I screamed at my Repug Brother-in-Law at Thanksgiving Dinner

[Laura PourMeADrink]

Did anyone else have to live through Thanksgiving Dinner with repug relatives. They hysterically laughed and mocked me when I suggested election fraud. I swore it was the last time I ever slave in the kitchen all day for my husband's ignorant Texas relatives.

[eleonora]

1. did your husband rise to defend you?

If he didn't and I were you, we'd have a problem.

[Tandalayo_Scheisskopf]

2. You cooked and they laughed?

Laura, get away from those folks. Really.

[Rockerdem]

141. You think YOU were dissed?

How about being cluelessly asked to "say grace"?

[LisaL]

3. I have no Repug Relatives, thank God.

We all voted straight Democratic ticket, little good that it did us.

[TomClash]

4. Sorry, no . . .

. . . they aren't allowed at Thanksgiving dinner. They don't know how to give thanks or eat with forks.

[goddess40]

5. Next time make an ex-lax chocolate cream pie, sit back and enjoy

I avoided the mess and stayed home from my in-laws. But my hubby and kids went. The election did come up in conversation and when my hubby started to talk about all the over votes and how they all went to bush his fascist sister replied in her usually charming and intelligent way "Wah, Wah, Wah". My hubby yelled at his fascist little sister to shut the fuck up - Sorry I missed that part.

Edit: Even her fascist husband didn't defend her nor did my hubby's theocracy voting brother.

[Bake]

10. Ex-Lax Cream Pie! EX-cellent!!!!

PUt THAT on the list for Christmas dinner with the Puke relatives!

BAke

[fujiyama]

104. But don't

give that to 'em at your own house.

You don't want your bathroom messed.

Better to give it to em at a potluck of some sort, preferably at the freeper relative's own house!

[LiberalFighter]

20. Personally... I would rebut that she must have such good morals that

include fraud, cheating and lying.

[Laura PourMeADrink]

My husband was on the fence during the election. We had many heated

debates. He is a reasoned person, but his Texas ties are strong. I have showed him many fraud articles, but he's cautious. Trust me, as far as democrats I know go, none of them know much at all about any fraud issues since the news blackout. So I am sure no repugs do either. I still think we should concentrate on informing Democrats not Repubs since they won't believe us anyway.

[Name removed]

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[Name removed]

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[Loki]

8. I'm a democrat in the middle of Texas republican hell.

Everyone on our street is a repuke, and we have a big sign in our garage, where all the men like to come to talk that says " You can't spell bullshit without B-U-S-H", and guess what, no one mentions his name here. There is something to that old style Texas heritage that gives you grudging respect when you stand up for your beliefs and won't suffer fools. Stay armed with the facts and truth, they are your best friends.

[marions ghost]

30. Story from a Red State Also

Yep, ya gotta stand up to em. My Dad's repub relatives tried to pick on him before the election saying, "we think you might just be a...LIB-er-al..." (sneer, sneer...jab, jab)

My 78 yr old Dad smiled back real wide and said, "you know, I'm not only a Liberal--I'm a Radical." They backed off real quick.

You have to be strong.

[AspenRose]

79. They don't expect "libruls" to fight back

They're taught by their Reich Wing radio leaders that "libruls" are spineless and won't fight back.

Of course, when Dems DO fight back, after they get over the shock, repugs then resort to the "wild-eyed and uncontrollable" meme.

Just stick to your guns.

[Name removed]

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[Bake]

11. Are you saying she should have "made nice" with them?

If so, I have two words for you -- guess what they are ...

Anybody who comes into MY house, where WE made dinner for them, and starts a bunch of shit like that can get the hell out; the quicker the better. They're not welcome.

Fortunately, my Puke relatives didn't mention it at all. No gloating, no politics of any kind. It was at least bearable.

Bake

[Name removed]

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[Bake]

18. Sorry, but "loved ones" don't laugh hysterically at you!

Sounds to me like Laura was just defending herself. She was the HOSTESS, remember? Her GUESTS laughed hysterically at her.

There ARE other things besides politics, but sometimes -- like when the nation is edging past the crossroad, politics moves up to the No. 1 slot on the priority list.

Bake

[Name removed]

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[Missy Vixen]

22. What?

>Life is too short.

Or...Just keep spreading the hate...<

I guess it's more important to preserve the sham of "family" when one's "family" is completely unable to treat another family member who opened her home to them, cooked a meal, served it and cleaned up after it, with nothing but contempt? No thanks. I'd rather dine with complete strangers (who often treat us with more courtesy and respect than our "family",) than anyone like the above.

LauraPYB, do yourself a favor. Tell the "family" that you have entertained them for the last holiday. Start making plans with your husband and kids for an alternate celebration.

Life is too short to spend any of it at all with people who don't deserve your company and your kindness.

Julie

[Bake]

23. Right on! Sounds like Grandma "clotheslined" Laura!

But I guess that's ok, huh ... sheesh!

Family that acts like Laura's did isn't worth the name "family." I'd much rather share dinner with kind-hearted, like-minded souls (like us on DU, e.g.).

Bake

[Name removed]

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[spooky3]

26. The issue is not politics; the issue is complete lack of regard for

Laura and her feelings.

If the Repug relatives felt that they could not agree with or even listen to their views, a loving response would be something along the lines of "gee, I know we have different views on politics--let's talk about something else. How is Janey doing in school this year?"

[Cheswick2.0]

27. oh barf

stop with the bullshit moralizing. Or maybe you resemble their remarks?

[CatWoman]

61. you ain't seen NOTHING yet

that poster flies from thread to thread, spreading her Hints from Hell.

[SammyWinstonJack]

66. Maybe the ignore feature is needed for this poster?

:think: ;-)

[CatWoman]

68. yeah, unfortunately I had to wait for another of her inane,

preachy posts to appear before I could add her to my list.

[Cheswick2.0]

74. lol,

Have you noticed that some democrats only agree with the trolls? Weirdest DU phenomenon ever.

[CatWoman]

82. they agree with them, and then try to shame everyone else

with their "tut-tuts" and off the wall bullshit.

If they really want to change the world, and address the REAL haters, they should spread their wisdom on Republican boards. Not condemn Democrats for standing up to the hate.

[Debs]

34. I say

You remain civil to people until they start being uncivil to you. At that point you stand up for yourself. Having self control does not mean you have to take abuse from others. If they want to talk intelligently fine. If they dont want to talk at all fine. But it THEY are going to become abusive, there is no reason to just take it in order to maintain some semblance civility. Why should SHE have to swallow her pride in her home because her relatives want to act like jerks. They need to understand the ultimate lesson of life. Actions have consequences

[SemperEadem]

36. this is the second thread I've read this week

where the homeowner was treated like a squatter in her own home by family--and was chided here for not being more pliant with beligerant family members with "family is so important". As my daughter says, "Boo!".

I don't know when people forgot that when invited to another's home, if one isn't capable of respecting that person in their home, then one should keep their butt at home. Being family in no way gives anyone the right to disrespect the family member into whose home they've been invited. Period. That demonstrates such a lack of class and home training.

[charlie]

37. No kidding

I've got lifelong friends who are hardcore Republicans and we trash each other over our differences all the time. But when I'm in a friend's home, I mind my fucking manners and they do the same for me. This is all about simple common decency, not politics.

[EnfantTerrible]

41. I agree with Laura

so much so that I won't be spending Christmas with my Rethuglican family or any other holiday for that matter. Some people (myself included) believe that you are what you believe and that what you believe can't be compartmentalized into "this is politics and that is family". Now in my case I believe that anyone who supported Bush with votes and contributions has aided and abetted a criminal. A murdering, war-mongering, criminal. I wouldn't want to associate with anyone who helped someone commit these attrocities... family or no. In fact it's more painful when it is your family. Laura has something called the courage of her convictions. While you assert that elections come and go, so, it would seem, do your convictions.

[Ladyhawk]

130. This is the hard decision I had to make.

Everyone I know locally is a *-supporter. I'm back to square one and lonely as hell. But the toxicity became too much to take.

[EnfantTerrible]

133. I know how lonely it is

But there is always DU. And you've got me. PM me when things get rough... we'll commiserate.

[foreigncorrespondent]

51. Excuse me!!!

But who made you God? What makes you think you have the right to tell someone what they should and shouldn't do with their family? It is THEIR family and THEIR decision to make, NOT yours.

I don't recall Laura asking for help about what she should do. I recall Laura asking if anyone else experienced similar problems to her own.

[Tsiyu]

53. "Yeah That IS right- write them off"

Mr Reality, you are so correct.

I have "written off" all the repukes in my life, and believe me, I feel SOOOO much better.

Woe to those who call evil good and good evil. That's all I can say. Why would I want to be friends or family with those who don't care if my kids are drafted or if I've lost my job or if our Constitution is only a dim, sacred memory? Why would I want my children around them?

I have a strong feeling that lightning is gonna strike some of these folks. Too much negative, toxic karma surrounds the greedy Repukes. I'm not standin' next to 'em. They made their choices, they can suffer the consequences while I stay busy surviving.

[Name removed]

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[Moonbeam_Starlight]

85. And you mean to tell me

you'd put up with the kind of treatment Laura described in your own home after you cooked for them?

Again, if you would you are a TOTAL weenie and probably deserve their treatment if you can't stand up for yourself.

I don't let people treat me like shit, period. Much less in my own home.

[Name removed]

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[Moonbeam_Starlight]

100. Ah I see

you can't handle being told you are a weenie, so you've got to blow the whole thread off as fictional?

No, again, I would not let people sit in my house and insult me, mock me and laugh at me. No way. That's just WRONG no matter if it's about politics or anything else.

I have no frigging idea why you would be defending the boorish behavior of these people....

...no wait, maybe I do.

[Name removed]

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[Moonbeam_Starlight]

109. I think the better question would be

are YOU a Democrat?

And you still haven't answered my question: WHY would you be defending such boorish behavior? Would you tolerate people treating you like that?

If so, shame on you.

[WoodrowFan]

122. an even better question..

an even better question..

did they get granite or marble on their tombstone???...

[Moonbeam_Starlight]

125. LOL!

Mmmm, looks sort of granite-ish.

[WoodrowFan]

126. probably styrofoam

I heard Skinner got a bargin buying up unused fake ones after halloween at Spencer's Gifts...

[Geek_Girl]

134. I feel the same

I can't help but think what comes around goes around. The sad part is for some of my co-workers and friends I'm afraid they my be drafted and killed. Which is a high price to pay for being gullible.

[Walt Starr]

59. NOW YOU'RE GETTING IT!!!!!!

Life is definitely too short to spend any time concerned about those who are your mortal enemies by their deeds.

[foreigncorrespondent]

50. Oh please!

By the way you talk then, my partner should remain in close contact with her cousin, who after many months of my partner talking to her about the FACTS of everything over the last four years, still went out and voted for Bush*. Even after she said she wouldn't.

On top of that, she then tried to tell my partner that gay rights are moving along quite nicely in the U.S. Hello? Is this cousin living on a different planet to myself and my partner?

Things really aren't ok. The next four years are going to be hell, if we all manage to survive that long. These repubes aren't even informed on the facts. All they do is listen to what the right wing spin machine tells them. The don't do any home work to try to find out exactly what is going on. Then after an election they "won" they begin a site on the Internet telling the world just how sorry they aren't for their vote. Have you ever heard of the term "ugly American?" Because as an Aussie who has come across many "ugly Americans" in her time I can honestly tell you, that the people that do the kind of things above are the assholes who have given you all such a bad reputation when you travel.

Don't sit here and begin telling us that family is more important, because you know what? When a family begins to vote for people who go against everything you are, then that family isn't exactly looking out for you are they?

Try being in a queer persons shoes right about now and being told by a religious right wing bitch, that everything is going to be fine. Try being in my partners shoes hearing this on THANKSGIVING and looking next to her on the dinner table and seeing an empty space where I am meant to be. What did she have to be Thankful for?

Everyone in my family who votes against my rights, no longer have me in their family. I walk and I will continue walking, because having them in my life isn't worth the heartache they put me through.

[CatWoman]

62. at least she didn't run all thru this thread yelling

"this is hyperbol"

[Name removed]

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[Moonbeam_Starlight]

86. Why didn't you sigh again at the end of that post?

I was getting quite used to the constant sighing.

[Name removed]

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[SpaceCatMeetsMars]

55. It's the dittoheads in my family who keep bringing up the politics

and spewing the hate. My husband and I don't bring up politics or religion, but the dittoheads will never stop bringing it up, that or else they start yakking about "inferior" countries. This time we kept changing the subject, trying to make it clear we didn't want to talk about politics, but it didn't matter.

These people have split personalities. Sometimes they seem like decent people and the rest of the time they are hateful, big-mouthed, bigoted, ignorant bores, like their heroes, Limbaugh, O'Reilly, Hannity, Coulter, etc.

I used to like these people, but for the past few years, we go to visit them from obligation, but don't even want to go. Who wants to hear their ignorance and hate?

Also let me add: We no longer go on the real holidays. We get it over with ahead of time and spend peaceful holidays ourselves. I refuse to spend tense holidays trying to placate people who act like unpleasant, bullying "heathers."

[Patiod]

112. Why is that?

I don't bring up politics, but the dittoheads HAVE to talk about their point of view, even after I've tried to change the subject.

I think they believe that if they just TALK AT me enough, I'll realize the error of my ways.

[SpaceCatMeetsMars]

120. It's always one-sided

I noticed that they never want to listen to another point of view or have a civil discussion. They just want to push buttons and jab and get a rise out of you. So we decided not to give them the satisfaction. It's pointless to try to have a discussion with people that just want to have some kind of emotional drama.

I wish I could understand what they are so angry about all the time. They are so privileged compared to most people in the world, but they seem to think they are entitled to more and are furious about something, but who knows what?

When we tried to understand and asked them before the election why they were voting for Bush, they never gave one factual reasoned thought, they actually repeated the following things:

"He's keeping us safe."

"It just goes back to who you'd rather have a beer with."

"Kerry is a flip-flopper"

"The Swift Boat Veterans said....."

I can't really understand them at all, all I know is they enjoy believing a bunch of lies and feeling like they are superior to people.

[Quill Pen]

127. They've been well-taught the Noise Machine gambit...

They spew enough crap to provoke their liberal companions, then declare the justified indignance in the liberal response "hate speech." Then they pretend like their sh*t doesn't stink and they've never uttered a rough word in their lily-white little lives; therefore, the liberals must be either insane or trash or both.

"GASP!! Can you believe it? After we said Kerry was a Hanoi-Jane-loving traitor and a flip-flopping coward who hated America and disgraced veterans, she actually said, 'Bush is a liar'?!? How could she speak so disrespectfully of our President?"

[SpaceCatMeetsMars]

143. Exactly! It's like they didn't spend the entire 1990s saying insane things

about Clinton -- the supposed murders and drug runs and all that. But back then they didn't dwell on the silliness so much, so we would just shake our heads and didn't think too much about it. We never even botherd to reply to it, because it made so little sense.

But now they are so different and their lives are so different and they come out and say so much more rotten stuff and act like insensitive zombies. The little control issues they had have turned into big ones and they act like defiant, angry bullies. But I don't know why they feel the need to act defiant. There is definitely something cult-like about the whole thing.

And the thing that makes the least sense is they KNOW what Bush is like and what he has done, but they just love him anyway. There's something so sick about it.

[Walt Starr]

58. Sorry, I have no "loved ones" who voted for Bush

Any family members that ignorant have been written off long ago by me. They are dead to me.

I consider things that serious. Only enemies would vote for that man.

[Moonbeam_Starlight]

87. Yep.

[Reality Not Tin Foil]

98. Come on Walt...

...I've seen your posts, you're a reasonable guy. You don't blow smoke like many of these clowns.

"Dead to me" is not something that you'll treasure stating in later years...You know that.

[Walt Starr]

99. Oh I DO treasure the statement

I have no tiome for anybody who voted for Bush. Anybody who voted for Bush is my mortal enemy. Nothing more, regardless of relationship or whatever.

[Reality Not Tin Foil]

101. I guess I just can't fathom...

My mom is a lifelong puke (I refer to her as a Republican, of course). And I was there for Thanksgiving...Our biggest concern was getting her moved into her new house.

I'm quite passionate about politics here, online, and personally take the subject very seriously, but I refuse to allow it to dominate my entire life.

Maybe I'm different...Or then again, maybe not. I sense a lot of internet bluster here.



"Mortal"?? Come on, Walt!

[Walt Starr]

111. Yes, I chose the correct word

MORTAL enemy.

It has come to that. Anybody who previously was related to me by blood who voted Republican this last election is dead to me now.

You cannot fathom now, but you will. You will.

[someday]

142. i like your style...

thiz board rOx:D

[yorkiemommie1]

148. same here

n/t

[HootieMcBoob]

73. so she should let people walk all over her?

you better get rid of that Howard Dean avatar.

[Reality Not Tin Foil]

97. No. She should call Maxx Power.

And what's with the suggestion on the Dean avatar??

[CatWoman]

113. slimy bitch. about time

[Name removed]

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[Name removed]

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[zanana]

60. So then we should all just shut up?

You have to fight fire with fire. No exceptions.

[Coventina]

76. Excuse me, but.....

Family DOES go....to war!!!!

You want to tell the families of dead American servicepeople that their death is NOT related to politics?!?!?!?

"Politics" is more than chat over brandy and cigars, my friend.
The Bush cabal is affecting EVERY ASPECT of our lives!!!!!

Every person who voted for Bush is my mortal enemy, and I'm NOT going to back off from telling them that. No matter WHO they are!!

[Moonbeam_Starlight]

83. Excuse me but did you notice

SHE cooked and then THEY mocked her and laughed at her for her views???

Hello! Would YOU continue serving them the food you cooked with them treating you like crap?

If so, you need a spinal cord transplant.

[ColumbiaCowboy]

75. There's a time and place for political disagreement

I'd think for a few important holidays you could put family ahead of nastiness over politics.
Disagree with them, work hard to elect Democrats, but starting a fight at the dinner table on Thanksgiving serves no positive purpose, it's just petty.
We ought to spend the day being thankful that we live in a great country where we can reasonably have disagreements on some issues and still love our country and hope for what's best for it.
One loses an awful lot of friends and family if they're incapable of being civil towards people with whom they disagree on politics.

[Moonbeam_Starlight]

88. Who said SHE

started the fight, right winger ColumbiaCowboy (you aren't fooling me, I've been looking at a lot of your posts this morning)?

Who said she started it?

Looks like they were mocking her and laughing at her. Why are THEY not held responsible in this scenario?

Why are bush voters allowed to act like assholes but we have to just bend over and take it?

Bullshit. I'd have kicked them out so fast it'd make their heads spin. You don't laugh at and mock someone who just slaved over your Thanksgiving dinner.

Damn. How BASIC is that that a couple of the posters on this thread don't understand it?

[CatWoman]

89. I've been noticing a pattern

one, two, maybe three "newbies" show up in a thread, arguing against the thread's author using "you should be better than that" logic, and then disrupting the thread to the point that it turns into a flamewar.

[Moonbeam_Starlight]

90. Yep, I've been noticing the SAME thing

and the funny thing is, they think we don't see it.

Oh all this feel good, let's join hands and sing Kumbayah bullshit is just being spewed by them because of ONE reason:

They really hate to think of all those chickens coming home to roost on THEM.

Well, too fucking bad, I say.

[CatWoman]

93. and it doesn't help when DUers encourage them

which happens a lot, too.

[Name removed]

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[MissB]

107. You know what is really funny, CatWoman?

The person that you and Moonbeam are arguing with isn't someone that I can read. Must have them on iggy for a reason. :shrug:

[CatWoman]

114. I had her on ignore

and took her off so that I may relish her tombstone

[MissB]

115. Dang!

Now I have to go clean out my iggy list! Every few months it needs a good cleaning. Usually most of them are tombstoned.

[Name removed]

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[Moonbeam_Starlight]

110. Who's lost their mind?

Let's look at what you've stated in this thread:

If someone comes to your house as your guests and you cook for them and host the dinner, if they laugh at you and mock your beliefs, you would just smile sweetly and say "thank you sir, may I have another?"

Is that right? If it's not it sure is the impression you are giving here.

Or I suppose you'd make a pinky chain with them and sing Kumbayah while they laugh at you in your house, eating the food you prepared?

Again, WHY would you tolerate such rude behavior from ANYONE (forget the politics)???

Why?

Try answering that instead of engaging in HYPERBOLE about shooting grandma or clotheslining grandma. I think it's interesting this pattern you have of blaming the wrong person in this scenario. Not a word have you said about the priggish behavior of her guests.

My suspicion is that your sympathy lies with THEM. You've said nothing to contradict that notion.

On edit: you are either a repub who quite agrees with her guests behavior OR you are a Democrat who doesn't stand up for themselves when other people are being obviously hateful to you and making fun of your beliefs. Either way, is pretty bad. I almost hope it's the former and not the latter, because Democrats like that do NOTHING to help the rest of us except make right wingers think we'll tolerate any kind of disgusting treatment they dish out.

[Laura PourMeADrink]

138. What broke my composure was when they were praising....

"CON"deleeza Rice. How wonderful it was for black people and how proud they should be. Then I said, "From what I understand, most black people hate her. She stands for everything they are against. She also did nothing to stop an "ordinary" highjacking (her own words) on 9/11"

That shut them up for a while until they were laughing about how the democrats are blaming everything on *. Even personally killing people. And how wonderful it is that we didn't have to live through Kerry ruining the wonderful things * started.

Then I said, "It's not over yet, you know. The counting hasn't finished in Ohio." That is when they laughed hysterically mocking me and I lost it.

So you see. I lost my cool. But I dislike them all so much now. But, they are my husband's family, from a small town in Texas and I have to exist with them for a long time. Unfortunately, my democrat family is all in CT. Bad thing about marrying someone from another state. The woman usually moves to where the man lives. UGH

[m berst]

123. I disagree

This misrepresents the position that many of us find ourselves in with family, friends and co-workers and clients. We HAVE been putting these relationships ahead of politics for 30 years and have gotten nothing but abuse and ridicule and harassment and threats in return, and this mistreatment is now escalating.

"One loses an awful lot of friends and family if they're incapable of being civil toward people with whom they disagree on politics."

Bullshit. That is inoperative, and it has been made inoperative by the constant bullying by people of us, not the other way around. It is being used as blackmail against many of us - "keep taking it on the chin or you will lose friends and relatives."

I have never gone out of my way looking for right wingers to hassle, in my family, at work or anywhere else. I would be more than happy to live and let live. They have sought us out.

The problem is that we as liberals, as artists, as intellectuals, as African Americans, as GLBT people - WE are not being allowed to go about OUR lives without continual threats and harassment, and what we are talking about here is standing up to that.

While Walt's sentiments may sound harsh, I completely support his stance. The only way to deal with bullies is to stand up to them. Voting for Bush is a vote for bullies, and for most people an act of bullying. We are not obligated to "get along" with bullies. If bullies want US in THEIR lives, then THEY need to do the compromising, not us.

[Ladyhawk]

131. I've been taking it on the chin for years.

My mother = the passive-aggressive martyr, who decided I was demon-possessed, harbored a fugitive from the law, drove me all around the county yelling at me because I "used Jesus' name in vain." This is the woman who yelled at me for saying, "My fucking eyes hurt" when I was blind from an operation and wasn't sure it would turn out OK. She confronted me then and there about my atheism and yelled and screamed. I had nowhere to go.

SHE is the one doing all the immoral things, but becomes unglued if I use a swear word or two. I won't take it anymore, goddammit!

And she voted for Bush, that lying, thieving, cheating, murdering son-of-a-bitch! A vote for Bush is a vote to put me in a grave. He is going to cut my social security disability. Then what? Go back to live with my mother. I DON'T FUCKING THINK SO!!!!

[Cheswick2.0]

13. what's the problem?

[pop goes the weasel]

9. how rude of them

I hope you told them to their faces that you will never cook for them again. If not, send them a letter telling them that the next time they come to visit, they had better be buying their own dinner and renting hotel rooms.

[Riptide]

12. I had a horrible T-Giving experience with the Repukes...

I went to my husband's brother's house. Dh's family is republican, and dh is the only liberal. Well, dh's family didn't say anything to me, but brother-in-law's wife's family was there and they are total freepers.

One of her brothers gloated for about 15 minutes. I let him get it out of his system, then I told him I wasn't interested in talking about the election anymore. I really just wanted to avoid a scene.

Well, he kept on and on. Then, another guy (not a brother, just a friend of BIL) started in on me. I was called a socialist, a communist, immoral, and was told that my husband was a nice guy until he got involved with me (we have been married for 15 years and have 3 children!) My husband was not around for this conversation.

My father was also there (he had joined us at my in-laws since my mother died) We are originally from Canada, and one of them started bad mouthing Canada to my dad, for about 20 minutes. Finally, my dad said, "You know what, I have sat here for 20 minutes listening to you disparage my country, and I have had enough. I have not said anything bad about the United States, but you have insulted my country non-stop. That makes you a dick."

So, we left shortly after that. My husband and I agreed that it was our last holiday with the Repukes. I spent the whole evening being insulted and degraded.

[Cheswick2.0]

17. I hope you let them know

tell them you won't be coming back and why. Tell them that you will accept their apology when they realize how right you were.

[Bake]

24. Good for you!

I was waiting to see whether your husband defended you. Get the heck outta there, and don't go back.

What a pack of assholes.

Bake

[Justice]

29. I admire your father's restraint. He could have said alot more.

[merbex]

35. I feel for you and your family

At my house(all dems) we actually speculated that the election was probably topic #1 every where across America and we prayed that Dems could hold their own against Repug gloating.

We knew that dems at DU could definitely hold their own

Happier Holidays are ahead of you

[SemperEadem]

38. they must have been drunk before you got there

at the end of the day, what did they accomplish? They didn't make you change your mind... they didn't make you decide to see things their way--in fact, it probably grounded you further in your own convictions. It was a power trip they were on--sort of like those prison guards at Abu Ghraib... because no one had the power to check them--like the BIL whose house you were at should have just for the sake of familial peace--they got bold in their bullshit.

And persecuting your dad because you're from Canada isn't going to change the fact the he's Canadian--so what was the point? It wasn't enough that the BIL's friend was stupid, he had to take it all the way to imbicile for everyone to see.

[SharonAnn]

44. I love it! "That makes you a dick."

Kind of closes any discussion.

[Quill Pen]

132. Good freakin' night!

I used to have some unpleasant Thanksgivings and Christmases with my ex-BF's insufferable, arrogant, insulting dick of a brother and his fretful, chinless, whiny little hausfrau of a wife, but yours really takes the cake. How humiliating and awful.

Sounds like your holidays in the future are destined to be delightful. Holidays are golden moments not to be wasted on the toxic.

[Arkana]

149. I'd like to shake your father's hand

Seriously, that is the best way to close off ANY argument. "That makes you a dick."

[LoZoccolo]

14. Two things to remember for the future (hardline according to LoZoccolo)...

1. You've got to get to the point where if you know you know what you know (this has to be more than just that some people on DU talk about it all the time), you don't care if people laugh. Strengthen your inner elitist. ;)
2. If you didn't have a few specific examples of the fraud in mind, you should have maybe one or two things to cite to bring the discussion offline. Always have something that they don't know that can be verified easily, so you can tell them they don't know what they're talking about until they look it up. Plus you know it's sitting out there, waiting to blow up in their face, which goes a long way towards diffusing any ridicule they might try to heap on you (which they can't because you know better).

[goddess40]

16. What's the plan for Christmas, Hanukkah or winter solstice?

I think I'm staying home again but since the school vacation is longer I'll probably go after the pukes leave. My FIL and MIL are Dems, it's just a couple of their nine kids I can't stand and won't put up with any longer.

It isn't just hubby's family but my sister as well. She took the fascist hook that was baited with the promise of a Christian Theocracy.

[SemperEadem]

42. invite only Dems and Liberals to you home

absolutely no repugs... and tell the repugs that they already got their xmas gift--more job outsourcing, rising health care costs, government intrusion, increased taxes on the middle class, corporate welfare--when they elected bonehead.

[Laura PourMeADrink]

21. Good Advice LoZoccolo-I just get too emotional about this..

You are right. I have read a lot of facts/articles about the fraud -but I get too frustrated. No one wants to listen and I can not get past the mocking...

[Jack_DeLeon]

28. I dont get people who ruin holidays with talk of politics...

from either side.

[OneMoreDemocrat]

32. I took this Thanksgiving as a chance to apologize to...........

my Republican Brother-in-Law for a screaming match we had last summer when he came to visit....he ended up apologizing as well.

I think I did it because the depth of the despair I was feeling after Black Tuesday was really beginning to eat at me and I wanted to somehow symbolically try to begin to put it behind me.

For whatever reason, once I did it I felt less hardened and more open to accepting what appears to be reality for the next four years.

I'm glad I did it.

[NaturalHigh]

46. I'm with you.

I'd like to think that I did a pretty good job of steering the topic away from politics at the table this year.

[Scrooge]

31. poor thing

You poor thing. You must be so pissed at your husband for not calling off the attack dogs!!

[muse]

33. I hope you read Maureen Dowd on the New York Times website today.

It's all about how she has to put up with her Republican family at holidays. She laid into them. It's pretty obvious she has finally had enough of them. I recommend it; I think you will be able to relate.

[otohara]

40. This Is Also Good - By Joe Conason - Let Them Eat Poundcake

Let them eat poundcake - By Joe Conason
How to take the gloat out of your Republican relatives over Thanksgiving dinner.

Nov. 25, 2004 | Avoiding political arguments with Republican relatives may be the best way to enjoy Thanksgiving. But what's best isn't always what's possible. In the election's immediate aftermath -- and following a big meal and a few drinks -- your most dearly beloved conservatives may not be able to resist the urge to gloat. They may even begin to lecture you about the bright future that awaits us all as George W. Bush fulfills his "mandate."

Rather than start screaming about the bloody debacle in Iraq, the nasty campaign against gays, or the pillaging of the environment, just smile and nod until your favorite 'winger pauses for breath (or a bite of pie). Then say, "I hope you're right, of course, for everybody's sake. But have you heard about the President's economic plans?"

As soon as you have everybody's attention, politely explain what Bush and his administration plan to do to the gullible middle-class voters who re-elected him. Remind them how the President promised to make taxes "fairer" and "simpler," to make health care more widely available and to cut the deficit in half.

http://www.salon.com/opinion/conason/2004/11/25/thanksgiving/index.html

you may have to watch an ad to view entire article, but well worth it!

[otohara]

39. There's A Reason Why We Call Them Morans

here no evil, see no evil - when the evil is who they voted for.


Don't go back there -

[mitchum]

43. You should have told him to get the fuck out of your house...

and go back to his Texas hellhole

[Larkspur]

45. You should have given him an Army enlistment form

and be surprised at why he was attending Thanksgiving Dinner with you instead of flying over to Iraq to be cannon fodder for Bush's war.

Army recruitment is way down

http://www.ariannaonline.com/forums/showthread.php?t=14272
Army's Recruiters Miss Target
For Enlistees in Latest Month

Reserves Fall 45% Short
Of Goal, While Gap Is 30%
In Regular Force Sign-Ups
By CHRISTOPHER COOPER and GREG JAFFE
Staff Reporters of THE WALL STREET JOURNAL
October 20, 2004; Page A7

For the second straight year, U.S. Army recruiters fell short of their goal for signing up enlistees in the first month of a new recruiting cycle.

For the first 30-day period in its new recruiting year, the Army was 30% shy of its goal of signing up 7,274 recruits. The Army had a particularly hard time recruiting for the Army Reserve, on which the Pentagon has relied heavily in Iraq and Afghanistan. Enlistments for the reserves were 45% below the target.

In the same period last year, the Army came up 25% short in its goal in the first month for enlisting 6,220 regular recruits and 40% short of its reserve enlistment goal.
<SNIP>

[Andromeda]

47. Save yourself some grief...

and don't cook for them anymore.

Is your husband a Democrat? Maybe he could have neutralized the situation.

Try to forget about it. It sounds like they are willfully ignorant and there's nothing you can do about that.

[norml]

48. Be sure to send them some lumps of coal for Christmas.

It's so traditional.

[Piperay]

49. How rude

to come to your home, eat the food you prepared and then be insulting to you, those people need to learn some manners. x(

[Darth_Kitten]

52. They are heartless crumbs....

they don't deserve your effort, you are too classy.

[TexasSissy]

54. I purposely avoided Thanksgiving w/Repub relatives.

Am glad I did.

[TrustingDog]

92. haven't seen my 'repug' canadian inlaws for some time now!

and I'm sooooo happy!

They are conspicuous consuming gluttonies, free trade loving, sweat shop loving, meddling gossiping assholes. They're exactly what some of you people describe for your Thanksgiving nightmare dinners.

[RegexReader]

136. now I'm glad I had the flu and stayed home in bed

because it seems preferable to this.

RegexReader
$USA =~ s/Republican/Democrat/ig;

[moderate_hero]

56. Mine was the same way with a twist...

See, I voted for Nader and I had my Democrat family members turn on me. I tried to get them to at least admit he deserved the opportunity to be at the national debates, but they only shouted more. I went out onto the deck with a bottle and watched the sun set on this fascist nation.

[WoodrowFan]

57. we behaved

My Mom asked her husband (my step Dad I guess) to not discuss politics and I didn't either. The closest we came was when during a historical discussion at dinner I was asked my "professional opinion" on who was the worst President in US history. I just looked serious and said something like "it's hard to say, but there are a couple obvious choices." My wife grinned and my step-dad just looked uncomfortable.

[CBHagman]

64. I think you have a career in diplomacy ahead of you.

That's a graceful response to a potentially explosive situation.

[WoodrowFan]

121. Diplomacy

Thank you.. :)

"Diplomacy: the art of saying 'nice doggie' while you grope for a rock."

[Sparkle]

63. Too bad you didn't spit in their food.

I know it's gross but what the hell....

[Mutley]

65. Most of my family are republican....

My dad, stepmother ,and I are the only democrats. At one point my stepmother's cousin made a remark about "unpatriotic liberals" and my dad and I just shoved food in our mouths and my stepmother changed the subject.

[GumboYaYa]

67. At my parents-in-law house, I got into trouble.

We were having a very pleasant conversation and the topic of the fight at the NBA basketball game came up. One of my wife's Aunts then asked if I had seen the new video game where players assassinate Kenedy, to which I replied, "yes, it is just another example of how violent our society is becoming."

My father-in-law, a die-hard Repuke with whom I have had many email arguments resulting from unsolicited right-wing emails sent to me and my wife, interjected, and I quote, "I noticed all this violence when the 'gals' started getting jobs and competing with the men for the men's jobs. You could see it in their faces." Then he made a mean face and went arghhh, like he was showing us how all these violent women act.

I couldn't take it. I responded by saying that is just absurd, it is ridiculous to blame working women for violence in our society when they are simply struggling for equal rights. Maybe women have that ugly face because they are expected to work and hold a job, where they get less pay than their male counterparts, but they still have to be responsible for childcare and taking care of the home. Maybe they are just frustrated from the pressure of trying to get the kids to school and sitters and everthying else they do while still holding their jobs. If there was ever a case of blaming the victims this is it.

Dinner was over, so I got up left the table and played with my kids. I refused to even talk to him at all after that, knowing that if I did, it would turn into an argument.

My wife is furious at me, despite the fact that she has done and said much worse to my family with my full support.

I can't bring myself to apologize yet, as I am still offended by what he said. In the past we have had good relations despite political differences. Now I wonder whether we will ever get back to that point.

[Chimpanzee]

77. Please don't apologize until he does

[cmd]

70. They were outnumbered and kept quiet

The majority discussed our disgust in the kitchen. Later when my brother complained about the high cost of gas, my SIL hissed to him, " You can thank your president for that." I love that woman.

[JohnOneillsMemory]

72. Assholes are tiring. But we do need to EDUCATE our Fallow Merkins.

We need to learn how to speak to those who are so terribly disinformed about the current crop of war criminals.

Face the parade of ignorance and start redirecting the march to extinction we're on.

Smile and stick with facts. Know your shit. Start with our own families at the holidays and work up to strangers on the street.

WE MUST CHANGE PEOPLE'S MINDS OR WE ARE FUCKED, PEOPLE.
NO GETTING FLUSTERED AND COPPING OUT AND GIVING UP. NOT AN OPTION.

[blueblitzkrieg]

78. So sorry, I had a similar experience.

I had Thanksgiving at my parents' house in Roswell, NM (Repuke country). We had family and neighbors all over for dinner, about 20 people, and in the middle of dinner, my racist, homophobic repuke brother said snottily, "I heard you vote for Kerry." I said, "Of course" at which the whole table began to attack me and trash John Kerry. One neighbor I had never even MET before that day said I must have been brainwashed by my professors at school. :eyes: I tried to fight back but they were so condescending and hateful, I finally just said, "It's obvious this table is full of Republicans so I'm not getting anywhere" and gave up!

The next day I got in a fight with my dad who was spouting every RW talking point. "Michael Moore is a liar and a propagandist." Is Rush Limbaugh, Dad? "No, because he tells the truth!" :eyes: He then said 9/11 was all Clinton's fault and the Swiftboaters were right, which sent me over the edge. Big fight and I immediately packed my shit and left back to school (I was planning on staying until Sunday).

I would have been happy not talking politics and having a decent weekend, but they kept bringing it up (especially my brother) and trying to put me down for not walking in step with the GOP.

I am not very thankful for my family right now and am honestly pretty hurt. Even if they don't respect what I believe, they should be able to show me the least bit of courtesy and not berate me. I do not think I will be going home for Christmas.

[vetwife]

80. You are a better person than me !

I would have said Happy Thanksgiving. Given them the Turkey (flying or not, I don't know) and said. Go ! I am not your servant. I respect my husband but I will not be disrespected in my own home. I won't argue. You will leave. This is my house, my kitchen, my meal, and your WERE my guests. I will not tolerate another word. This is not what Thanksgiving is about and until some folks learn, then stay away from me. I hope your husband would have defended you and if he didn't..Well..there would have been problems. If this was not your home, I would have left. No......it starts with a turkey and ends up running your life and being incosiderate of your feelings.
Been there done that. Ask my husband how long it has been since he has contact with any of his family who crossed up with me continually when we first married trying to run our lives. 15 years ! One brother..Thats it. That is all we associate with. We moved 350 miles away and have no contact. His choice. My gladness !

[Moonbeam_Starlight]

81. Wait, let me get this straight:

YOU cooked, then they laughed at you and mocked you for your views?

Buh-bye! No one does that to me in MY house. See ya! Don't let the door hit ya! Go get your turkey dinner somewhere else.

Seriously, that was hard CORE rude of them.

[xerox]

91. Yep

It was painful!

[Virginian]

95. Did anyone else have to live through Thanksgiving Dinner with repug relati

I did.
I haven't seen my half-sister in nearly a year. I know that she has been listening to the fundies. She came to Thanksgiving dinner.
She asked what was new and I told her I had worked the election. She asked me if I had changed any Kerry votes to Bush.

I responded, "Why would I do that, I wanted KERRY to win and he won my precinct by 58% to Bush's 40%" I don't think she was expecting that kind of response.

She told me she couldn't vote for Kerry because she didn't trust him. "And you can trust Bush???" I said incredulously. She got into the Viet Nam war stuff in which I have a 12 year age advantage. I told her that O'Neil was paid by Nixon to get Kerry after the war (because Kerry was a protester) and he is still trying. The Swiftboat guys stories had all been discredited.

I told her she was too young, but I remembered 1972 and everyone was against the war by then, except maybe some crazy Rambos. It had started losing popular support in 1968. It killed LBJ's political career. All the guys I knew prayed for high lottery numbers so they wouldn't get drafted. Hardly anyone volunteered for the service. It bacame uncool for kids to play with cap pistols and no one wanted their kids to play Army anymore.

That was how we left it. I won't see her again for a long time. I won't really miss her or anything. We never lived together, I didn't even know she existed until she was nearly two years old. I don't take responsibility for her political views, but I probably should and I probably should try to convince her to mend her evil ways.
Nah, not worth the effort. I'll just tell her "I told you so" when the Bush scandals come out.

I can understand why my brother went Bush. His wife has inherited money he doesn't want to pay inheritance taxes or capital gains taxes on. But for the half sister, she isn't rich enough to be a republican. There isn't anything in Bush's grand scheme that will ever benefit her.

[AllegroRondo]

108. At least my brothers are all Liberals

but when the discussion of election irregularities came up, my Republican step-father said that the 8 hour long lines in minority neighborhoods were a good thing, because it kept Democrats from trying to vote twice. We all looked at him like he was an idiot and continued the conversation without him.

[natrat]

116. wow alegro you got the cool family

repukes are so mean.The hate radio has made people horrible,especially the ones who cant think for themselves. Seems like the best policy is to hold the tongue if possible. Strange being forced together with people who see the world way differently. Over time it just doesnt work. By the time my grandmother died i hated her guts. oh well

[bobbieinok]

117. both my bros are republicans (where did they go wrong)

There was only one comment "We thought you might not come because Kerry lost.' I just looked at him.

We decided years ago we would never discuss politics and manage pretty well.

One bro owns his own business and in (semi)political arguments always speaks condescendingly of the 'ivory tower' mentality and 'those of us who live in the real world and have to deal with reality every day.' (My ex and I are/were in academia.)

The other bro after FL2000 kept repeating 'Gore should concede for the good of the country just like Nixon did in 60' and would not listen/believe when I told him that scenerio was a lie.

[LittleClarkie]

118. So are they also "Christians"?

Even if they are, it doesn't sound like it "took."

[insane_cratic_gal]

119. I forced mine

to watch Fahrenheit 9/11 .. some heads rolled and opinions were changed (little too late but at least I heard asshole whispered a few times after them seeing it.)

My mom voted for Kerry.. of course
Dad: Bush
Grandmother: Bush
Cousin(s): Bush
Step Grandmother: Bush

thing is on most social issues they agreeded with me. Some where there was some major brainwashing.

Country music maybe?
even still NH went blue this year.

[Teaser]

124. Well, I don't believe in significant fraud,

But you should have asked your relatives to leave. That was disrespectful to you.

[Ladyhawk]

128. I just disowned my crazy Repub family.

There were a couple of "last straw" incidents after the election. After November 3, I was in no mood for family-as-usual. My mother stepped over the line one last time and that was IT for me. It hurts like hell and I'm lonely, but it was a toxic relationship. I was tired of dancing on the midline, if you know what I mean.

My family is crazy and fascist. Why did I bother putting up with them this long in the first place. Geez, I hope I don't wimp out and let them back into my life. :( I've got to find some friends or something.

As for your family laughing at you...I would have left right then. I wish I could have slapped them silly for you.

Stupid Republicans. :mad:

[m berst]

137. it is coming

"I've got to find some friends or something."

You aren't alone. You have us here.

We are in a transition right now, I think. Many of us are trapped between two worlds, feeling vulnerable and questioning our own sanity, and wondering where we can go, but knowing that we can't stay. We are realizing that it isn't a political philosophy we are up against, rather it is more like a disease - a wave of ugliness - people have been given the green light to be cruel and to act like bullies. This hateful plague has spread throughout the society, and has crept in very close to home for many of us. This is the same thing the Nazis did in Germany. They had no philosophy - they just gave permission and approval to people to act like thugs and bullies and to indulge their most hateful and ignorant urges.

An enlightened community will form, we won't be alone, and the support we all need will be there. Right now we are isolated and alone, but it won't be that way much longer.

[ThoughtCriminal]

129. Astonishing ignorance

My Republican-In-Laws are REALLY nice people, but simply have no grasp of reality. Millions of jobs lost? "No way". Tens of thousands of Iraqi civilians? "Never heard of such nonsense.". Homeland Security snooping Library check-outs? "Can't be true."

[Arkana]

135. No Puke relatives--I'm from MA, so they're few and far between.

But that really sucks. I like the idea of an Exlax chocolate cream pie...:evilgrin:

[Laura PourMeADrink]

139. I lost my cool when they started praising ....

"CON"deleeza Rice. How wonderful it was for black people and how proud they should be. Then I said, "From what I understand, most black people hate her. She stands for everything they are against. She also did nothing to stop an "ordinary" highjacking (her own words) on 9/11"

That shut them up for a while until they were laughing about how the democrats are blaming everything on *. Even personally killing people. And how wonderful it is that we didn't have to live through Kerry ruining the wonderful things * started.

Then I said, "It's not over yet, you know. The counting hasn't finished in Ohio." That is when they laughed hysterically mocking me and I lost it.

So you see. I lost my cool. But I dislike them all so much now. But, they are my husband's family, from a small town in Texas and I have to exist with them for a long time. Unfortunately, my democrat family is all in CT. Bad thing about marrying someone from another state. The woman usually moves to where the man lives. UGH

[formernaderite]

140. When inviting or accepting invitations...we like the old rules....

no talk about politics, religion or sex in polite company. It works beautifully and means we actually discuss "other" things and connect with family members we haven't seen a whole while.

[Trajan]

144. We have covered this here already ....

We do NOT discuss politics during holiday get-togethers anymore ...

We wont have them if we do ....

Make it a steadfast rule ....

[SpiralHawk]

145. my big brother is a total Rush NRA Repub, and a Vietnam Vet

And a great guy, too. We have always been friends as brothers, even though culturally and politically we are extreme opposites.

When we talked on Thanksgiving, he gloated only in the most mild ways when we talked about the election, because neither of us wanted to "get into it." And hey, we had the Red Sox and the Patriots to celebrate on common ground.

But when we said a few words about the election, I asked him if he truly had '"full faith and confidence" in Bush as president and commander in chief. He fell silent for a while, and then said no -- "but Bush was the lesser of two evils."

Hmmmmm?

[SiouxJ]

146. I kept waiting for my dad to ask me why I still had my

Kerry bumper sticker on my car. I saw him looking at it. We have an agreement that we won't discuss politics though, so I guess that's why he didn't say anything. It's a good agreement as I don't think we'd still be speaking if we ever got into it again. I have to admit I was kind of hoping he would ask me about the sticker, so I could tell him it is so when the country slides into the depths of hell, everyone will know who not to blame.

[greenohio]

147. Welcome to DU.

I don't mess politics with family. You have to deal with these people for the rest of your life.