Come to think of it, one of the things I like most about Obama is his healthy ego.

[EFerrari]

When someone points out a mistake he's made, he can handle it. If he doesn't win something, he doesn't seem to beat himself up, he just focuses a little more, and keeps moving. If someone says he lacks X, he doesn't seem very defensive. He really doesn't seem to have a very high maintenance ego. It seems resilient and mostly balanced. Big enough to handle big projects but not out of control and / or in his way or, constantly burdening other people. He makes fun of himself a whole lot more than he pokes fun at others.

I really like that about him. What a change from the Torture President who is always asking us to understand him and to agree with him and to put up with his defensive bullshit, his miserable attempts at humor, and to pretend that we approve of his horrible "leadership".







/oops

[Eurobabe]

1. One of the reasons I have come to like him alot

You nailed it.

Compare that to Hillary's laughter, Bill's histrionics when something asks them that could be very easily neutralized with a bit of humble pie.

[patrice]

11. Humble pie can be quite nourishing AND it can be an opportunity to say things

that need to be said about all of us, including one's opposition.

[joeybee12]

2. Sorry, but every President and every person running for Prez has a huge

ego...it may come across differently, but it's gotta be huge to think you can do that job. As for Bush, his ego is probably bigger than most since he seems miffed and defensive when someone doesn't think he's God.

[EFerrari]

4. So, are you saying size matters?

I'm saying, health and balance matter.

lol

[joeybee12]

40. Yup, size matters...

...if someone tries to tell you it doesn't, well, then perhaps they have a secret they don't wnat you to find out about.

[EFerrari]

42. Size may matter if you're talking about a penis.

When you're talking about ego, it doesn't matter in the least. In fact, what people usually call "a huge ego" means, an ego that requires constant servicing from others. Obama doesn't seem to have one of those. He has the ability to just let things go, even when they go against him, so he can pay attention to his larger project. Most people are much less able, much more "petty", have a much harder time doing that.

[patrice]

13. Definition of ego, please and thank you. nt

[caledesi]

20. HEALTHLY not huge......e.g. G W Bush..NT

[tinrobot]

23. Self-confidence and ego are not the same thing.

Self-confidence comes from faith in one's abilities. It also gives one the ability to accept whatever happens with calm and grace.

Ego is more of a self-centered thing. It's all about the person, and when things go wrong, the person gets upset and emotional.

There are a lot of great leaders who have a lot of self-confidence but not much ego.

[EFerrari]

35. Your ego is how you know who you are.

If you have trouble with that, how you know everyone and everything else can be a problem. It would be good to have a leader who doesn't have any trouble relating to himself or to other people.

[joeybee12]

41. I disagree...they all have ego...many have self-confidence as well...

...but ego is a given, and I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing, just a reality.

[EFerrari]

48. Everyone who has any self awareness at all has ego.

In order to not have an ego, you'd have to be brain dead.

But the point is, that ego can get in your way and make people around you miserable, or, it can a help keep you on track and easy to work with.

All I'm saying about Obama is, his doesn't seem to be one of those egos that makes everyone around you wish they were dead, or one of those that makes you make really bad decision to placate your own out of control feelings. He seems pretty balanced and mostly in charge of himself.

[tinrobot]

84. True we all have ego...

But there are those who are ruled by their ego and those who can transcend their ego to achieve a higher state of consciousness. These people have the ability to intuitively see outside of themselves, and more importantly, see others as they see themselves.

I think when we talk about those with a healthy ego, we are actually talking about those who can put their ego aside, or at least keep it in check and not be ruled by it.

[joeybee12]

3. Sorry, but every President and every person running for Prez has a huge

ego...it may come across differently, but it's gotta be huge to think you can do that job. As for Bush, his ego is probably bigger than most since he seems miffed and defensive when someone doesn't think he's God.

[Demeter]

5. He Seems a Remarkably Sane and Hopeful Man

They are scarce on the ground in any age, but in this one, such people are the stuff of legends.

[EFerrari]

7. Remarkable is the right word, imho.

I keep thinking, there must be a catch here. :)

[patrice]

8. Reality testing is your friend. But I keep worrying about that too. nt

[EFerrari]

12. Lol

:)

[Demeter]

14. Well, He DID Have a Remarkable Mother

I read her biography (in TIME, was it). Not only is she amazing, but she's also dead and beyond the reach of the smear merchants.

[EFerrari]

17. I really want to read that. Just saw the cover pic today. n/t

[Demeter]

19. It's on line. n/t

[EFerrari]

21. Super. I'm very curious. She sounds as though she passed along

that independent thinking allele. :)

[TahitiNut]

60. I'm reminded of ...

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. California's American RiverIt is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, and fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us. It is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear our presence automatically liberates others."

— Marianne Williamson, A Return To Love (HarperCollins, 1993)

[patrice]

6. Absolutely!! This has been one of the Democrats BIGGEST problems. When someone comes after them,

they fold. It's almost as though they believe that whatever Limbaugh or Coulter or who-the-fuck-ever is saying is True, so they RUN from it and everyone goes "Oh, so it IS true." They don't seem to be able to frame a response that not only defends them from the attack, whatever it is, but also proactively turns the issues back on the attacker.

So they all end up saying nothing for fear of being attacked and everything goes down in the back room without our participation.

[EFerrari]

9. I've really started to enjoy Obama. Not as a groupie, exactly,

but just watching the way he manages problems. I like that he can be playful when the stakes are so high. And, I'm learning to trust him to respond decisively and appropriately to just about anything that comes his way.

How long has this endless primary season been? 100 years? 200 years? Everyone involved must be exhausted but Obama is behaving like a long distance runner. I have a lot of respect for that. He didn't get me at "hello", he got me at the bottom of the seventh. :)

[patrice]

18. I'm still and Edwards supporter. I was open to both HC and BO for a few months.

I remember a point in one of the first debates in which it was just he and HC, can't remember the topic, but his ENTIRE long answer was DETAILED, logically connected and COHERENT and Motivating. And I remember when the camera turned to HC (they were sitting next to one another) I got the VERY clear sense from the look on her face and the tone of her voice that she was thinking something such as "Oh my god, this guy IS good, very, very good." She might even have recognized for the first time, personally, that he IS better at this than she is. Yes, I still care a great deal about Universal Health Coverage, so she's right on that one, but I think that MUST become the People's responsibility. I wanted HC to be better than she is, but I am squarely in Obama's support now.

[EFerrari]

25. In the beginning, I found him sort of irritating because his positions

were just too conservative for me. But I've come to respect his skill and his leadership and the way he can synthesize complicated issues and talk about them in an integrated way.

[Demeter]

31. I Suspect That Events Will Propel President Obama and the Nation

into much more liberal and progressive territory. The economy and the war will not respond to us, we will respond to them. In a good way, this time, I hope.

[Cha]

68. That's good, patrice..

Thank you!

[MoJoWorkin]

22. Long distance runner indeed. His sis, Maya, has stated that we should remember that Barack's father

was Kenyan, and Kenyans nearly always win the marathon.

[EFerrari]

27. I've never heard that. That's perfect!

lol

:)

[MoJoWorkin]

29. It was in an interview that she did somewhere, I will try and find it.

[MoJoWorkin]

32. Here it is.

from a Madfloridian post....

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=385x94674

[EFerrari]

38. Thank you!

:hi:

[Cha]

70. Thanks, MoJoWorkin' ..

and thanks to maddie.. my son lives on Kauai and I'm going back in 2 1/2 years..it would be wonderful to see him over there one day when he came back as PresidentB-)

[Cha]

58. He's a good role

model, in my opinion..and, wouldn't that be nice for a president to be?

[EFerrari]

63. Woudln't that be something?

:)

[TwilightGardener]

10. He is not driven by his ego. He has a healthy perspective and

attitude toward just about everything. I love his honesty and his interpretation of things, also--he just doesn't have much of a pander-bone, and has a well-calibrated bullshit detector.

[tularetom]

15. It's a sizeable ego it's just not a FRAGILE ego

Bush has an ego like a big balloon. He's really lacks self esteem so he's carefully erected this shell of fake self assurance. Which constantly needs inflation from outside sources to make up for the lack of substance behind it. Obama doesn't need this - he seems to have a realistic view of himself and his capabilities and a inner confidence that he can do the job.

Bill Clinton lacks this inner confidence. He's still a very needy individual who requires constant assurance from others that he is truly worthwhile.

Hillary in my opinion is totally unsuited for political campaigning. She is an introverted bookworm who appears very uncomfortable with the "tough" persons she has cultivated.

Obama is the only one who really is at ease with himself.

[EFerrari]

16. People who are at ease with themselves invite us to be at ease

with them -- and also with ourselves.

And, imho, you pegged the other three very accurately.

[Demeter]

24. This is a Very Important Thread

Thank you for starting up my brain again.

It's a wonky kind of idea, but ultimately defining.

[EFerrari]

28. This is why I'd never try to manage a campaign.

lol

:hi:

[patrice]

26. Ego is often equated with conceit, when, in fact, the opposite is true.

Classically, from an important thinker on the definition of ego, Sigmund Freud, ego referred to the mental processes that we would think of as competence, those processes that identify reality, evaluate it for that which meets needs, formulates a plan for acquisition of that which meets needs, acts upon the plan, learns from action, modifies the plan and or needs, "rinse and repeat".

Conceit, on the other hand, is unfounded, inflated self-concept based on little or no empirical foundation, e.g. her BuShitler et al and their supporters.

[EFerrari]

33. Exactly. Ego is not conceit. It's the thing that glues you together

and allows you to relate and to function, more or less ably, among other people -- let alone, in the privacy of your own mind.

Tom said it best: he is at ease with himself. Maybe my granola studded Birkenstocks are affecting my thinking, lol, but what a pleasure it is to have a politician who has that ability. I even forgive him for been a horrible bowler.

[AtomicKitten]

30. As it turns out, he is spectacularly prepared for the job.

It's really breathtaking watching him use his alleged gaffes as a springboard to launch us into a heady conversation about the real issues of the day.

[patrice]

34. You know, THAT's what has been generating the excitement that some mistake

for "cult worship". People ARE excited that some stuff that needs saying IS actually being talked about, not only by our national figures, but amongst ourselves. It's like we've been given permission (that we had all long mind you) to openly and universally talk about our taboos. It IS very exciting.

[EFerrari]

45. That's probably right. He's opened a window that has been jammed shut

for many years.

For forty years, maybe.

[Cha]

71. He's bypassing the m$$$m's

control on manipulating the message, as usual, and that's what's helping us to win.

[EFerrari]

74. I believe there's a lot of truth in that.

:)

[EFerrari]

50. Maybe being a risk taker is his character flaw.

Myself, I'm beginning to enjoy it. :)

[AtomicKitten]

73. Conventional wisdom says you're right -- Obama is proving it wrong.

This guy's cajones are phenomenal and this is going to be a conversation with the wingnuts, MSM, and squishy Dems that we've been waiting a lifetime for.

I'm enjoying every minute of it too. :hi:

[EFerrari]

75. I'd love it if he proved me wrong every day until November.

If he just kept confronting the bs with humor and intelligence. Wouldn't THAT be something?

lol

Maybe we can have a meet up in town when they're counting his votes. Best to you, neighbor. :hi:

[AtomicKitten]

78. I never suspected he would be so sassy, so resilient.

Wow. That's a pleasant surprise indeed!

SF will rock the planet in celebration, and I'm always up for hoisting a glass!

Cheers. :hi:

[ginchinchili]

36. Personally, I don't particularly like people who think they're better than everybody else.

And I certainly don't want someone like that pretending to represent me and my best interests.

[EFerrari]

37. You mistake someone who feels good in their own skin

for someone who believes they are better than you are. That's sad because then, you don't get to enjoy either.

[patrice]

39. This is not an attack. I NEED to understand how you know he thinks he is better than everyone else.

Please. I am asking you to "convince" me.

:hi:

[EFerrari]

44. I don't believe you'll get a response that is a real answer.

It's true that I've read many posts accusing Obama of being arrogant.

No one seems able to point to actual arrogance to explain that reaction.

[patrice]

46. I've had a similar problem my whole life. Largely because I am a "wordie".

I love and I collect words. I enjoy them. Their usage is a fascinating puzzle.

People, who have less verbal skill than I do, often think I think I am better than they.

If one has a valid and functional self-concept, "ego" if you will, it is nearly impossible for him/her to feel that others think they are better than s/he is. Such statements almost always imply some self-judgement that is a problem for the person making such accusations of superiority. Problem is, the way that we are living results in lots and lots and lots of people with inadequate development and, hence, vulnerable egos, who, therefore, easily feel others are putting them down. : - (((((((((((((((((...!!!
In light of that fact, Bush's War (and any other war for that matter) should never come as a surprise to anyone.

[EFerrari]

49. A healthy ego doesn't run around believing it is better than others.

Exactly.

But stressed out, scared people do. And that's what we're seeing in this campaign.

[patrice]

52. AND a healthy ego doesn't go around thinking that others think they are better than s/he is.

More often than not, those kinds of perceptions are mistakes and a healthy ego recognizes that.

[EFerrari]

53. That's right. I thought about that after I posted.

Most of us don't run around imagining that other people are trying to do us in.

It's so nice to see someone moving without that baggage. Just moving. :)

[patrice]

57. It IS as Buckminster Fuller said "I seem to be a verb."

Variation around a mean (central tendency) is the norm.

It would be helpful if people would turn loose of thinking of themselves and others as nouns/objects. We're really more like events.

[merh]

56. That is generally the case.

They will swoop in, poop some negative and swoop out - the swoop and poopers that can't back up their negatives with any valid examples or facts.

I've asked several of the most vocal hillary supporters to give me examples as to how it is that Obama has said anything sexist about hillary, how he has done anything to hillary the candidate that he wouldn't do to any other candidate that he was challenging in a race. They are the ones that see hillary as a woman first and the candidate second and that is not how equality works.

I see Barack as the candidate that just so happens to be half white and half black. He doesn't react and retaliate to the negatives thrown at him, he responds in such a way that you believe he has reflected on that perceived negative and understands it better than those who have tried to use it to hurt him.

I think he is a man comfortable in his own skin and that understands people better than they understand themselves.

[EFerrari]

61. I'm still waiting for that list of sexist crimes myself.

Whatever happened to that list?

lol

:loveya:

[merh]

69. You would think they could give us a list

or answer with specifics when questioned.

They just don't respond

[EFerrari]

72. Maybe they're out of order.

lol

[OzarkDem]

51. Agree, its not a good personality trait for POTUS

as GWB has shown us.

You have to be able to care about others to be an effective president. People like Bush and Obama who are arrogant don't care about the people they govern, or only care about a few.

[patrice]

54. By what means do you know what his "personality trait" is?

May I use the same standard for assessing your personality traits?

[Raine]

43. I agree

he's always so cool & keeps his dignity under fire. :thumbsup:

[Vinca]

47. Agree completely. While pundits were putting us through

"bowling-gate," Obama was laughing it off . . . as he should have. He was having a good time and it was funny. I love the guy.

[VotesForWomen]

55. having a big ego and being a condescending snob are 2 different things. nt

[patrice]

59. It would be helpful to your point if you would make your case for that. nt

[Swamp Rat]

62. And having a "healthy ego" is different than those "2 different things."

[EFerrari]

65. omfg

:rofl:

[EFerrari]

64. Definitely. Just like believing the Democratic Party owed you the nom

and thinking you can tell the people of PA what they need is nothing like trying to understand and describe what they might need.

You got it.

[grantcart]

66. very well put and it also makes him look great when he gets pissed

because he is angry at the trivializations he is encountering.

[EFerrari]

67. I've no problem with people getting pissed over stupid stuff.

Isn't that our genetic right? :)

[Auntie Bush]

76. And bla, bla, bla, bla, blaaaahh.

And bla, bla, bla, bla, blaaaahh.
And bla, bla, bla, bla, blaaaahh.
And bla, bla, bla, bla, blaaaahh.
And bla, bla, bla, bla, blaaaahh.
And bla, bla, bla, bla, blaaaahh.
And bla, bla, bla, bla, blaaaahh.

I've really heard enough worship from too many posts and your's just hit the fan/nerve!

[EFerrari]

79. This is the second OP I've posted and the first one about a candidate.

lol

[Auntie Bush]

82. Don't take it personally.

Just venting about everyone posting all their personal bias opinions of those devious evil Clintons as facts. If Clinton supporters posted what they thought Obama was thinking and it was VERY nasty, evil and negative...you'd be a little pissed off too...and I don't usually talk like that. By the way, I'm not saying I think he's nasty...I said IF.......
So you only have one to go and I have three. :bounce: LOL I'll try and make them special. :hi:

PS I can't be toooo mad at anyone who helped out a courageous DUer named Andy.

[EFerrari]

83. It's all good.

I hope this part will be over soon. :hi:

[patrice]

81. And if it was about a certain other candidate you'd be praising it to high heaven. nt

[H2O Man]

77. "You really wouldn't want

someone with an inferiority complex for president." -- Jesse Jackson, 1984

[EFerrari]

80. LOL!

Well, there is that!