What if famous people had Jewish mothers?

[Hawkeye-X]

IF THEY HAD JEWISH MOTHERS

MONA LISA'S JEWISH MOTHER: "After all the money your father and I spent on braces, this you call a smile?"

CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS' JEWISH MOTHER: "I don't care what you've discovered, you didn't call, you didn't write."

MICHELANGELO'S JEWISH MOTHER: "A ceiling you paint? Not good enough for you the walls, like the other children? Do you know how hard it is to get that schmutz off the ceiling?"

NAPOLEON'S JEWISH MOTHER: "You're not hiding your report card? Show me! Take your hand out of your jacket and show me!"

ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S JEWISH MOTHER: "Again with that hat! Why can't you wear a baseball cap like the other kids?"

GEORGE WASHINGTON'S JEWISH MOTHER: "Next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!"

THOMAS EDISON'S JEWISH MOTHER: "Okay, so I'm proud that you invented the electric light bulb. Now turn it off already and go to sleep!"

PAUL REVERE'S JEWISH MOTHER: "I don't care where you think you have to go, young man, midnight is long past your bedtime!"

[xchrom]

1. now i feel guilty. nt

[barb162]

2. These could be replaced by Italian, German, Greek, etal mothers

[BillStein]

8. old joke, but

Do you know the difference between Jewish mothers and Italian mothers?


Italian mothers can cook!

[WinkyDink]

9. I think the idioms are spot-on.

[old mark]

3. They would all be married and have grandchildren...

and everyone would stop at grandma's for Channakuh Seder...Call, come by, you shouldn't be a stranger...

mark

(Both my Jewish in-laws are dead - they were the sweetest people I ever knew. She used to cook dinners for 25 or 30 people...herself.)

[Danmel]

7. Passover Seder

[VioletLake]

4. Did you show this to your mother? nt

[Aristus]

5. So I've been on this Undaground Democratic whatchamajig for nine years for this?

I should have to read such awful?

[pink-o]

6. Newsflash! Da Vinci and Columbus did have Jewish Mothers

Although it's doubtful they were kvetches, so still funny!

[WinkyDink]

10. Hannibal Lecter's JM: "So, what am I, chopped liver?.......HEY!"