Network Nattering Nabobs of Negativism 11/2

[PCIntern]

1. ABC: Jennings, with that supercilious Canadian matter-of-fact, holier-than-thou, my-shit-don't-stink hyphenated delivery of his is impossible to listen to. He reminds me of a bad sociology professor. Upside: Nice graphics and to watch G. Will use baseball metaphors continuously to explain the loss of Bush. Another bow-tie boy. Grade: B-

2. NBC: Brokaw has a speech impediment and Russert just gets fatter and fatter - they try never to show him in profile - he looks like he weighs 300+ punds with his stinkin' little white board and his dopey numbers and dry marker with eraser. Isn't he cute and low-tech? Matthews sputtering all night with MSNBC cut-aways. {HEY -spittle-drool} Upside: John Williams' theme song for NBC News. That's it. Grade: C+

3. CBS: Rather with his aphorisms, all mixed, and very confusing - almost like Spoonerisms - I guess we could call them Ratherisms (chances of winning are flatter than a hedgehog squashed on a summer road by a 4x4 pickup) WHAT TF? Upside: Good baritone voices except Lesley Stahl who is still kinda sexy after all these years. Despite all the surgery. Grade: B

4. CNN: The worst of the worst. Upside: None No bigger lying pricks on TV including FOX. Grade: Grade: F

5. FOX: Irony and bemusement with their RW 6 foot plus tall anchor babes with great legs bemoaning the loss of George the Second. Brit Hume crying, that shithead whatisnamewhousedtobewithMSNBC arguing that it's not over yet, not by a longshot. Great news for them in a corporate sense because they'll do even better as the opposition network to the Presidency and the new Dem Senate. Upside: Great theater and an opportunity to watch your enemies die slowly in quicksand. Grade: Grade: A-

6. MSNBC: Sick creeps except for Ron Jr., Mrs Greenspan pulling her hair out a la tricotillomania all night and binging and purging. Scarborough shaking his head and bemoaning his candidate with the 2 digit IQ. Better luck next time with...whom? That'll be Tweety's discussion all night. Pure angst mixed with despair and hypocrisy. Lots of interviews with Ralph Reed types. Tweety'll beat up guys like Trippi and won't let them gloat at all whatsoever. Will also demand that Kerry appoint 1/2 Rethugs to his cabinet, since there are no competent Dems out there. Here come the children again. TOTAL BULLSHIT. Grade: D+

7. C-SPAN: Dry but tinged with callers saying things like: I'am going to put away my American Flag for four years until we can get this Commie out of the WH. Grade: C

[blondeatlast]

1. MSNBC gets a C+ from me--they do have "Countdown," which

is an excellent show with Keith Olbermann.

ABC gets as close to an A as can be from me. I'd rather wartch Jennings than anyone on the majors, and Ted Koppel still won't kowtow to the lords and masters.

[PCIntern]

2. I'm referring only to

Election Night...

[blondeatlast]

3. Sorry--there it is, right in your SL too.

I'll watch Lehrer or Jennings--or The Daily Show (thank God that's an alternative!)

[PCIntern]

4. 3 TV's for me -

the 55 incher with whomever seems to be the most reasonable with the sound on, the other two with the closed -captioning with FOX definitely on at all times.

If * is the winner, I am going to have a big drink and a good cry and go to sleep get up for work and go. And cry.

However, when Kerry is declared the landslide victor, I'm gonna whoop and whoop and who knows what else!

[steve2470]

5. can you tell me briefly why CNN is so bad ?

I'm a newbie to this, thanks :-)

[blondeatlast]

6. Not briefly, no--it's impossible.

Using Gallup as their pollster, for a start:

http://www.moveon.org/content/pdfs/Final-Gallup-Ad.pdf

(warning: Adobe pdf)

[steve2470]

7. ah, well they just lost 99 % in my book

the other 1% is their potential for good

[PCIntern]

8. Sure:

I can't possibly construct a complete list but:

CNN is without a doubt the biggest group of misrepresenters and liars on TV. Their so-called reporters including Crowley, Woofwoof, John King, and others ask 'have you stopped beating your wife" questions of Dems continuously, shake their heads during their answers, and make up excuses continuously for Rethugs malfeasance. They repeat WH talking points like they're phrases from the Bible, and never question the veracity of anything coming from the Rethug leadership in Congress, the WH or any legislature in a state which is termed Red. They use code-words which are inflammatory to RWers about 'liberals' like Kerry, Edwards, Daschle, and any female elected Dem, whom they really hate. The so-called commentators, rather than being journalistic, are affiliated with RW org's like the American Enterprise Institute and what's more, the panels they have, with the possible exception of Capital Gang which no one watches because it's on Sat PM when real people are out having dinner, at a movie, or getting laid, are all RW with usually one exception who might best be termed a Rockefeller-Republican, who is branded as the liberal. They lie about polls and utilize numbers which are just fallacious and outliers. I could go on and on, but you get the point - welcome to DU!

[steve2470]

10. geez, thanks !!! Time for a letter to CNN

it may be a 100% waste of time, but you just gave me some great talking points. Thanks !

[Nerdling]

9. POI

You can't fault CNN's uber-pretty graphics and James Earl Jones thundering baritone announcing the titles for America Votes. There's something so melodramatic about it all that only CNN seems to pull off. They even signed up the massively huge NASDAQ video wall in Times Square to show election coverage. They'll also be using the massive video walls on the inside to display many different results at one time. CNN on the technical side is really pulling out all the stops.

You need to just lay off CNN in blanket remarks. They have an incredible technical team and their international reporters are second in reputation to the BBC. They are largely directed by these "new age" bastard producers who are interested in infotainment. Talking heads do what they are told. If they're told to hit an angle then they do it. It's why they wear the earpiece.

I've grown to like my brief glimpses of MSNBC (we see it on CNBC Europe from time to time and broadcasts of it rarely last longer than a few hours) and I may watch some of it on election night. I enjoy how much of it is "flying by the seat of your pants" journalism with nobody really sure if they're going to bother sticking to schedules or not.

Fox... Urgh. They have some great music. But thats it. The most they'll do is buff up some dark red graphics and spinning presidential seal logo's and may fly their entire team to Mexico to escape a kerry-run FCC. Warning: May contain nudity.

ABC - Jennings... *yawn*.... Theres just no passion behind his journalism when its down to the core. I enjoy ABCNews because its very calm and collected but sweet jesus they're boring. They also have an ugly ass set that looks like they set up shop in a warehouse.

CBS: Dan Dan Dan! All Dan all the time. Ratherisms and stern facial expression for upwards of 12 hours at a time. Viewers may wish for the "Apeshit crazy" stage which will happen when you least expect it. This is when Dan orders the camera back onto him and proceeds to launch into an 11 minute untranslatable rant about just why they're doing what they're doing and how much he'd love to see a mudwrestle between the bush girls. Uninteresting set and the graphics wont be great but CBS has a great patriotic score they can use for music.

NBC: BROKAWS LAST STAND. He reminds me of the grandpa from King Of the Hill (I know you see it) and he'll be doing his very damn best to leave a mark on this bad boy election. Possibly culminating in a 6 minute pouting closeup of him explaining the nature of democracy and his experience. Expect slow piano solo at this time and waving american flag in background. NBC has good resources and will use the Rockefeller centre to a gain. Also has some great music.