One hunter’s letter to the Vice President

[ProSense]

One hunter’s letter to the Vice President

Commentary

By Pat Wray
Corvallis Gazette-Times contributor

Dick Cheney

Vice President

United States of America

Dear Mr. Vice President:

I’ve been following your unfortunate quail hunting incident in Texas and I want you to know, I don’t intend to jump all over you like so many of the liberal media. I’m also a hunter, and though I’ve never actually pulled the trigger on a hunting partner, I’ve come close enough to know how easy it can be.

Snip...

What happened to Mr. Whittington was not a peppering, Mr. Vice President. It was a shooting. Here’s a rule of thumb in case you face a similar dilemma in the future: Peppering victims curse; shooting victims fall down. Peppering victims go on hunting; shooting victims go to the ICU. Peppering victims’ hearts race; shooting victims’ hearts stop. Any questions?


Snip...

Oh, and then there’s the beer you had for lunch while you were hunting. This must be another one of those Texas hunting anomalies, so just in case you decide to hunt in other states, please allow me to offer a little advice. Hunters don’t drink during a hunting day. Period. We don’t argue about whether or not one or two beers actually diminishes our reactions or our thought processes. We just don’t drink at all until the guns are put away. “Pick up a bottle or a can, and put down your gun” is the rule followed by every hunter worthy of the title.


Snip...

I want to tell you how impressed I was, Mr. Vice President, when you agreed to an interview with Fox News and talked so honestly about the shooting. Only five days after the incident and there you were, taking personal responsibility. Are you a great role model, or what? I appreciate how tough it must have been to undergo the grilling by Fox News. Everyone knows how hard those folks are on the Administration. Brit Hume was really playing hardball with you. No wait, I’m confused. Hardball is what you play when you disclose the identity of an undercover CIA agent in an effort to punish her husband. Oops, sorry. That’s treason.

more...

http://www.gazettetimes.com/articles/2006/02/26/sports/venture/vent1.txt

[Vickers]

1. "I’ve come close enough to know how easy it can be"

:rofl:

That is an awesome article, funny and spot-on.

[ChairmanAgnostic]

2. nice letter, dude. Informative, intelligent, well written. My question is

when is the next time that Deadeye Dick goes hunting again? One week, two at most? I have this growing feeling that if he doesn't kill something every other day, he gets weird.

[efhmc]

3. What state is that in? Sent it to others.

[catabryna]

4. Oregon...

where deer season was an exceptable absence from school way back when in the late 70's/early 80's. :)

[classof56]

5. Proud to say, The Corvallis Gazette-Times is in Oregon.

I just sent Pat Wray an e-mail congratulating him on his article. Way to go, fellow Oregonian! Keep the truth out there--some day it may set us free!

Tired Old Cynic

[f-bush]

6. I love it!

[Laurab]

7. That is one excellent letter K & R n/t

[RazzleDazzle]

8. I LOVE this paragraph

What happened to Mr. Whittington was not a peppering, Mr. Vice President. It was a shooting. Here’s a rule of thumb in case you face a similar dilemma in the future: Peppering victims curse; shooting victims fall down. Peppering victims go on hunting; shooting victims go to the ICU. Peppering victims’ hearts race; shooting victims’ hearts stop. Any questions?




And it's all so TRUE. Love it.

[Joey Liberal]

9. Great! I'm passing it on! n.t

[DemReadingDU]

10. Excellent letter!

[Citrene]

11. SWEET!!! Send this everywhere and to everyone you have on any list. n/t