Sample 568 word letter to the Editor on Social Security

[papau]

While Bush has not put a specific plan on the table, what is known is his intent to divert perhaps up to 3 % of the OASDI payroll tax, leaving only perhaps 9.4% of what is now a 12.4% tax to pay checks to current retirees, and to then borrow the money then needed to fill that fiscal hole in order to allow full Soc Sec checks to continue to be sent out. The borrowing is called the Transition Costs and is $2 Trillion dollars added to the current $7 Trillion Nation Debt over the next 10 years - and $15 trillion added to the Debt through the year 2060. The 3% that is diverted would go into private accounts where it would be invested the mutual funds that you would select from among the selection of diversified mutual funds that are offered - this is Bush's "ownership society" concept since you would own what is in those private accounts. The 3% diversion would be voluntary, and you could choose to divert any percentage from zero to 3%.

The reason why this change is needed, per Bush, is the fact the Financial Projection called "Intermediate" says that in the year 2042 (in the Soc Sec Projection), or 2052 (in the General Accounting Office projection) the system's Trust Fund Assets run out and the payroll tax in that year will only be able to pay 73% (in the SSA projection) or 80% (in the GAO projection) of the benefits promised in that year. The current value today of those shortfalls from 2042 to 2078 is $3.7 Trillion in the "Intermediate" projection.

But Bush admits the Soc Sec projection is a bogus reason for these private accounts as they will do nothing to help improve the Soc Sec projected shortfall in 2042 under the intermediate projection. Indeed they add to the National Debt and to the taxes needed to manage that debt in the future. So Bush also cuts the currently guaranteed Soc Sec benefit by 50% over the next 50 years via moving to a CPI index rather than current wage base index in the calculation of the initial retirement benefit, hoping you will do fantastically in the Stock Market and end up with a private account value that can buy you the piece of Soc Sec's guaranteed benefit that has been cut.

Indeed the private accounts are an inefficient way to use the payroll tax, as the British have found as the British accounts soak up more 1% of their value each year in fees paid to the companies that will do the record keeping, and people make poor or unlucky investments decisions, with the result the lowered British guaranteed benefit is all folks have and they end up on Welfare.

All this to avoid Bush's Soc Sec fiscal "iceberg" - an iceberg that just melts away to nothing if we move from the "intermediate" projections economic growth of 1.6% in Gross National Product, to the more reasonable economic growth assumptions of the other Social Security Administration projection.

The Bush agenda isn't to strengthen SS, but ultimately to get rid of it - replaced with private accounts that may, or may not, fund your retirement - Private Accounts that will cost much more to set up than it would cost to "fix" the current system, assuming we find we actually need to fix the system 40 years from now.

[itzamirakul]

1. The entire Social Security crisis is merely a way to

put a lot of instant money into the hands of Wall Street investment brokers and damn the future....

[dweller]

2. what's your word limit?

and are you interested in constructive critique?

there is a lot of info there, and some needs paring, imo.

dp

[papau]

4. The editor that I was assisting with fact collection had a 600 word limit.

I am always interest in constructive critique - and indeed would really appreciate any thoughts you have time to share :-)

So what should I pare, what phrases or contruction sucks, indeed as math/science nerd I am totally unsure of myself in writing - yet I hope to be doing some writing when I retire in the rather near future.

So thanks in advance!

papau

[dweller]

5. for example

While Bush has not put a specific plan on the table, what is known is his intent to divert perhaps up to 3 % of the OASDI payroll tax, leaving only perhaps 9.4% of what is now a 12.4% tax to pay checks to current retirees, and to then borrow the money then needed to fill that fiscal hole in order to allow full Soc Sec checks to continue to be sent out.

could be:

While Bush has not put a specific plan on the table, it is known his intent is to divert up to 3% of the OASDI payroll tax leaving only 9.4% of the now 12.4% tax to pay checks to current retirees. He then intends to borrow the money needed to fill that fiscal hole to allow full SS checks to continue.

i don't think i changed the intent of your words, just the amount. Try to avoid putting too many ideas into too long a sentence, sometimes you can pare out extra wording by taking each thought (that you have joined together with - dashes - and just letting it stand by itself. Follow with the next logical sentence/thought standing alone.
again, for example your 4th para: It's one long sentence. Better as 3. My guide would have me take such a sentence, put each in a different order and if still makes sense, should then be separate ones.

The facts and intent you have written are fine. Just need to pare out some of the excessive words, the train of thought sequence, and you may find you have some room to spare for a few more succinct thoughts.

good luck
dp

[papau]

6. Thanks for the advise and help :-) I like the way your rewrite reads!

:-)

[RobertSeattle]

3. Keep it as short as possible

Iraq is to "WMD's" what Social Security is to "Crisis". There is no there there.

[jburton]

7. This is too long for many papers

200-250 words is the often the limit, both for editors and readers.

[EFerrari]

8. 600-800 for op ed pieces; under 150 for letters

Every now and then, editors will publish longer letters.

But if you want to better your chances
1. You've been following the paper and you try to predict which story the letters editor Will go with (Jessica Lynch, the State of the Union, Condi Rice testifies, etc.) And you write into that -- hook your message in.

2. You submit your letter as early as possible. I shoot for 10 a.m. in whatever city the paper is in.

3. Keep it under 150 words. It's not much but if you write a draft, you'll be surprised at how much you can condense and cut in later swipes.

I've had really good success using these strategies. fwiw

[lonestarnot]

9. The social security scare must be understood by young

people. This methodolgy is avenue to keep wages suppressed and serve to keep people clawing out a living! Nothing more! Slave labor WANTED BY ELITE IN UNITED STATES OF AMERICA! Labor market that can't be suppressed by outsourcing now will be suppressed by this SS scare and PRIVITIZATION (and don't let them claim the rhetoric here nothing but privitization) of our SS deposits!