A parable, in one act

[Timbuk3]

So, the other day, I was walking down the street and stopped to watch an unfolding drama at the theater. In the line, this great big bruiser of a guy kept throwing looks at this little guy who was minding his own business. The big guy looked fat and happy, while the little guy looked like he hadn't eaten in days. Finally, the big guy started shouting at him, "Stop threatening me! Stop threatening me!" The little guy, who hadn't even said anything when the big guy elbowed him out of the way to get in line in front of him, was meakly saying "I don't know what you mean. Look, I don't have any WAY to threaten you." as he turned out his pockets to show he was unarmed (and obviously much smaller.)

The big guy just kept yelling, even though some of the bystanders were starting to tell him to back off a little, give the little guy a chance to talk.

"OK, so you don't have anything in your pockets. Maybe you're hiding a bomb or something in your pants!" screamed the bully.

The little guy took off his pants. He obviously didn't want to get beat up.

The big guy just SCREAMED at him, "How do I know you don't have a gun shoved up your backside?" as he jumped him. He got in the first shot, a nasty low blow that left the poor little starved guy gasping and grabbing at his crotch.

But, much to the surprise of everyone who had been watching, it turned out the little guy must have known Karate, or something. He turned the attack back on the big guy. It was, as near as I could see through the crowd, a fair fight.

All of a sudden, the BIG guy started yelling for help. "Help me! Help me! He's HURTING me!" he wailed. But no one would step forward to help him. We all saw what happened, and we knew who started the fight. (Even though none of us could figure out WHY he'd jumped him.)

Well, it was quite a mess and both of them were pretty bloody by the time the cops arrived in their blue helmets. No one was surprised when they led that big aszhole away in cuffs. Several people joined in to help the little guy gather his things as the paddy wagon drove away. He was OK, although severely bruised and bloody.

Man, was that a scene. I still wonder why it happened. I'm just glad they hauled that big guy off to jail. The world isn't safe with people like that running around loose.