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The Donkey Donating Member (358 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 03:34 PM
Original message
Conservatives Hate Us for our Sexiness!
I think I've figured out why some people hate liberals so much. It's because liberals have no problem with other people, ummmm, being fleshy with one another.

As a matter of fact - since we believe in crazy things like science, we know that the drive to engage in such behavior has a biological basis that actually leads to the creation of more liberals! Unless you look at the biological sciences as evil (and you know who you are), then you realize that there's nothing evil with the genetic makeup that we all have. As a matter of fact, if we all abstained until marriage and only "related" with one another for the sake of having kids, then our species would have gone the way of the dodo eons ago. No, being dirty sinners is the only thing that keeps concepts like Jesus and Allah alive, since such behavior existed long before the concept of marriage or religion anyway.

Even though virtually all of us has "sinned" in such a manner (and hope to "sin" again in the future, possibly after lunch or later tomorrow), only liberals admit openly to enjoying it. And boy oh boy, doesn't that cheese everyone else off! It is often said that more blood has been shed in the name of God than for any other reason. I contend that if the god(s) that heavily influence the citizens of warring nations encouraged them to get lucky on a regular basis, there'd be a lot less hate in the world. At the very least, the soldiers would likely be too tired to fight very often.

Why do conservatives contend that Hollywood is a bastion of liberalism? Because it is! I mean, look at the folks on your TV shows and movie screens. They're virtually all ridiculously hot! Of course they're liberal. You can't be that good looking and think that sex is dirty and wrong. At least not when the world is fantasizing about touching your goodies.

Why do conservatives hate gay people? Because they look better than the rest of us. Gay guys look so good that they attract guys, for crying out loud. That's pretty impressive. Maybe if a few of you homosexuals out there could at least flirt with the Rick Santorums and Jerry Falwells etc., (go ahead, take one for the team), the world would be a much happier place.

I know that just like any other behavior, that there are risks and pitfalls. And of course, people should reach a certain level of age and maturity before diving into the deep end of the pool, so to speak. Having said that, painting the actions of something that we all do is wrong and just silly. If you think that exposure of flesh is evil, then practice what you preach and keep your fleshy face off of my television.
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The Witch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 03:36 PM
Response to Original message
1. I've long had this theory
in the back of my head.

Thanks for the giggle!
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hobbit709 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 03:40 PM
Response to Original message
2. The bumper sticker from 2 Unemployed Democrats
says "Democrats Are Sexy, Who Ever Heard Of A Great Piece Of Elephant?"
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Totally Committed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 03:43 PM
Response to Original message
3. To me, there's always been nothing sexier ...
than a man with Progressive politics and a great mind.

TC
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XemaSab Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 03:59 PM
Response to Reply #3
5. Aren't those generally found together???
n/t
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Totally Committed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 06:02 PM
Response to Reply #5
13. You'd be surprised... not always.
I've dated men with great minds, but lousy politics. And I dated guys who were real dweebs, and great politics. I kinda like it when they are both present in one guy. Maybe I'm just greedy! LOL!

TC
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XemaSab Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 06:28 PM
Response to Reply #13
15. If the politics are lousy
the guy's a moran. It may not be readily apparent, but it's there, seething under the surface.
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racaulk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 03:52 PM
Response to Original message
4. That's a great theory, and I think you're right on target!
Thanks for the laugh! I needed it after this week! :rofl:

:yourock:
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blindpig Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 04:58 PM
Response to Original message
6. Yep
The same dipshits who looked on with disgust and envy at us hippie types having fun with sex&drugs&rock&roll are now running the country. Because they couldn't bring themselves to join us in liberation they turned to or intensified their materialism and religious anality. Now they are consummating their revenge.

It is the weakness of our side that we are so liberal(generically speaking) that we tolerate diverse opinion whereas they can only seek to destroy it. We however are the future, if there is to be one. Their stupid tribal monkey ways can only destroy us, along with much of the biosphere.
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LittleClarkie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 05:06 PM
Response to Original message
7. The GOP: Revenge of the Nerds
Yep, that'd do it.
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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 05:18 PM
Response to Original message
8. I've always held that the Conservative obsession with sexiness
is due to their abnormal repression of their normal sexual desires. Then they get all twisted and come out in perverted ways.

I once saw an interviw with a hooker who said that, when servicing the Republican convention, the more they quoted the Bible on T.V. the weirder the stuff they asked for was.

When asked about the Democratic convention, she said something like, "yeah, but we don't get as much business from them, they all f*#k each other."
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Mythsaje Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 06:02 PM
Response to Reply #8
14. I laughed aloud
at this one. My first thought was "well, no kidding."
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IndyOp Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 07:33 PM
Response to Reply #8
20. More support for the hooker's statement...
My straight-but-not-narrow male friend worked as a journalist in Washington DC and Indiana for a while when he was in his 30's. He worked Republican and Democratic events. He said that he was never hit on by men at Democratic events, but that men at Republican events hit on him all the time.

:kick:
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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jul-09-05 09:15 AM
Response to Reply #20
32. I know - someone had a great "stop republican pedophilia" thread
before listing all the conservatives recently arrested for molesting children. Yech.
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nashville_brook Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 08:17 PM
Response to Reply #8
22. that's my take too -- here's something i wrote recently on it
http://johnsoncity.blogspot.com/2005/06/we-arent-in-kansas-anymore-sex-and.html

We aren't in Kansas anymore: SEX and FASCISM in an UNCONSCIOUS AMERICA
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FrenchieCat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 05:40 PM
Response to Original message
9. True, true....
Being sexy does carry a price.

Being super extra sexy is even more of a burden! **sigh** :(
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adolfo Donating Member (525 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 05:40 PM
Response to Original message
10. Cmon
Edited on Fri Jul-08-05 05:46 PM by adolfo
Yes, liberals have better sex but you know what? Poor conservatives, it was probably their parents that made them what they are today. Have some compassion.
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FrenchieCat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 05:47 PM
Response to Reply #10
11. Compassion or just plain ol'
Passion?
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Mythsaje Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 06:01 PM
Response to Original message
12. Good Donkey!
This is a great argument, and probably a hell of a lot closer to the truth than they'll ever admit.
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Gyre Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 06:54 PM
Response to Original message
16. You're partially correct.
We're also better looking, more intelligent, and more courageous. How many repiglicans do you know who are major risk takers? They're just jealous and attempting to destroy that which makes them feel small and dirty. :evilgrin:

Gyre
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FrenchieCat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 07:21 PM
Response to Reply #16
18. That's what I am sayin'
Jealousy is a biotch! Poor elephants! :shrug:
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Jade Fox Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 07:13 PM
Response to Original message
17. That, and much more.
Easily 95% of musicians, artists, writers, and creative people of all stripes
are liberal to leftist. Watch, and you'll notice how often Conservatives
imitate (usually badly) something liberals have already done. There is a
huge jealousy factor in Conservative anger at Liberals.
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liberalfriend Donating Member (133 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 07:25 PM
Response to Original message
19. Here Ye Here Ye!
For all to see!

SETH BLOWS GOATASS!!!!
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Mountainman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 08:12 PM
Response to Original message
21. Much of it comes from the sixties. Remember the "cleans"
Edited on Fri Jul-08-05 08:35 PM by Mountainman
I remember back in the sixties the goody goody kids who listened to their parents and pastors who told them that sex drugs and rock and roll were the devils tools. They obeyed their authorities and missed out on the sexual revolution. Now they know that they'd been had back then and are really pissed that hippies and such had fun and nothing really bad happened like their authorities told them would happen.

I met some of these types in Los Angeles in the 80's They got divorced because they started messing around trying to make up for what they missed out on. They went to Esalen and such places like that in California. They took message lessons so they could feel up women without having to take any risk of getting bruised egos. They were always trying to hustle younger women who
didn't want anything to do with them.

The move "Sandpiper" was very much about that. Elizabeth Taylor was the older hippie chick and the straight goody goody guys wanted her.
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gulliver Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 09:14 PM
Response to Original message
23. It isn't only prudishness, but sex is probably a major factor.
Free love breaks up families. Whether there is something better for children or not is an open matter.

There is also sexual rivalry. The "intellectual elite" is a bogeyman for unintelligent men who can hope one day to be rich, but know they can never be intelligent.

Some of the Republicans, particularly freepers are latently (and manifestly too no doubt) homosexual in the worst way. The "smart ones" fashion themselves after Savage and Norquist and live for the admiration of the dumb ones -- males nearly all. The dumb ones are like intellectual "butt boys." They hang around for strokes from fellow males.

Sex has a lot to say about why bullshit rules the day.

It's like Joni Mitchell said:

And the gas leaks
And the oil spills
And sex sells everything
Sex kills ...
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McCamy Taylor Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 10:36 PM
Response to Original message
24. Is true! Also our individuality and the fact that we like ourselves!
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meow2u3 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 11:04 PM
Response to Original message
25. Conservatives are OBSESSED with sex!
They hate sex because of their own proclivities for inappropriate sexual expression. They're a childish, spiteful bunch, so because they've been told they're not allowed to enjoy sex, they try to keep everyone else from enjoying what they can't.
They're also a bunch of closet cases: closet freaks, closet gays, closet perverts, closet pedos. Some even literally screw the pooch in the closet.
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Dr Fate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 11:06 PM
Response to Reply #25
26. Conservatives are OBSESSED with sex- Liberals HAVE sex.n/t
n/t
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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jul-09-05 09:14 AM
Response to Reply #26
31. Totally agree!
And if it ain't missionary - it ain't right to them.
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The Velveteen Ocelot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-08-05 11:19 PM
Response to Original message
27. It's why they hate Bill Clinton so much.
He's proved he can get laid. They can't.
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bumblebee1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jul-09-05 02:04 PM
Response to Reply #27
33. It reminds me of a joke.
Do you know the difference between Clinton Portis and Bill Clinton? Bill Clinton knows how to score.
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RUMMYisFROSTED Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jul-09-05 12:36 AM
Response to Original message
28. They also hate us for our art.
And their near complete inability to produce it.
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dxstone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jul-09-05 01:37 AM
Response to Original message
29. Great post, Donkey! LOL!
You're a very funny writer... and it's funny cuz it's true!
It's so simple, really...

SEXY:




NOT SEXY:


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The Donkey Donating Member (358 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jul-10-05 07:03 PM
Response to Reply #29
36. Thanks for the kind words
I love your photoshop.
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ProudDad Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jul-09-05 02:15 AM
Response to Original message
30. And we're funnier too!
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nightperson Donating Member (550 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jul-09-05 04:42 PM
Response to Original message
34. Boycott the hot!
Take this obviously very successful advice and just look away



just look away :cry:

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adolfo Donating Member (525 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jul-09-05 05:40 PM
Response to Reply #34
35. ooo
:loveya:
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