The Coconut Tree

[rbnyc]

Every night as part of my son's bedtime routine, he answers "the coconut tree questions."

"Did you treat people with respect?"
"Did you treat yourself with respect?"
"Were you thankful for the things you have and did you not whine and complain about things you don't have?"
"Did you take care of your things and clean up after yourself?"
"Did you listen and pay attention?"
"Did you do anything to put yourself or others in danger?"

There's a big poster of a coconut tree on his door that we made 3 years ago. He has a little coconut with his initial on it. If he can answer yes to all those questions, he can move up one slot on the coconut tree. When he gets to the top, he gets a little prize. Then he starts at the bottom again.

We change the questions periodically, depending on what issues he is working on.

I think I need my own coconut tree.

Right now my questions should be:

"Did you keep a positive attitude at work?"
"Did you focus on what you can improve about yourself and your own actions instead of shifting focus to other people's problems?"
"Did you treat people with kindness, understanding and forgiveness?"
"Did you treat yourself with kindness, understanding and forgiveness?"
"Did you drink enough water?"
"Did you get enough exercise?"
"Did you eat 5 servings of fruits and vegetables?"

If I held myself accountable for those 7 questions at the end of each day, I'm pretty sure I could expect my life to improve.

I have to decide what my reward should be when I get to the top of my coconut tree.

What would YOUR coconut tree questions be? What would your reward be?

:loveya:

[RandomThoughts]

1. There are some that want you to use thankfullness to accept wrong.

"Were you thankful for the things you have and did you not whine and complain about things you don't have?"

It is not a complaint if it is a just due.


There are many people that say be thankful I don't beat you to a bloody pulp. Then somehow try to say that is something a person should appease.

If there is no right, then thankfulness can be to get submission to wrong.
If some action is not just and correct, then being thankful for anything you have, and having at least something, is used to get a person to submit to some wrong action.

Someone throws you a crumb and tells you to be thankful, they are claiming power to decide what you should have, do not appease such things.

I am thankful for justice and compassion, and will give that thanks when it is corrected.


Side note, that does not mean I am not thankful for many kind things, and wonders in many places, but I choose what I am thankful for, and who I thank.

Being thankful has nothing to do with what you have. That is an error.

[rbnyc]

2. Wow. Your writing is so hard to understand.

I think I get your meaning, but your syntax is so weird. Every time I read one of your posts, I think, there may be something really compelling here, if only it were well written. And every time I read one of your posts, I write a message like this and then don't post it or go back and erase it because I don't want to offend you. Please understand, what I'm trying to say is that your thoughtful ideas deserve to be well expressed.

There is validity in what you say, that thankfulness for having very little should not be used to suppress the struggle for something better. In the case of my 6-year-old the issue is a bit more simple. For example, after a day of playing in the park, getting treats and seeing friends, if he doesn't get a second ice cream cone on the way home, he will pitch a fit and say his life is terrible and he never gets anything he wants.

Your deeper point, that being thankful has nothing to do with what you have, is interesting. It's wonderful to have a sense of gratitude that transcends "things" but I think it's a mistake not to be thankful for food, shelter, clothes, toys, etc.

[RandomThoughts]

3. I added a bit to the comment.

It goes like this, be thankful for good things from better intents and good sources that mean to help, even if they can not give alot.

Don't be thankful to give something the impression it can decide what you have, and get you to submit to get that thing, they have no right to decide if you have.

In that what you have is not what should define thankfulness.



You may also be being blocked from seeing what I wrote, I don't have locks on it, but you may not be able to see it by some blocker in you. I used to have the same issue with really old texts from a variety of cultures. You have to make your way through the blockers, like finding a key by reading them many times till you can see the comments.

Read it many times till you can get through the confusion, if that is blocking you.

Although it may have been that I did not explain it clearly, and assumed it would be easy to understand, so added a bit to it.

[rbnyc]

4. I do like your ideas here...

...but is there a special usefulness in using language not only unconventionally but often incorrectly? If it does serve a purpose, like forcing the reader to absorb the information with a different part of the brain, then I concede that merit. Although, as a writer, I do believe you need to know the rules in order to break the rules, and I am suspicious.

At the same time, when you say that one should read your posts again and again until they become clear, that could come off as arrogant and will limit your audience. I guess it all depends upon what is important to you, being understood by the few who endeavor to learn your personal language, or endeavoring yourself to be understood by many more.

[RandomThoughts]

5. only if you do not understand them.

It is true there is a communication issue, but it could be that the text is scrambled when I write it, or when you read it.

I know of both effects. But I didn't put any locks on them.

It is not saying you need to understand what I write, but if you do or want to understand it, it may, and I say may, be that it is blocked from you seeing it, not me writing it not clear.


It is also possible what I write is not what you see, so there is that also.

You have to understand there are filters and blockers that try to block some communications.


Take a post, post it into a internet language translation, back and forth a few times, it could be scrambled after I post, and not seen on my computer, but on your computer.

There are many possibilities, but it is very common effect for text to be scrambled.

It is not arrogant, it is explaining how some things are blocked from people seeing. Same thing has happened to me reading texts, so I understand the effect. It wont get into your brain, you read the words, but no thought forms from what you read, that is a blocker or a lock.

[rbnyc]

8. Are you using an internet translater?

I didn't know that. That would explain everything.

Edit: typo

[RandomThoughts]

12. No I am translating my thoughts on many topics.

Not using an internet translator, unless that be me.

:)

I translate everything I see and hear to a form I can think, and feel on, and hopefully learn from, that is one of the reasons to read things, or listen to things many times, to find a lesson in anything.

Then put down my thoughts here.


So what I see and hear has to be formed into a thought, then that thought expressed, and sometimes I type faster then makes sense.

Although sometimes people have blockers that keep them from seeing what I mean.

[RandomThoughts]

6. On the point of language.

It is not my intent to write it in a different language.

I write it as clearly as possible, it may be there is some other effect that makes it seem not clear, or that makes my writing not come out as clear as it could.

There are blockers and filters that cause much of that.


I am not writing in a different language, but you may be seeing something different then how I write it.

[rbnyc]

14. Here's an example:

"I am not writing in a different language, but you may be seeing something different then how I write it."

The first part of this sentence is totally clear. You say you are not writing in a different language, so I can assume you mean you are writing in English. The next part of the sentence simply does not say what you mean it to say. Because, in this case, the concept is simple and the errors are common, I do know what you mean. But the types of errors in the second part of your sentence could make it very hard for me to understand your meaning if you were trying to express something more nuanced, which you often are.

What you are trying to say is "I am not writing in a different language, but you may be seeing something different than what I write."

By using then instead of than you are simply using the wrong word. Therefore, I have to substitute than for then in my mind as I am reading. You go on to say that what I am seeing is different from how you write. I don’t actually see how you write. I see what you write. I can make inferences about how you write from what I see. But the language in your sentence does not accurately reflect your intended meaning, if what you mean to say is that you are not writing in a different language, but what I see may be different than what you write.

When you are describing more complicated, less common, and more ethereal topics, these types of language issues inhibit understanding.

[RandomThoughts]

7. To explain the effect better.

That is why many that read the Bible have no idea what it says.

Not comparing of coarse, but the reason many people think they follow the Bible or its teachings is when they read it, they don't see what it says.

Same thing with many stories and songs, many people can listen to a song for years, and never have heard anything it says.

That is how someone can think they follow teachings when they don't

There are many people that read the verse O'Donnel mentioned on TV, about helping those in hardship, but it never forms a thought or feeling in there mind.

Part of them blocks them from seeing it.

[rbnyc]

9. This all goes back to the power of metaphor...

...on which I've read your thoughts before.

[RandomThoughts]

11. It is how the teachings include the student.

Half of what you hear depends on the keys in your heart, in that the metaphor separates people, by who they are, and how they choose to see and hear things.

And knowing that, you take more responsibility for your thoughts and feelings, and know following orders is not always clear, since there are always rationalizations and excuses, since many do what they want to do anyways.

Then the teachings are not even heard, but instead used as an excuse to do what the person wants to do anyways. But without the responsibility of admitting it is your decision, instead they say it was what they are told to do.

Nobody responsible.

"A world where nobody is responsible" from soldier video.

Or even better said in this clip, depending how you see it.

Time - Pink Floyd + Lyrics
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYiahoYfPGk

[RandomThoughts]

13. And there is one more thing.

I have been clear, and ignored. So why would I worry about if someone knows my expression or what I mean anyways.

Have you seen the posting of.

I am due beer and travel money, and many experiences.


I have been very clear. Why would I think those with more then they need are listening, nor say something in a way that is understood, when they can't understand that part.

Do you see the ridiculousness.


Although it is true many don't have beer and travel money to spare, there are some that do.

So why would I worry about telling anyone what they should do. They don't listen.


Also a plausible answer to Teller's comment about why someone would not say what was going to happen, when they don't listen anyways. And even if they do, for most with beer and travel money to spare,they don't use the information for what should be done, but for what they want done. So why tell them anyways. Then it is not the not telling that is wrong, but if you know what is going to happen, you also know when it is useless to tell someone anyways.

The faults of capitalism have been explained, why isn't that fixed.

The wrong of consolidations have been explained, why isn't that corrected.

Why would anyone tell someone something, when they won't listen, as they show they don't.

:shrug:



And you know that, becuase, I am still due beer and travel money and that has not arrived.

[rbnyc]

15. OK

No I just think the joke is on me.

[Blue_Tires]

10. i could use a list like that for myself...