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Close your eyes America, everything is going just fine. Sure your gas prices are going through the roof, but just look how well the economy is doing as a result of your sacrifice. The oil companies are making record profits, and we all know that what is good for business is good for America. The fact that gas prices have doubled since George Bush took office is just a complete coincidence. I swear.
Close your eyes America, ignore the heat wave that is sweeping the nation. Ignore the droughts and the hurricanes, they couldn't have anything to do with global warming. Just because every scientist says global warming is real doesn't mean that it is. After all some politicians who got science lessons from Jerry Falwell say that the scientists who write in peer-reviewed journals are wrong. Shouldn't we listen to both sides of the issue before reaching a conclusion? Just because one side of the issue has no scientific evidence to back them up does not mean they should not get equal airtime. That is called balance. After all global warming is just a theory. It is kind of like gravity, no one can prove it is real.
Close your eyes America, ignore all the bad news coming out of Iraq. After all the liberal media covers up all the good news that is happening over there. I know this because Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, Ann Coulter, Brit Hume, Joe Scarborough, Glenn Beck, John Stossell, Wolf Blitzer, George Will, Oliver North, Tucker Carlson and Chris Matthews all admitted it and they are all part of the liberal media. So just ignore those images of children with their limbs blown off that you have seen in the foreign press because those pictures are biased. If not even our liberal media will show them then they must not be of any importance.
Close your eyes America, ignore the fact that the NSA now has a program to monitor the phone calls of every single American. After all these people said they were for small government, and no one who says they are for small government would actually use such a big government program, right? George Orwell had no clue what he was talking about, so just ignore everything he ever wrote.
Close you eyes America, just because your family member is not able to get health insurance does not mean they might need it someday. Those CEOs of the pharmaceutical industry the HMOs and the insurance industry need their billion dollar salaries or they won't innovate new solutions to find ways for you to get the care you need. So just be patient and let the market work its magic, that way we don't have to worry about your health care needs.
Close your eyes America, if you can't see anything wrong then nothing must be wrong. So just don't worry your little heads George Bush will protect you. If you disagree however then you have the right to go out and vote for change, just ignore the Diebold machine you are voting on. We promise we will count your vote properly. Just have faith, we wouldn't lie. After all didn't you hear the liberal media talk about our plan to spread democracy around the world. If the liberal media says it is true and we agree then it must be true. They are only biased if they say something we don't like because then they aren't presenting both sides.
So close your eyes America, we will let you know the reality of what is happening in this world. Honest.
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