware reference manual!

Specifically, I consulted the CRAY-1 Computer System® Hardware Reference Manual 2240004.

You can consult it yourself by visiting the website at the following link:
http://ed-thelen.org/comp-hist/CRAY-1-HardRefMan/CRAY-1-HRM.html

.
.
.

While I was consulting the reference manual, I wanted to say that it "feels like I'm all the way back where I come from", but it would be much more appropriate for those words to be sung.

[sakabatou]

22. Sakabatou doesn't know ANY Japanese and he's just playing people

Wait...

[HEyHEY]

23. Mr. Scorpio gives good head.

[MrScorpio]

25. For a good time call 555-6969

Ask for Trixie

[HEyHEY]

27. And if she ain't there?

[MrScorpio]

28. Ask for Candy nt

[Odin2005]

24. Flvegan enjoys a bacon cheeseburger when alone.

[flvegan]

31. !

You promised you'd never tell!

LOL

[Dr. Strange]

47. Notice how he didn't say, "Flvegan enjoys EATING a bacon cheeseburger when alone."

Busted, pev!

[Electric Monk]

29. Dave's not here, man

[Chan790]

30. Amerigo Vespucci's screen name isn't a screenname.

That's actually his name. His parents also strongly considered Ichabod van Winkle.

[rug]

33. Kali has a pied-a-terre in Manhattan.

[redwitch]

34. HEyHEY is a 12 year old girl living in Bayonne, New Jersey.

And is the founder of the Glenn Beck for President fan club.

[rug]

35. Close. He's living with a 12 year old girl and Glenn Beck in Shanghai.

He vacillates.

[redwitch]

36. Actually Glenn Beck is the 12 year old girl.

He acts like one at any rate.

[HEyHEY]

37. That's why he ain't getting his cookies AGAIN

[cherokeeprogressive]

38. HighFructosePronSyrup is a poor proofreader. n/t

[Skittles]

40. Frencie Cat is actually Michelle Obama

[ChoralScholar]

41. Skittles is actually a stock holder in M&M's and Reese's Pieces. EOM

[AsahinaKimi]

42. This really is

MiddlefingerMom

[charlie and algernon]

44. "Skinner" is actually Principal Skinner and DU is one big practical joke

by the Simpsons' creators

Shit, now I've said too much... :yoiks:

[elehhhhna]

45. i once convinced myself that a certain duer was Christopher hitchens wife.

truefact.