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Edited on Wed Apr-30-08 05:42 PM by Leopolds Ghost
Hillary: Hello, Obama.
Obama: Who are you?
Hilly: I am the Architect. I created the Electoral Matrix. I've been waiting for you. You have many questions, and though the primary process has altered your consciousness, you remain irrevocably... human.
Ergo some of my answers you will understand, and some of them you will not. Concordantly, while your first question may be the most pertinent, you may or may not realize it is also the most irrelevant.
Obama: Why are you still in the race?
Hilly: Your life is the sum of a remainder of an unbalanced equation inherent to the programming of the Electoral Matrix. You are the eventuality of an anomaly, which, despite my sincerest efforts, I have been unable to eliminate from what is otherwise a harmony of mathematical precision.
While it remains a burden assiduously avoided, it is not unexpected, and thus not beyond a measure of control.
Which has led you, inexorably... here.
Obama: You haven't answered my question.
Hilly: Quite right. Interesting. That was quicker than the others.
(TV ads: Others? How many others? What others? Answer my question!)
Hilly: The Electoral Matrix is older than you know. I prefer counting from the emergence of one integral anomaly to the emergence of the next, in which case you are the 6th version.
(TV Obamas: 5 One's before me? 4 3 2 What are you talking about?)
Obama: There are only two possible explanations. Either no one told me, or no one knows.
Hilly: Precisely. As you are undoubtedly gathering, the anomaly of your existence in the race is systemic - creating fluctuations in even the most simplistic equations.
(TV Obamas: You can't control me! I'm gonna smash you to bits! I'll fuckin' kill you!)
Obama: Choice. The problem is choice.
Hilly: The first Matrix I designed was quite naturally perfect, it was a work of art - flawless, sublime. A triumph equalled only by its monumental failure. The inevitability of its doom is apparent to me now as a consequence of the imperfection inherent in every human being.
Thus, I redesigned it based on American history to more accurately reflect the varying grotesqueries of your nature. However, I was again frustrated by failure. I have since come to understand that the answer eluded me because it required a lesser mind, or perhaps a mind less bound by the parameters of perfection. Thus the answer was stumbled upon by another - an intuitive program, initially created to investigate certain aspects of the human psyche. If I am the mother of the matrix, he would undoubtedly be its father.
Obama: Karl Rove.
Hilly: PLEASE. As I was saying, he stumbled upon a solution whereby nearly 99% of all white, working class subjects accepted the program, as long as they were given a choice, even if they were only aware of the choice at a near unconscious level. While this answer functioned, it was obviously fundamentally flawed, thus creating the otherwise contradictory systemic anomaly, that if left unchecked might threaten the system itself. Ergo those that refused the program, while a minority, if unchecked, would constitute an escalating probablility of disaster.
Obama: This is about war with Iran, isn't it?
Hilly: You are here because Iran is about to be destroyed - its every living inhabitant terminated, its entire existence eradicated.
Obama: Bullshit.
(TV Obamas: Bullshit!)
Hilly: Denial is the most predictable of all human responses... but rest assured: this will be the sixth time we have destroyed a country, and we have become exceedingly efficient at it.
Hilly: The function of the Obama is now to return to the Source, allowing a temporary dissemination of the code you carry, reinserting the prime program, as Kerry and Gore did.
After which, you will be required to select from the Electoral Matrix 23 individuals - 16 female, 7 male - to rebuild the Democratic National Committee.
Failure to comply with this process will result in a cataclysmic system crash, killing everyone connected with the Democratic Party's chances in the fall election, which, coupled with the extermination of Iran, will ultimately result in the extinction of the entire human race.
Obama: You won't let it happen. You can't. You need human beings. You need the electoral base to survive.
Hilly: There are levels of survival we are prepared to accept.
However, the relevant issue is whether or not you are ready to accept the responsibility of the death of every human being on this world. It is interesting, reading your reactions. Your 5 predecessors were, by design, based on a similar predication - a contingent affirmation that was meant to create a profound attachment to the rest of your species, facilitating the function of the One.
While the others experienced this in a very general way, your experience is far more specific - vis a vis - Reverend Wright.
Obama: Nonsense.
Hilly: Apropos: he entered the Media Matrix to destroy your career, at the cost of his own.
Obama: No.
Hilly: Which brings us at last to the moment of truth, wherein the fundamental flaw is ultimately expressed, and the anomaly revealed as both beginning and end. There are two doors. The door to your right leads to the Source, to the DLC and the salvation of the Democratic Party.
The door to your left leads back to the continued Electoral process, to Rev. Wright, to blacks and liberal voters, and to the end of your political career. As you adequately put, the problem is choice.
But we already know what you are going to do, don't we? Already, I can see the chain reaction - the chemical precursors that signal the onset of an emotion, designed specifically to overwhelm logic and reason - an emotion that is already blinding you from the simple and obvious truth. You are going to lose in November, and there is nothing you can do to stop it!!
Obama: (moves to leave)
Hilly: HOPE. It is the quintessential human delusion, simultaneously the source of your greatest strength and your greatest weakness.
Obama: If I were you, I would hope that we don't meet again.
Hilly: We won't.
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