Hmm. I was just on my way home from work

[Doctor_J]

and mowed down a pedestrian. Do you think Saturday morning is too soon to call the police? :shrug:

[tuvor]

1. Can we call ya "Dick"?

[Webster Green]

2. No problem......Go have another cocktail...

Anarchy is great, ain't it?

[Canuckistanian]

3. Naw, just have a friend call the local paper

That's how we do it, post-9/11.

[saltpoint]

4. I wouldn't rush into it. Kick back, maybe flip on JEOPARDY or something.

And when the urge moves you to mention it, give Britt Sig Heil Hume a call. That Britt Hume is so calm in a crisis!

And don't forget to say that the pedestrian PROVOKED you.

[tinfoilinfor2005]

5. Oh no! Did he step out in front of your car while you were busy

on the phone? Are YOU ok?? I bet you're hungry now.

[ComerPerro]

19. Or maybe you just thought he was part of the road, and you were supposed

to be driving on him.

[savemefromdumbya]

6. when I drive through a red light

when I drive through a red light I'm not breaking the law it was a matter of national security. Osama bin Ladin was chasing me officer.

[Anywho6]

7. Please run it by Karl first. Thanks. n/t

[orleans]

8. lol! (smile) n/t

[hvn_nbr_2]

9. Have a drink and dinner. Let the bartender call the local rag tomorrow.

Oh, and don't worry 'bout the pedestrian. Someone will let you know if he makes it.

[tenshi816]

10. Usually when I run down pedestrians,

I put one of my business cards in their pocket after I've written "oops, sorry" on it, with a message for someone to get in touch with me in about 18 hours - I don't want to be tied up in all that pesky red tape before I've had time to finish all my errands, fix myself a nice cocktail or three and then have a nap.

It's only fair, because those darn pedestrians inconvenience me with all that walking around they do.

[radfringe]

11. saturday is ok to do it

or just wait until monday when you have a press person with you

[FearofFutility]

12. Of course you need to wait to find out if he lives or dies

so you can report the facts accurately.

[Doctor_J]

13. An update...

my victim called to apologize for ruining my weekend by jumping in front of my car. It's good to be king.

[agincourt]

14. Be sure to have someone tell the local media,

that it was all the pedestrian's fault. He wasn't where he was supposed to be. Of course you did nothing wrong even if you had "a beer or two".

[sandnsea]

15. Is your press secretary handy?

If so, maybe he could handle it. If not, better wait for the CEO of your car make to handle the technical questions, you do have his phone number don't you?

[Jeffersons Ghost]

16. if you have the guts call the cops

If you are a coward hide behind a rich bitches skirts and ask her to call them.

[Benbow]

17. Love this thread - v funny - remember to wear a pink tie n/t

[ComerPerro]

18. That pedestrian better fucking apologize to you and your family

[Doctor_J]

21. Not a problem (see my "update" post)

the victim said, and I quote, "accidents happen" and "he's sorry for what my family and I have had to go through". Damn right.

FWIW, I was with a woman other than my wife and I was shit-faced drunk when the bastard ran in front of my car, so I was pretty distracted. He really DID make a mess of what had been a pretty good week.

[Mme. Defarge]

20. Since it was all witnessed by Katherine Armstrong

from her ranch, just have her do it for you!