Jump to Prevent Global Warming

[Sequoia]

July 17, 2006 -- Hans Peter Niesward, from the Department of Gravitationsphysik at the ISA in Munich, says we can stop global warming in one fell swoop — or, more accurately, in one big jump.

The slightly disheveled professor states his case on WorldJumpDay.org, an Internet site created to recruit 600,000,000 people to jump simultaneously on July 20 at 11:39:13 GMT in an effort to shift Earth's position.

Niesward claims that on this day "Earth occupies one of the most fragile positions in its orbits for the last 100 years." According to the site, the shift in orbit will "stop global warming, extend daytime hours and create a more homogeneous climate."

Niesward's theory has at least one major flaw: Niesward doesn't really exist. He is a character created by Torsten Lauschmann, a German-born artist living in Scotland. Lauschmann — a live performer, filmmaker, DJ and photographer — may be best known for his work "Misshapen Pearl," described as a "phenomenological investigation of the streetlamp's function in our consumer society."

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http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/TenWays/story?id=2202916&page=1

[bloom]

1. What is that Eastern Daylight Time?

That is very silly - imagining everyone jumping at once. And thinking it would make a difference.

[bananas]

5. Uh-oh - Wikipedia notes a time zone problem

"The World Jump Day website gives the jump time as 11:39:13 GMT, but the countdown on the same site is (as of May 6 2006) counting down to 10:39:13 GMT. There seems to have been a confusion between the GMT or UTC time and the UK legal time 11:39:13 which takes into account daylight savings time."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_Jump_Day

[Systematic Chaos]

2. Should they do that to Van Halen or the Pointer Sisters?

A real debate for the ages!! :silly:

[Ezlivin]

3. Too bad that most people can't just jump the hell off this planet

I can easily name a few that I'd like to see jump...

[Sequoia]

4. Hey......maybe the Rapture can take care of them!

[Ezlivin]

6. You've given me an idea, Sequoia. And I'll split the proceeds with you...

A do-it-yourself Rapture kit.

Why wait? Rapture yourself with our jump kit. Strap it on and jump away!

[Sequoia]

7. Te he....You got the brains, I've got the looks, let's make lots of money!

[Laotra]

8. I jumped (ouch)

Is the world now saved?