THAT'S IT - I'M CALLING THE COPS - My neighbor is terrorizing my pet penguin

[LynneSin]

Keeps threatening poor Penny with his nasty, smelly fish-fart smelling Walrus.

What can I do?

[Bake]

1. Sic the Snow Leopard on him!

:hi:

Bake

[Renew Deal]

2. I think this belongs in the Guns forum.

:evilgrin:

[HopeHoops]

3. Fire penguin pellets through a paintball gun.

[MiddleFingerMom]

4. Penny? Like that name hasn't doomed her to endless teasing from the OTHER penguins.

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At first I read that as "threatening poor Penny with
his nasty, smelly fishfarts".
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I had a neighbor like that once.
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Wait... my NEIGHBOR had a neighbor like that once.
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Nevermind.
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We're ASSUMING that you've warned your pet penguin about stranger danger.
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[texanwitch]

5. BBQ, I wonder what walrus taste like.

Just wondering.

[LynneSin]

6. very fatty meat option

not good for those watching their weight

[texanwitch]

8. Maybe there is some good meat under the fat.

A good slow fire can cook anything.

[trof]

10. Walrus jowls and collards.

Oh yeah

[MiddleFingerMom]

7. M-m-m, walrusloaf. Unless they ruin it by topping it with ketchup in the oven. n/t

[taterguy]

9. Tell your yappy penguin to STFU

It and the walrus will get along just fine.

As long as the penguin SHUTS THE FUCK UP.

[LynneSin]

13. Tell your Walrus to stop crapping on my pansies

:cry:

Won't you think of the pretty pansies!

[taterguy]

14. How fucking dare you accuse my walrus of pooping on your pansies?

Your other neighbor's sea lion does that.

Get your god damn eyes checked.

[LynneSin]

15. Hey I know Walrus crap when I see it - they shit about three times as much as a Sea Lion

and that was a lot of shit my pansies

[taterguy]

16. You don't even know that walrus isn't capitalized

You don't know shit.

[LynneSin]

17. Well La-De-Fricking-Da - you don't know SHIT about wALRUS SHIT!

so ThErE!

[taterguy]

18. I know where my god damn Walrus is at all times

He's got a microchip with GPS.

He never goes anywhere near your yard.

Except of course when he gets an urge to poop on your pansies.

[Bucky]

11. Tennessee Tuxedo and Stanley!

These pets should be able to get along

[MilesColtrane]

12. No need to get the cops involved.