Shit

[indigo32]

I just got off the phone with a girl I broke up with about 3 weeks ago. Now I'm depressed after a good day and angry too. I sit there on the phone the whole time feeling guilty as hell (even though it was the right decision) cuz she says she's still hurting but wanted to tell me what was going on in her life anyways. But then I got mad because she said she felt like using again last weekend (she's been clean and in 12 step for over 18 months)... so I'm feeling totally manipulated. I don't even know what she wants. I swear she saps every bit of energy I have. Sigh. I'm sorry I just had to vent.

[Qanisqineq]

1. If she calls you and tells you she feels like using again

then it sounds like she is trying to send you on a guilt trip to get you back. That's how I see it. It could be that she feels comfortable talking about these things with you but she should have a sponsor to call and talk about that stuff with.

[indigo32]

2. I kinda think she is trying to make me feel guilty

either to make me feel bad cuz she does or because she thinks she can win me back. She's relapsed in the past... but I know her well enough to think that she's not really going to use at this time.

[amandae]

3. Tough to see someone you care for go through

something like that ... but it sounds like you made the right choice. What are you supposed to do? Run back to her because she said she was going to use? It's good that she's talking about it, but I agree that she's just trying to manipulate you into going back to her, and completely agree that she needs to talk to someone from her group about this and not you.

Feel confident that you made the right decision for you and encourage her to seek help from professionals.

[Skittles]

4. maybe she just needs a friend

people like this are trying on the nerves but she's in recovery and just getting over a broken relationship. She's hurting bad and knows you can relate. Does she have any other friends?

[indigo32]

5. You're probably right

I'm just not the one she should be coming to so soon though. Thankfully she does have friends that I hope she can talk to.

[Skittles]

6. indigo, confide in some of those other friends of hers

let them know how concerned you are.