Fun ways to protect Political Signs

[ThoughtCriminal]

It's that season again! Do local Freepers like to steal your yard signs? Let's hear some creative ideas!

Here area couple I've heard from previous elections:

1 - Low cost burglar alarms attached to the sign stake. Small and cheap alarms designed as cheap window alarms. Can usually be purchased in packages of 2-4 at discount stores. Small enough to no un-noticed especially at night. The possible urine stain on the lawn will be worth it even if you don't recover the sign or the alarm.

2 - Fishing line attached to stake and nearby tree. Give it enough slack so they're running full speed when it runs out.

3 - Motion sensing floodlights concealed nearby are also good if they are set up so that they do not trip for casual traffic. If you're really creative, it can trigger a sound recording rather than turn on a light (growling hound-of hell is good).

Be sure to share the video with You-Tube.

[silverweb]

1. LOL

I love them all! Such visual imagery! :D

[Warpy]

2. Capsaicin is also a great idea

whether from habanero chiles buzzed in a blender or bottled hot sauce. Coat the back of the sign.

That first touch to a mucus membrane (hopefully the pink parts when he takes a leak) will remind him that crime does not pay.

[unhappycamper]

3. Use nothing but the best:

You are a genius!

[Pacifist Patriot]

18. I coated my Kerry/Edwards sign with Vaseline mixed with cap...

Two days later I saw finger streaks through the vaseline. Sadly I'll never know what the effects of the cap were. The sign stayed up until Election Day after I did that though. I'd had four previous signs stolen.

[Contrary1]

4. And the ever popular

doggie poop, sans the little Bush poo flag, of course. Borrow it from friends if you have to.
Sprinkle liberally within a 5 foot radius of your sign, not so close that they can just lean over it.

After dark, it won't matter as much. Hopefully the perpetrator has his car with him, so he
can deposit the delightful scent all over the floorboard.

And if the circus is in town, go and get a few buckets of elephant dung, and use it instead...
just for the irony.

[rzemanfl]

5. Does anyone make fake plastic razor wire? That would be a

significant deterrent, especially at night.

[Jeff In Milwaukee]

6. I know people who use concrete...

They live on a major thoroughfare, so their yard is a prime location. They're good Democrats, so they always allow a few signs in their yard. The guy makes little fist-sized balls of cement (the quick dry stuff) and embeds the sign in them. Then buries them in the yard. It makes for a couple of bald spots in the yard during the off-season, but they're pretty small. And nobody has made off with a sign since he started doing that -- although that doesn't stop the vandalism.

[havocmom]

7. Unit for a hot wire fence is 5"x 7"x2", not expensive and VERY adaptable

You can hang it just about anywhere out of sight and then run an outdoor extension cord to the box. Run the wires from the box to wires on your signs through lengths of old garden hose and you have a safe, fun way to meet your more obnoxious neighbors as they yeowl and dance on your lawn. No body hurt but plenty busted.

Try it. You'll like it! :evilgrin:

[rosesaylavee]

8. Oooo! Great Idea!

Shocking!!

[havocmom]

10. Yep, why go for noisy alarms? Let the vandals BE the alarm

that alerts you to trouble. Not unlikely they will piss their pants as an added bonus. MUCH more fun than just the thought of them tracking stinky poop into their cars :D

[rosesaylavee]

14. Was reading the OP to my husband

earlier and he suggested hot-wiring... then I read your post and told him 'the how of it' was already worked out.

We have this trouble every election since 2000. I report it to the police every time as I want it in the paper that this vandalism occurs. The police may not approve of our electrifying our property however!

[MockSwede]

9. Sound choice

I prefer the tripwire triggered audio clip. Shotgun blast. Incoming mortar round.

[havocmom]

11. People, let's get some more Recommendations for this one!

You KNOW this is gonna be a HUGH!!!11!1!! problem for many this fall ;)

Lets offer up suggestions for what people can do about the problem of
morans who hate us for our free speech.

[blondeatlast]

12. Love the fishing line idea, very subtle.

Just make sure it's heavy test.

Trying to sell my house so yard signs are most definitely out for now.

This promises to be a very funny thread.

:kick: & R!

[NMDemDist2]

17. ohno BaL! why are you selling your house?

and why didn't you do it a year ago? I barely made it out of town with the market slowing down so bad there

I'll send a little prayer to St WhoeverthePropertySaintis for you to sell quickly

[blondeatlast]

23. We may be moving to Austin, TX, for one, though I'm hoping not to.

Basically we've grown out of the house and we want a pool.

Another reason I'll PM you about too.

[blondeatlast]

32. ...

:kick:

[deadparrot]

13. Rub poison ivy alllll over them...nt

[chat_noir]

15. poison ivy still in season?

I remember the poison ivy discussions in 2004.


Tanglefoot - on the sign and around it

[Clark2008]

31. It is in the South.

We don't have the first frost until, generally, after the elections. And, even if we do have a minor frost in October, it's not enough to kill poison ivy.

[cascadiance]

16. Perhaps I should have my motion sensor remind people to "curb their dogs".

I just put up my Francine Busby sign outside of my house a week ago, and since that time coincidentally I noticed an "unscooped" pile of crap about a couple of feet away from the sign. Right before the June Primary I had one sign torn up and thrown in front of my door. Perhaps I need a camera so that I can "literally" get pissed off at whoever's f'ing with it. Already had a car stolen in front of my house a couple of years ago too.

[Auntie Bush]

28. Move to VT. We can leave the car keys in the car.

But we do get political signs stolen. Somehow politics brings out the worst in people. :evilgrin:

[Pacifist Patriot]

19. Where I am it's not too hard to find fire ant nests to host your sign.

[maseman]

20. Man...fire ants are nasty

I have a not so mean but mean sounding 35 lb. dog. He's ordinarily inside at night but during election season I let him sleep outside. I'll hear the occasional growl and chase and of course the yelp that follows. Haven't had a sign missing in two years.

[DesertRat]

21. I had my eye on a neighbors republican senator sign

But after reading this messages, I think I'll leave it alone.... :hide:

[alittlelark]

22. TANGLEFOOT !!!! It's like pine sap.

I use it on trees and shrubs that have a tendency to attract ants - just make a ring of it around the base of the trunk.

For political signs - place a thin strip along the sides of the sign, and some at the base.

The freeper that tries to steal it will end up coated in sticky goo that will get all over hands (acetone needed to remove it), his clothes (stains, and is almost impossible to wash off), and his beater car (could improve it actually).

You can get Tanglefoot at almost any garden supply store.

[Auntie Bush]

29. Now that's what I call a good sensible idea. Thanks!

I wonder if one could use that to entrap those nasty tent caterpillars that crawl down the trees in the spring? Hmmmmm.

[Bucky]

24. I suggest going to local army surplus store and planting land mines

Another fave: hire ninjas to sleep in your trees right above your yard sign. When Freepers show up, they can slice and dice for democracy.

[Slyder]

25. You guys have all the fun

This year I will not have any political signs in my yard. All offices up are either Democratic shoo-ins (yes, I know this is Kansas) or non-partisan elections where ALL the candidates are actually Republicans. And residing in the 3rd Congressional District of Kansas my congressman voted for the Military Commissions Act and he will not have a sign in my yard this year. I do not support candidates from any party that favor legalization of torture. I intend to abstain from that part of my ballot, as I cannot support any Republican for any office. But I will save your suggestions as I have also had a problem with stolen signs.

(hehehe and I know I am an example of the "banality of evil" but I cannot help myself. Irony is dripping!) I am of the opinion that persons stealing political signs from a person's yard should be drawn and quartered publicly and in all its gory splendor with body parts on spikes for months outside stadiums, courthouses, and shopping centers! Now that torture is legal let's do it right!

[morningglory]

26. My Dem brother lived in the most Repuke precinct in the state of Louisiana

before Katrina destroyed his house. People always removed his signs, so he noticed a 5' diameter fire ant bed by a tree. He got the sign prepped, hammer in hand, nail, boots. Ran tippy-toe up to the tree through the fire ant bed. Whack with the nail, and ran out, removed boots before ants could attack. Then he had a great deal of fun the rest of the season noticing the disturbed footprints in the antbed.

[Dragonbreathp9d]

27. Electrified Wire

[eridani]

30. So, has anyone ever done anything to Repub signs?

I'm not a big believer in tearing them up, but why not a little inventive alteration? About 15 miles out of Seattle I saw a Mike McGavick for US Senator sign that had LOBBYIST put over the SENATOR part, in a somewhat similar typeface and color scheme. Wish I had gotten a picture, but I was driving alone at the time, and I think it's too unsafe to drive and try to take a cell-phone picture at the same time. I thought of it just now because PEDOPHILE might be a good option for some signs--it would fit fine in same-sized letters over REPRESENTATIVE, though a little too long for SENATOR. Not that anybody should actually do this, because that would be wrong.

The Truth in Advertising folks used to go to great lengths to get lettering and colors right in their billboard alterations.