What would a * concession speech be like?

[Clinton Crusader]

Ive been trying to picture this in my head and I cannot come up with ANYTHING! Mainly because he's psychotic and who knows if the meds will kick in, but I cannot for the life of me picture him standing there saying 'I want to congratulate Senator Kerry, President-elect Kerry....'
:kick:

[Rjnerd]

1. four years overdue (nm)

[el_gato]

2. a frothy mixture of delusional ranting and crying for unky dick

"You said this was MINE!" whaaaaaaaaa!

[skypilot]

3. "Uhhh, uhhh...uuummmm...ah...uhhh..."

"You people don't value freedom!"

[aden_nak]

4. There will not be one.

Because he will fight it in the courts to the bitter-fuck end. And when he realizes that he can't get the Supreme Court to hand him the Presidency TWICE in a row (I honestly think if it went to the SC, he wouldn't get the five votes at this point. . . they're partisan, but they're not STUPID), he'll likely have a mental breakdown. Which means Cheney will be handing over the mantle.

And we ALL know what the Cheney speech will sound like. ;)

[Clinton Crusader]

10. Let's pretend he gives one....

starts out calm, with a few thousand, ahhhhh, ummmmmms, then it starts getting a little more animated, and by the middle of it he's a blathering psychotic mess, screaming, 'dont you know you just voted yourself a terra attack!?!?!?!?!', 'you're all DOOMED!!', "Jesus Is A Comin'! And NONE of you are prepared!'..


Must See TV
:kick:

[aeolian]

35. rrrr rrRRRRrrg! Graaaaaa! Fire Bad!

[mindem]

5. Lots of tears, drooling and snot running from his nose.

All while proclaiming that America is in it's final days.

[HFishbine]

6. "My fellow Americans...

Thank God. I'm outta here!"

[BeyondGeography]

7. His daddy will make him do it

Which will make him even angrier...

[Walt Starr]

8. They will never concede

I don't put it past them to barricade themselves in teh White House demanding the SCOTUS weigh in.

[Morning Dew]

9. It will be a Cornwallis moment...

surrender by proxy.

[Connie_Corleone]

11. "Good luck cleaning up my mess! HEHEHE!"

[timezoned]

12. Oh my what a glorious, wonderful, magical, shimmering..

image this is. Thanks, I needed that. Gave me new energy, just imagining it.

Ahhh.

[LiberalEsto]

13. badabbadababbadabaddaa

that's all, folks!

[indie_voter]

14. I think he will be bitter and sorry for himself

He will congratulate Kerry, but he won't be gracious (like Gore was). He will then subject us to self pity whining. He will inform us all the decisions HE made were done for our collective good, implying we are ungrateful rubes.

[JerseygirlCT]

15. I doubt he'd even concede... nt

[ewagner]

37. Agreed

No concession.

[liberal N proud]

16. He will never give a consession speech

When he looses, Shrub will head straight to Crawford.

[jmowreader]

18. That's what I'm thinking...

At which point, we can only hope the cops blockade the ranch until Election Day, when they can go in and arrest the little bastard for crimes against peace.

[Sideways]

17. He Will Piss His Pants And Bark For Karl To Bring A Mop

Other than that he will probably cry and tell the American people to "Go Fuck Yerselves."

[Clinton Crusader]

19. Nah, that's Rump Roasts' job...

* will be a crying heap and have to be lead away, Rump Roast takes over and says "I hope you're all satisfied, look what you've DONE to him? From the bottom of my stone cold heart and especially from my LESBIAN daughter, go fuck yourselves!"

:kick:

[Sideways]

20. My Bad ....It Will Be Microwave Chump Roast

But I don't think Chump Roast will call her my "lesbian" daughter the gloves will come off and he will call her a "dyke" which is EXACTLY what Chump and Lynne think of Mary. She should stake her claim as an orphan on Nov 3rd.

[tanyev]

21. Maybe that's when the meltdown will happen.

I was hoping for it during the debates, but I guess they got the meds regulated in time.

[LibDemAlways]

22. Chimp will never concede.

On election night he'll appear before a carefully screened group of big contributors and engage in his usual swagger and bullshit. When it becomes apparent he's lost and nothing Rove can do will save his sorry ass, he'll do everything in his power to leave Kerry with an even worse mess. Expect massive carnage in Iraq between Nov. and Jan. Chimp will go out with a bang.

[opihimoimoi]

23. The Pyscho Prez will need a spittle cup of the extra large size

Bush will be mad as hell and blame his handlers who fucked it all up for him and Rove too.

He will blame everyone else except himself. And he will never say "I am Sorry I did somethings wrong"

And the Crow he has to eat? It will be raw with only wasabi/shoyu so he can throw up on Roves lap.

[Mad_Dem_X]

39. Oh, I'm sure he'll leave a BIG mess

I'm expecting plenty of carnage and other horrors from November 3rd to January 20th.

[undercover_brother]

24. Karl Rove will be sent to Guantánamo Bay

[Anarcho-Socialist]

25. "I refuse to let Murikan people deprivitize me of my birthright...

...so I am declarin' 'Martial law' to be effective immediately..."

[GOPNotForMe]

26. Drunk.

[cmf]

27. He won't give one

First they'll fight the election with lawsuits. Then when it becomes apparent they won't win, he'll run back home to Crawford with his tail between his legs.

[nostamj]

28. Cheney will deliver it

GO FUCK YOURSELVES!

[Kid_A]

29. I'm gonna tape it and use it for porn.

NOTE: I read that on DU a while back, but I can't remember who posted it. I hope they don't mind my stealing it...

[Mad_Dem_X]

40. ROTFLMAO!!!

:spank:

[zbdent]

30. "Friends, countrymen, we have just been attacked by the freedom-haters

who wish to destroy our democracy.

Right now, I have placed the country on High Alert.

I am ordering the national guard into the streets to protect you from the terrorists.

Anybody who is out of their home on anything less than official duty or a life-threatening emergency will be arrested. Any resistance will be met with force.

I beg you to bear with me in this time of crisis, and may God Bless America.

Okay, Karl, you said the returns are showing a landslide Kerry victory, right? What? The microphone's still on? OH FUCK!"

[Shadow30]

31. I really don't think he will give such a speech...

....the man is unstable and I think if it really comes to a point where its clear that he has lost and on Jan.20th its John Kerry in the white house Bush would be unable to accept it.I am not sure what he will do to stay in the white house but I don't think it'll be pretty.
But just for the sake of argument lets say he did?Well I think it would be the most sour concession speech ever he would be an angry ,spoiled child that didn't get his favorite toy for Christmas and thats a best case scenario,worst case he would rave like a nut until the broadcast was cut and an aide drags him off stage to dope him up on something or other.

[maine_raptor]

32. Two Words: "Not Guilty"

But if there is a Swearing In for John Kerry, then there should be a Swearing Out for George Bush, right? I mean it'll be "Fair and Balanced" that way...any volunteers?

[Hand]

33. Cut and run...

That's what he did in 2000 when the Florida returns came in--jumped up from the restaurant table and got the hell out of there.

He'll sit in Crawford and refuse to concede. It'll just have to happen without him.

The transition will be a nightmare; everyone in the WH will do their utmost to cripple the incoming administration. Kerry will need weeks just to clean up the mess they leave behind and get his staff operating. Look for deliberate and extensive sabotage of everything.

:grr:

[HuskerDem]

34. I suspect it will involve a middle finger

some salty language and "JUST WAIT TILL I TELL MY DAD!"

[Renew Deal]

36. Martial Law is now in effect.

Check the state media for more information.

[JusticeForAll]

38. The evilduers have won

Expect more terra attacks America.

The Whitehouse will be turned over on January 20th WITH ALL the W keys intact on the keyboards, unlike the last evil regime who disrepected our most treasured Office.

America's Era of Personal Responsibility is officially over.


I think this covers the extent of his speech: a little fearmongering, a little guilt trip, and a consistent, never-yielding "stay the course" stream of lies.

[ronnykmarshall]

41. Nothing like his father's.

I watched my tape from 1992 and ol' Poop gave a gracious speach when Clinton won.

The funny part is looking at Jr standing behind him scowling.

[Ishoutandscream]

42. Like many have said here, there will never be a concession speech

Way too arrogant to do something like that. Before that will happen, Bushco will be fighting the results through the courts.

[ComerPerro]

43. angry and drunk

but, that is of course assuming that there is a concession speech.

There won't be.

At all.

Bush will win the election legitimately by invoking fear and 9/11,

or

Bush will steal the election through use of voter fraud

or

Bush will use the legal system to halt democracy as he did in 2000 and have the media convince the public that he won

or

Kerry will win, but in December there will be a terrorist attack and Bush will start a war. Bush will remain President.

[realcountrymusic]

44. Kerry should

Announce in advance his intention to PARDON Shrub for any actionable offenses he committed while in the white house. Humiliate him (on Nov. 3). But don't offer to pardon anyone else involved.

RCM