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Edited on Mon Oct-16-06 10:41 PM by NanceGreggs
GOP-TV – Best Soap Opera EVER!
By Nancy Greggs
Just to get anyone who has missed the last few episodes up to speed, here’s the story so far:
When we last saw our friends, the Republicans, they had painted themselves into a corner, and that tacky stuff on the floor is their own rhetoric, carefully mixed, shaken AND stirred over the years they have been in control.
The Foley scandal has the (R)s scurrying for a one-size-fits-all story, but there isn’t one to be had. The “don’t turn a sex scandal into something political” idea had to be abandoned early on, lest the story of the Ghost-of-Presidents-Past be told yet again – which led to the “we didn’t want to be seen as anti-gay” excuse for not pursuing Foley at the outset – a bit of a stretch coming from the same people who have repeatedly warned the populace of the dangers of allowing the ‘gay agenda’ to infiltrate our culture and our government.
So it was back to square one. Now the Fundies, already pissed-off over the fact that they never got that anti-gay marriage Amendment they’d been promised – along with all of the other things Bu$hCo never delivered on – are looking at any excuse-making for Foley’s behavior as just another sign of possible betrayal by their born-again messiah-cum-president. Add to the mix the release of “Tempting Faith” and its attendant publicity; it’s a enough to make a lot of those RW Christians go, “Hmmm.”
Amidst the Foley fiasco, Ney pleads guilty, Noe goes on trial, and Maccacowitz has some ‘splaining to do vis-à-vis his financial disclosures, not to mention a newly-surfaced arrest record from back in the day. Weldon’s daughter and best friend get a not-so-friendly impromptu visit from the FBI. Frist, still under investigation by the SEC, announces his great new plan to make nice with the Taliban – who you might remember from the short-lived “We Have Totally Destroyed Them” series of a few short years ago – and prays that Santorum will make a public statement sometime soon just to get him off the hook as being the dumbest kid on the GOP block.
James Baker III hits the late-night talk-show circuit to peddle his new book, and makes a heart-felt plea for a spirit of bi-partisanship – hoping against hope that no one remembers his contribution to putting the most divisive president in history in the White House – and also hoping that no one remembers he doesn’t have a heart to make any pleas with in the first place.
The Republican shills (aka pundits/journalists/strategerists) also make the TV show rounds, reminding everyone who will listen (an ever-decreasing audience) that the upcoming mid-terms are not about Bush and his policies, but about individual Republicans who should be assessed on their own merits by the voters – which would have been a great strategy, were it not for the fact that these same rustic individuals have never missed an opportunity to point to their lock-step solidarity as a point of pride.
And what of those jaunty individuals who are now trying to distance themselves from their beloved master in the eleventh hour? They don’t seem able to make a public appearance without scratching themselves, being covered in fleas from the dog they chose to lie down with until those plummeting approval numbers sent them scurrying for less-infested sleeping quarters.
The mis-steps of the GOP have even filtered down to their propaganda network, FAUX News, who have identified two Republicans as Democrats (i.e. the guys who are ahead in their respective races), thereby ensuring that their couch-potato (or potatoe-R) viewers will either stay home on election day because their Republican candidates are already a sure thing, or rush out to vote for Ford in Tennessee or Whitehouse in Rhode Island to ensure those good ol’ GOP boys win by a landslide!
So as we end tonight’s episode, the Fundie base is losing faith, GOP candidates can’t get arrested (unless you count REALLY being arrested, handcuffs and all), the “It’s All Clinton’s Fault” theme song has lost its luster, six hundred thousand deaths in Iraq can’t be explained away as fuzzy math, North Korea has gone nukular, el presidente’s poll numbers have dropped lower than his IQ (an almost impossible achievement), and in a matter of just a few weeks, voters will go to the polls to decide if the corruption-ridden, lying elected officials who have outsourced their jobs, destroyed the economy, plunged them into debt, short-changed their children’s education, polluted the environment, supported the quagmire in Iraq, and handed their tax dollars over to wealthy individuals, corporations and war profiteers deserve another kick at the can.
Tune in for the season ender on November 7th. It’s not going to be much of a nail-biter, but the happy ending will more than make up for the lack of surprise.
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