"Please Help Me I'm Falling" Wondering if any on DUers are...

[LakeSamish706]

having similar problems to mine? I have been married for 36 years, and have good friends of 30 years or more, but I will damned if I can wake either my wife up or my friends to what is going on in our dangerous world. It really does get lonely out here, and if it weren't for sites like DU I really don't know how I would begin to cope. At least once a day I find myself breaking down at the thought of where we are headed in this world. It is so depressing with people that you love and can not communicate the dangers that we face.

Thank you DU for being here!

[DaveJ]

1. Only been married 5 years

My wife already doesn't listen to anything I say. Was yours actually listening to you up until now?

[LakeSamish706]

3. Nope, she has never listened to anything regarding politics....

It's like she sticks her head in the sand and plugs her ears, the same with my friends... I call them all Repubs and am forced to go on my mary way.

[DaveJ]

14. Yeah I 've call her a Repub jokingly

I can repeat the same thing to her 4 times in a row and she will still have no idea what I said. Even though she doesn't care about politics she can see the images of Bush on TV and thinks he's an ass, and she feels for the suffering of the troops, and she really likes the idea of another woman becoming President (sorry anti Hillary people).

As far as your frustration goes, I guess I've been on the DU long enough to not remember what that feels like.

Are people really becoming that jaded to everything now?

I am frustrated and have no friends, I thought because nobody really shared the same kind of goals I have (want to build a business based on an electronic product I create). I guess friends are not expected to share any interests.

[againes654]

2. Right there with you

I can't seem to make anyone around me see how dangerous this situation is getting. It is so frustrating.

[LakeSamish706]

4. I don't know if you get that lonely sinking feeling, but I sure know that...

I do.... It really becomes a form of depression not being able to communicate with the people that are near and dear to you....

[pwb]

5. is she a fox news viewer or limpballs listener?

if so give it up those people are lost forever.

[LakeSamish706]

7. Nope, she just lives in a world where there are no bad things...

Damn I am envious in many ways, but I have never been like that. I have been involved in current events since I can remember, and not sure I could be otherwise.

[lazyriver]

26. My wife lives in that world too and I think I understand

how you might feel. Not being able to open the eyes of the one closest to you can really be bad for the ol' morale. If I can't get her to wake up, what are the chances of succeeding with politicians or perfect strangers?

[LakeSamish706]

6. One huge question is, Why do some of us get it, while others don't? n/t

[Armstead]

9. It's not that simple

A lot of people tune out because they don't think politics makes any difference. With the lame choices they're often given, and the shallow "politics as sport" coverage of the MSM, it's not surprising that many people become fatalistic and apathetic.

I periodically get that feeling and tune out myself. After all, no matter how much you might care about -- say -- the war in Iraq, it becomes an exercise in futlilty to hear the same =damn debate going on now that was going on three years ago.

[LakeSamish706]

11. Yep, you certainly make good points. n/t

[bdamomma]

12. we "get it" cause we educate ourselves with what's really

happening in our country be it through DU or other alternative places of information. Sad that there are some who are not so well informed as us, it is our job to educate or try to educate them to what is happening out there. just my two cents.

[nashville_brook]

22. not everyone "lives" in the world of ideas -- political and otherwise

this is why "liberal arts" core education is encouraged for people going into professions like medicine and engineering. we aren't born as engaged individuals -- it's a learned activity. it's recognized that we need people to be informed and engaged or else our "participatory" democracy will crumble.

a better (less elitist) example might be how "civics" used to be taught in secondary school, but is rarely seen anymore. you almost *have* to go to college to learn/care about the "polity" and "civitas."

we're taught to be consumers -- not participants.

[fasttense]

8. Hmm, my husband use to be a republican

until bush got picked for president by the dancing supremes. He couldn't believe the black robed junta wouldn't allow for counting all the votes. As if our votes meant nothing. He's a Southern Baptist and is very religious. But he's now more liberal than I am.

[LakeSamish706]

10. I will bet you that a few of the Judges wish that they had voted differently now. n/t

[Sequoia]

13. At first I thought you were referring to an old country tune

my dad used to listen to on a 45 record. I miss those old 45s he had.

[LakeSamish706]

16. Truth is I had that in mind when I posted the original..... I loved that song...

even though it is sad, but it certainly represents the way this country is now as well... "SAD"

[Sequoia]

23. Well then,

Please help me I'm falling
In love with you
Close the door to temptation
Don't let me walk through
Turn away from me darlin'
I'm beggin' you to
Please help me I'm falling
In love with you

I belong to another
Whose arms have grown cold
But I promised forever
To have and to hold
So I can never be free
But when I'm with you
I know that I'm losing
The will to be true

Please help me I'm falling
And that would be a sin
Close the door to temptation
Don't let me walk in
Lord, I musn't want you
But darlin' I do
Please help me I'm falling
In love with you

Please help me I'm falling
In love with you

[Festivito]

15. Remember to enjoy life's ride.

We are all just lucky to be here at all. Lucky to have been here at all.

Take some time, remember there are roses to smell, things to enjoy; and you might find that your friends will connect with you more readily.

And as we don't accept anything without a link around here, they need to question your sources as well, which is too much for casual conversation. The rule is: if a woman claims to be your mother... check it out!

For some, like myself, the falls make the best part of life's rollercoaster ride. Enjoy the ride. Life is a great time.

[LakeSamish706]

17. Wonderful words, and thanks... n/t

[jojo54]

18. You can alwasys come here for some sanity, 706.

Been married for 32 years to a Democrat, so I'm lucky there. Guess we both saw the light (or maybe it was the repug corruption) at an early age.

And welcome to DU!!

[LakeSamish706]

20. Thanks Jojo... Yes you are lucky for sure.. Funny thing about the...

rest of my story that I didn't post is that my 30 year friends daughter (44 years of age) gets it, and I just found that out a few weeks ago. We were all together and she started talking about a book she was reading called "It's the Crude, Dude" by a Canadian Author.. Linda McQuaig (Pretty good read I might add). As the conversation progressed, I realized that she really was in the loop.. Was an interesting discovery for me.

[nashville_brook]

19. please tell more about the resistance you get...

i sympathize -- not b/c i'm in that situation, but b/c i know i'd go batshit crazy to be surrounded by people who aren't grokking our current situation.

i haven't built my social life around my political beliefs. but i don't have any significant people in my life who identify as "republican." some friends say they've voted for the creatures in the past, but they don't "identify" as repubs.

i find that people leaning too far to the right (or worse, unconcerned) have other personality traits that preclude long-lasting relationships e.g. too rigid -- not able to handle ambiguity, too authoritarian, etc. we'd be just as likely to clash on cultural/artistic stuff, as we would political issues.

[LakeSamish706]

21. I do know that the wife (our friends) suffers more from fear of what...

I say than total disbeliefe... If I even dared to send something that suggested a possible hit on Iran by the US and what I saw as the consequences, her head would go right into the sand and she would write me back and ask that I not send stuff like that....
The troubling part of all of this is that having lived thru the Vietnam era, you would think that we would be conditioned for what is going on (Thats not to say we should tolerate it) but at least be conditioned.

[nashville_brook]

25. that helps a LOT --

often fear is the result of feeling disempowered. sure she wants to stick her head in the sand. i would too if i didn't have this crazy idea that my voice matters -- that it's important that we at least bear witness to the destruction that's happening.

you know -- i think popular culture MUST reclaim the head-on tactics of the Vietnam-era anti-war movement. i think people really need to see other people engaged and empowered in order to own their potential for changing things. the only activity we participate in (it seems) is buying shit. we need to break free and reclaim our right and responsibility to BUILD things and change things.

dealing with fear is easier than dealing with ideology. you need to find empowering messages for this person. she needs to witness an alternative to fear.

[Hekate]

24. When things fall apart...

I suspect you will get a lot of responses to this, LakeSamish. Welcome to DU. :hi: You have a lot of company here.

Everyone's ability to cope is different. One night there was a whole thread on the upsurge in anti-depressant use since the 2000 presidential selection. It's a serious consideration. If someone is too distraught over the sheer volume of what they cannot accomplish or communicate, then they cease to be effective and relationships suffer.

Other midnight threads detail the ruptures in relationships -- with neighbors, relatives, parents -- brought about by the intensity of anger and anxiety that so many of us feel about the state of our nation and our world.

All that I can advise, based on both experience and observation, is to first and foremost try to preserve the valued relationships you already have. George Bush and his gang of criminals will leave office someday, but your friends and relations, gods willing, will still be in your life. In your own mind simply declare some topics off limits, if that's what it takes.

Find another outlet for your passion, and join a local activist group of environmentalists or Democrats. Post here often. Believe me, we understand.

Talk-therapy can also help.

Try some meditation -- seriously. There are books and CDs at the library and the bookstore. A calmer frame of mind will not disarm you, but fortify you for the battle.

I recommend reading almost anything by Thich Nhat Hanh, an exiled Vietnamese Buddhist monk. He has lived through war, but carries a message of inner peace. Joanna Macy is an American Buddhist and environmental activist; she and her husband Fran used to work for the US State Department, but for decades have been working against nuclear power and for the environment. Pema Chodron is another American Buddhist. The title of one of her books says it all: "When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times."

Be well, :hug:

Hekate