Hillary Announces she will be Facing off Against Uncommitted in October's General Election

[Bjorn Against]

(Washington) – The Clinton Campaign announced today that the Hillary will be facing off against her opponent Uncommitted in October's general election. While elections are usually held in November Clinton says that the election needed to be moved up in order to give the hard working white people of America the chance to have a greater say in choosing their next President.

Federal officials claim that the rules clearly state that in order for the election to be valid it must be held in November and they have refused to accept the electoral votes of any state who decides to hold their election early. A spokesperson for the Clinton campaign has said that while they agree with federal officials that the votes cast in October's election will not count “People should vote anyways because we may change our minds and decide that the rules should be changed after the election has taken place”.

Clinton's rivals Barack Obama and John McCain have said that their names will not be appearing on October's ballots. McCain removed his name from the ballot after a friend of his who works as a lobbyist for voting machine manufacturer Diebold assured him that he could win even if his name was not on the ballot.

Obama on the other hand is not in the October race to win because he insists on following election laws. “The only legitimate election is the one that occurs in November, and this campaign is moving towards a November victory.”

The Clinton campaign immediately denounced Obama's comments as an attempt to disenfranchise all the people who show up to cast their votes in October. “We are tired of this negative campaigning from Barack Hussein Osama. He needs to put on a flag pin, stop going to black churches, and stop these divisive attacks. He is never going to win over hard working white people if he keeps going negative, but that bitter elitist and his misogynistic cult just seem incapable of running a positive campaign like we have”.

Clinton officials said that despite Obama's insistence on following the rules that they would move forward and pretend that the results of the October election don't count until Hillary succeeds in her battle against Uncommitted and the rules can be changed to accommodate her victory.

[reflection]

1. "Don't blame me,"

"I voted Uncommitted."

[Bjorn Against]

6. And the Hillary campaign would like you to know...

That uncommitted vote of yours will be given to Hillary, because as Harold Ickes says uncommitted electors can vote for anyone they like.

[reflection]

11. Sounds like airtight logic! :)

[Yael]

2. LOL!

Well done!

[bilgewaterbill]

3. Is that a fair reflection?

[Muttocracy]

4. :-)

[Thickasabrick]

5. LOL....k&R

[roguevalley]

7. Don't worry. I hear Puerto Rico will put her over the top. No, wait ...

[suston96]

8. Funny thing is that millions of people will be voting in October and earlier under.....

....you guessed it - early voting laws in most states.

[billyoc]

9. Shame on you Uncommitted! Meet me in Westchester for A REAL DEBATE!!

:rofl:

[Clintonista2]

10. Poorly written

:boring:

[Bjorn Against]

12. Thank you for your very well written two words, I can tell you put a lot of thought into them