It's time to admit we Dean Supporters were backing Bush all along

[edzontar]

As I look around here, it is becoming increasingly clear that our dirty little secret is out.

So now you know.

The Dean campaign WAS in fact nothing more than an elaborate plot to win a second term for Pres. George W. Bush.

Our plan, form the start, was to get this unelectable, angry man (Dean)--a self-evidently "false" liberal and corporate shill as so many of you recognized-- to win the nomination and defeat the more "electable" candidates, which we recognized, from the sart, to be Kerry and Edwards.

Our allies in this plot were the Media and the Big Corporations, who conspired to proclaim Dean the "front-runner" before a single vote was cast and marginalized the "real" and more dangerously charismatic candidates, Kerry and Edwards.

Everything seemed to be going according to plan until Iowa, when a brave band of retired veterans and a blue collar army of rank-and-file, just-plain folks Democrats destroyed our hopes to win the "easy way" by recognizing the flaws of our angry, boisterus candidate some three months earlier than they were SUPPOSED to.

The Dean supporters and Dean himself received new orders. Undermine the campaign with a widely televised rebel yell. Then, during the inevitabe decline, stay in the race to cause trouble and foment division. Anything to keep the primaries going and delay the nomination of Kerry.

But as the Kerry bandwagon swept across America, inspiring Democrats like never before with its promise of a "Real Deal," we knew we had to take drastic action.

And so it was time for plan B.

Reactivate the Nader campaign.

The former supporters of Dean received their new orders--continue to claim support for Dean or the Dems, but secretly work to antagonize and divide the base by posting anti-ABB messages on the Democratic Messege Boards.

Our new mantra of deception: "Let us vote, the primaries are not over yet."

Then--just as we planned--the Nader card was activated--and the resulting panic and acrimony has so far exceeded even our own highest expectations.

So why, if everything is proceeding so well, Have we chosen this time to reveal our plan to you here at DU?

Because we don't care!!!!

It is too late my friends--no one will believe you!!!

The die is cast, and there is NOTHING you can do to stop us.


BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

[patricia92243]

1. I assume this post is sarcastic?

[edzontar]

31. What gave you that idea?

nt

[Scott Lee]

33. Man, there are some quick minds here at DU

I stand all amazed.

[JackRiddler]

50. watch it...

If our children learns to read, you'll get called to the Principal.

[GodHelpUsAll2]

59. Well

It was quite a good read. It cracked me the hell up.

[JackRiddler]

45. Oh, he is dead serious.

We Nadeans and Deanaders revel in exposing our master plans, leaving you all the more helpless.

[lurk_no_more]

51. You assume too much

And then there were none!
” JAFO”

[MuseRider]

2. Ohhhh

so that is the deal. Thank goodness, I thought it was the Kucinich supporters. Darn fine time to be a progressive around here isn't it?

[MikeG]

3. Does this mean that Nader will melt down too?

[edzontar]

6. I have revealed all that I can.

We shall see if our little plan is successful.

Unfortunately, the random factor is the "voters."

Unfortunately, we have not yet reached the point where the public will accept the final revocation of that outdated "right."

Therefore, we have to go incredibly elaborate lengths--remember Florida?--to get the result we want.

Maybe some day this fiction will not longer be required.

[liberalnurse]

22. You promised not to tell......

You gave the "blood oath" too.

I'm shocked!

[edzontar]

27. Don't worry. No one will believe it.

They will think it is "satire."

The fools!!!!

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

4. That's not true and I have never thought that of progressives

but there is enough childish behavior to go around today and I think this thread qualifies.

[liberalnurse]

20. Any one need prunes?

I got extra punes for anyone who desires them and just may need them .....

They had extra's at the nursing home down the street. I'll go get ya some ....

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

26. Anyone need the ability to reason in a deductive fashion?

nevermind I don't have all year.

[edzontar]

29. Please-lighten up my friend.

It is the weekend.

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

40. oh alright, here

but it's your turn to roll

[Nimble_Idea]

5. That's kinda funny

lol, had me laughing, I hope people actually read this and not just the first line and GO SHRUB BALISTIC AND INVADE A NATION

I was about to blast you apart , but i kept reading and realized you have to be joking, or at the least, I would ignore you.

[edzontar]

8. Yes, there is a certain element of *satire* in my post.

But even that will not save you in the end.

[buddhamama]

7. yeah, you guys knew you never stood a chance against Bush

and Dean being in the race just made it harder on the "real" candidates, the actually had to spend like time and money on communicating with the electorate. the frickin' nerve of you people :eyes: and now this Nader thing, you guys suck! *





*note-for the sarcasm impaired. the sentiments expressed in this post are not to be taken seriously*

[Scott Lee]

9. My brother, have you forgotten our oath of secrecy?

Or must we paddle your bum with board at the next Stonecutter's Temple rite?

[edzontar]

14. I shall lift my skirt to receive my beating....

I have been a BAD GIRL!!!!!

[Forkboy]

10. I knew it!

:D

[Zomby Woof]

11. I don't know of anyone on here who thinks that

I have never doubted the progressive creds of Dean supporters, I have never subscribed to the myth that they were born on the internet, nor have I ever felt they had a secret agenda of any kind.

I only question their wisdom and judgment, but that is not the same as questioning loyalty, intelligence, or sincerity.

[poskonig]

12. I do not support SpaceShrub.

I'm insulted by the suggestion. I now support Kerry, and have nothing but contempt for Mr. Nader.

[edzontar]

15. *SATIRE" alert.

nt

[wryter2000]

13. You caught me

Ever since I saw him in his flight suit...be still, my heart.

[CityDem]

16. I am not for bush -- nor am I for the DLC tool

Love your sarcasm. While I will not vote for bush under any circumstances, I will not vote for a tool of big, corporate interests either. Therefore, I will not vote for any DLCer like Kerry.

[Indiana Democrat]

17. I don't believe you supported Bush...

...but I am convinced that if Dean would have won the nomination, Bush would have won in a WALK.

[Capn Sunshine]

34. Substitute "Kerry" for" Dean"

and you'll know the meaning of "prescience"

[MidwestMomma]

18. Nothing we can do to stop you?

I think you forgot the power of the ham sandwich...victory is within our grasp! }(

[Faygo Kid]

19. I knew it! Now stop sending me signals through the TV

And tell the black helicopters to quit circling my apartment! Thank you. What? Dill pickle.

[revcarol]

25. Potato chips with that bologna sandwich.

Ham sandwich, hell.

HELP!!Invisible Dean bugs are coming out of my faucet to get me!! It's a Dean plot to take my virginity!!

[jansu]

21. YEEAAAAAAAAGH!

Finally, something to laugh about! Thanks!

[Padraig18]

23. As Tony says, "The floggings shall continue until morale improves!"

[mzmolly]

24. Tsk, Tsk... Baaaad Deanie.

:spank:

[mitchum]

28. That really doesn't work as satire...

because I don't recall anyone claiming that Dean supporters were working for *'s reelection.

[edzontar]

30. Perhaps your memory is short. Or you missed those threads.

If so, lucky you.

[Capn Sunshine]

35. Kerry has always been the nominee!

we have ALWAYS been at war with Oceania!

[mitchum]

43. No, my memory is long...

(but then again my skin is also thick)

[Capn Sunshine]

32. Damn it Ed!!

I told you , I'm SORRY the check bounced. It will never happen again! We just forgot the deposit , I swear.

Now delete this post before you give away the part about all of our fallout shelters being active and connected, and the state of Oregon being expendable to serve the larger purpose-- and thank god no one believes these lunatics here at DU.
:nuke::nuke::nuke::

[AntiCoup2K4]

48. Now wait a damn minute! I never agreed to nuking Oregon!

Well, not Portland, Eugene. or the coast that is. The rest of the state pretty much sucks though. Except the Deschutes Brewery in Bend. Gotta save that. The rest of the state - fuck em!

Re "elect" the BCE!!!

[Exgeneral]

61. I'm pretty sure the rest of the state was alredy nuked

sure looks that way-------or are they shooting a Kevin Costner movie there again?

[Walt Starr]

36. You know what this means, don't you?

You head must be chopped off, your hands removed, your legs sliced down the middle and your bowels spilled upon the earth.

That is, if you took the same oath I did!

[eileen_d]

37. Refreshing post - Thanks for your honesty.

The funny thing is, if Dean were the Democratic Party nominee, he and his supporters would have been instrumental in giving Bush a second term.

Now that the voters have spoken, and Dean is out of the race, I will fear no Nader.

[MidwestMomma]

38. But if Dean was the nominee, wouldn't we all be supporting him?

According to the dictates of ABB we would. So how would Dean have given Bush a second term? I don't understand your logic.

[slinkerwink]

47. same here either.....

any of our Dem candidates could've beaten Bush--hell, even a fly could beat Bush.

[Guaranteed]

39. SHHHHH!!

Ixnay on the Adernay!!

[Nazgul35]

41. Damn you edzontar!!!!!

You have let our secret out!!!!

At this very minute members of the elite Dean Strike Force are moving in on your position!!!

This level of treason will not be tolerated.....you must die!!!!

Now we will have to go with Plan C.......

[Walt Starr]

52. DAMNIT

I was hoping we weren't going to have to pull Bonesman rank in this shit and put the Bildebergers on the case.

SHIT!

No we are going to owe the Trilateral Commission BIG FUCKING TIME!

[revcarol]

42. Damn you. That's TWICE today I have spewed coffee all over my computer.

There ought to be a charge for satire posts to cover my costs.

[KeepHopeAlive]

44. Humor is the best medicine

Thanks for the smile. :)

[RUMMYisFROSTED]

46. Plan C:

[Meldread]

49. They know too much now.

Now we have to kill them all. They know to much!

[candy331]

53. Anticipation , anticipation

Anticipaaaaaaaaation is making me wait.

[philosophie_en_rose]

54. Somehow, my sarcasm powers are failing me.

The tone and the content are an insult to the thousands of people that supported Howard Dean.



:mad:

[LittleDannySlowhorse]

55. Not to me

I thought it was funny as shit.

[GodHelpUsAll2]

60. Me too

[edzontar]

58. I supported and still support Howard Dean.

My "targets" were elsewhere----read again.

[dawn]

56. edit: I didn't know you were being sarcastic.

[LosinIt]

57. Ed, What the Hell??

You know when we took the blood oath that we weren't supposed to tell? No you are out of the club. There's no way around it. Once the all powerful DLC/DNC get wind of this we won't be able to use this ploy ever again. We thought that you could be trusted. Send back your shirt.