Department Of Corruption, Bribery, And Incompetence

[SHRED]

President Creates Cabinet-Level Position To Coordinate Scandals

February 1, 2006 | Issue 42•05

WASHINGTON, DC—In his State of the Union address to the nation last night, President Bush announced a new cabinet-level position to coordinate all current and future scandals facing his party.
President Bush announces his plan to manage the numerous scandals of his administration.

"Tonight, by executive order, I am creating a permanent department with a vital mission: to ensure that the political scandals, underhanded dealings, and outright criminal activities of this administration are handled in a professional and orderly fashion," Bush said.

>>>> http://www.theonion.com/content/node/44892




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[NanceGreggs]

1. I hear the 'new department' is already hiring!

"The successful Applicant will be able to lie to the public and the press with a straight face.

Cash 'incentive' bonuses will be awarded for after-hours work (please do not inquire as to the source of these funds).

Ability to delete e-mails quickly an asset.

Expertise in the fast and efficient use of a paper-shredder a MUST."