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What this election means to me, as a 50-year-old white woman...

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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 01:31 PM
Original message
What this election means to me, as a 50-year-old white woman...
I grew up in about as stereotypical a Midwestern white middle class household as one can imagine. My dad worked, and my mom was a full-time stay-home mom, as were most of the moms of my friends, with a few schoolteachers and nurses as exceptions here and there. We were not rich, but we were very comfortable. We had everything we needed, and much of what we wanted. We knew our neighbors, not just next door, but for blocks in any direction. Any kid with a scraped knee could knock on any door around and find a mom with a bandaid, a mom who knew your name and knew your parents and with whose kids you played and went to birthday parties (in those days, with the little girls wearing white gloves and party dresses, and the boys in dress pants and bow ties, believe it or not...)
With the exception of a few college students from other nations, and ONE black family who had emigrated from what was then Rhodesia, it was a totally white community.
Daddy was a Lutheran minister, and at that time, a campus pastor at a small church college. I was fortunate to have some exposure to those foreign students, when my parents hosted dinner parties: from Jordan, from Tanzania, from what was then Formosa...and to that black family, who lived just down the block and who were members of our church. I went to school with the three children, and my parents and theirs became good friends.
I remember in those days seeing images on television of the strife in the south, of Bull Connor and the police dogs and the fire hoses. I could not feel the sting of the streams of water, nor the hot breath of the dogs, nor the nip of their sharp teeth. But I could see the fear in the faces of those being targeted by that vicious and evil form of domestic terrorism. I could see the hatred in the eyes of the dog handlers. I could hear the screams of the victims. And it made me terrified too. I could not understand how such things could happen in MY COUNTRY. I remember being in Georgia with my family, when I was about ten years old. We were in a shopping center in Atlanta, and had stopped to rest on some benches in an area near some restrooms. I went to use the restroom, and as I came out, there was a little black girl standing near the water fountain between the men's and the women's restrooms. She was perhaps two or three years younger than I. She called me "Ma'am." She asked if she could get a drink at the fountain. I thought she was too little to reach it, so, as kids do, I hoisted her 'round the middle and boosted her up to get a drink. She shyly thanked me, and called me "Ma'am" again. When I got back to the bench where my parents were sitting, my dad had the oddest look on his face, as though he were about to cry. He asked me about the exchange with the little girl, and I explained that she needed a drink and couldn't reach the fountain. He in turn explained that she was probably just as capable as I of reaching the fountain, and that she was really asking if she were ALLOWED to drink from it. It hit me all at once: this was connected to those damn dogs and those damn fire hoses, and to the hatred, and to the fear. And I understood that this beautiful little girl, only a couple of years younger than I, had called me "Ma'am" simply because I was white.
My dad was very active in the civil rights movement, and did some work with Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. I did not remember the extent of that involvement, having been only two or three myself, when dad invited Dr. King to be the keynote speaker/preacher at a national gathering of Lutheran youth in Miami, Florida, in 1962. It was years before I understood how much Dad had stuck his neck out, as the then-director of the ALC (American Lutheran Church) Youth Office in Minneapolis, to extend that invitation. But as I got older, and as we went to marches and rallies, and as we continued to do so after Dr. King's assassination, I began to get a wonderful and solid sense of my dad's stance on issues of civil rights and social justice. And I clearly understood his work in the context of Christian community: we were against war BECAUSE we were Christian. We were in favor of equal rights under the law BECAUSE we were Christian. And our fellow church members, and my dad's colleagues at the college, were involved in the same efforts for the same reason.
Yesterday morning, at 7:00 am, when I entered my polling place to cast my ballot, I was voting for my dad as well as for myself. He didn't live to see this day, but he would be SO PROUD. And last night, as I was alone at home, watching the election coverage, and texting updates to my husband and my daughter, who were together in Minneapolis (at the Bob Dylan concert!), I was thinking of him, and of how far we have come as a nation. As I watched the celebrations across the country and across the globe, I thought back to those horrendous images of the dogs and the hoses and the hatred. And then I watched the contrasting images I was seeing on my screen on this historic night. I was not in Grant Park, but I could see the elation and pride and hope on the faces of those who were there: black and white and Asian, young and old. I could hear the shouts of joy! I could feel the winds of change, from my distant lonely living room Minnesota, and I was proud, so proud...This one's for you, Daddy...and for Dr. Martin, and for Schwerner, Goodman and Cheney, for Medgar Evers and Rosa Parks and Robert F. Kennedy...and for my kids and my grandkids...for our nation and our planet.
We've come a long way, and we have yet a long way to travel. But we are traveling TOGETHER. And we have hope. And we will get there.
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GreenPartyVoter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 01:32 PM
Response to Original message
1. Thanks for sharing this *hug*
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 01:51 PM
Response to Reply #1
3. You're welcome...it's been pretty overwhelming! What a night...
what a country! :hug:
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watrwefitinfor Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 01:50 PM
Response to Original message
2. Thank you, grannylib.
As a daughter of the (white) south with memories of the times you speak of, this day has so much meaning for me, too. I'm sure your dad is smiling down.

Wat
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 01:52 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. You're welcome... thanks for the response...it is amazing, isn't it??
And I know he is! I can feel that too :hug:
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lizziegrace Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 02:09 PM
Response to Original message
5. Words fail me
:hug:

This election was about so much more than electing a president.
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 02:15 PM
Response to Reply #5
6. It was indeed! I'm so happy today...so happy!
:hug:
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Mabus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 02:16 PM
Response to Original message
7. Oh grannylib, now you've got me blubbering
Just as I was getting ready to do something productive you have me reduced to crying heap.
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 02:36 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. I'm sorry! It's just...I can't explain, but I needed to tell this story...
I miss my dad so much. And my daughter, who didn't live long enough to ever vote in a presidential election. And I wrote it to honor the future for my youngest daughter, who just voted in her first presidential election!
:hug:
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Mabus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 08:09 PM
Response to Reply #8
26. The reason I was crying is
I could have been that little girl. I'm biracial. I grew up in OKC during the 60's and there were a lot of times when I didn't feel welcome every where. I can't tell you how many birthday parties I got invited to by classmates only to be turned away at the door because I wasn't the same color. Other kids treated me like a kid and their parents were different. Your story reminded me of a few times in my life, when I was a kid, when I was treated with kindness by complete strangers who saw me as a fellow human being and not something less than human.

:hug:
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 08:14 PM
Response to Reply #26
28. Oh Mabus...thanks for sharing that...I'm so sorry that was your experience
I was just looking at pix from my youngest daughter's 6th birthday party - two little white blondes, she being one of them, one Asian American girl, and three African American kids - two boys and one girl. I love those pictures.
I hope we all learn to treat EVERYONE as fellow humans!! :hug:
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Mabus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 08:24 PM
Response to Reply #28
31. I had a great mom
She helped us (me and my siblings) understand that we weren't the ones with a problem. I was so lucky because that type of treatment taught me compassion instead of hate. It also gave me some pretty thick skin and the desire to listen to people and treat them fairly.
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LaurenG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 02:58 PM
Response to Original message
9. Thanks for the story!
I don't know if I'll be able to stop getting teary eyed for awhile.
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:18 PM
Response to Reply #9
12. Me too...it's been a teary 24 hours! But all good...it's all good!!
:hug:
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ladyVet Donating Member (279 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 03:33 PM
Response to Original message
10. Thank you for sharing this.
I am also a 50-year-old white woman, a daughter of the South, feeling the sea of history wash over me.

Oddly enough, I also have a memory of a young black girl at a water fountain. I was about six, waiting with my father and younger siblings at a courtyard in a little strip mall in Burlington, NC. There was a simple fountain at the center of that cool waiting place, and a black man around my father's age took this little girl by the shoulder and softly told her she could get some water later. I asked my daddy why she couldn't drink from the fountain, and he said it was against the law. I just couldn't understand why somebody made a law that kept a little girl from having some water on a hot summer day.

I'm grateful that my children grew up in a different world, and their future children will someday look back on these moments and wonder what all the fuss was about.
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:19 PM
Response to Reply #10
13. You're welcome, and thanks for sharing your memories as well.
Amazing to think of the changes we've seen in our 50 years...
What a great night!
:hug:
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Psyop Samurai Donating Member (873 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 05:49 PM
Response to Original message
11. Big hug, grannylib, from a 51yo white man...
I can't summon much more just now, but I hear every word.

:hug:
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:20 PM
Response to Reply #11
14. Thank you, and right back to you!
:hug:
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H2O Man Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:22 PM
Response to Original message
15. Beautiful!
Thank you.

Nominated.
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:26 PM
Response to Reply #15
16. Thanks for taking the time to read it...I just can't stop thinking about
the changes over the course of my lifetime...
What a night!
What and election!
:hug:
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Frosty1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:39 PM
Response to Original message
17. Well said grannylib
:kick:
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:45 PM
Response to Reply #17
18. Thanks for taking the time to read it...I just can't stop thinking about it
:hug:
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Shardik Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:46 PM
Response to Original message
19. Recommended.
Thank you, GrannyLib. There are many of us out here that have lived through similar experiences.

I am in awe of what happened yesterday and have so much new hope for our future.

Thank you again.
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:49 PM
Response to Reply #19
21. Thank you for taking the time to read it....I'm in awe too...what a NIGHT!!
What an election!!!
:hug:
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Colobo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:47 PM
Response to Original message
20. Beautiful post.
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:50 PM
Response to Reply #20
22. Thank you...I'm just over the moon about this election!
What a night...
:hug:
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trof Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:54 PM
Response to Original message
23. Oh, lady. Oh, lordy. You made me cry again.
I'm doing that a lot lately.
Tears of joy and relief.
Just finally relief.

I'm 67 and grew up in Birmingham in the 40s and 50s.
I remember the church and home bombings.
And Bull Connor and the dogs and fire hoses.

I've come a long, long way since then.
And our country has too.
We still have a way to go.
It ain't over.

But now I too have hope.
Bless you.

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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 08:12 PM
Response to Reply #23
27. Me too! Thanks for taking the time to read this...I just can't stop
thinking about it...
:hug:
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FrenchieCat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:56 PM
Response to Original message
24. Waterworks are turned on once again......
:cry:
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 08:14 PM
Response to Reply #24
29. Awww, Frenchie...thanks so much for reading it...
:hug:
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hedgehog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 07:59 PM
Response to Original message
25. I've wanted to yell at some of the well meaning commentators today
talking about what a great day this is for black Americans. True, they have special pride of ownership just as my family did when Cousin Jack was elected back in 1960, but today is a great day for ALL Americans!
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 08:15 PM
Response to Reply #25
30. Amen! Amen! It's not just our African American brothers and sisters
for whom we should be happy and proud...I am OVER THE MOON with pride and happiness at what we have done, together...for good...
:hug:
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rexy Donating Member (181 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 08:30 PM
Response to Original message
32. Beautiful! Thanks for sharing. nt
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 08:42 PM
Response to Reply #32
33. Thanks for taking the time to read it!
:hug:
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politicasista Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 08:45 PM
Response to Original message
34. Kick
Great story! :kick:


And yes, we will get there. :patriot:
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-05-08 09:41 PM
Response to Reply #34
35. Thank you! I just can't stop thinking about it.
:hug:
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politicasista Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Nov-06-08 01:34 PM
Response to Reply #35
36. I know what you mean
I re-watched Obama's victory speech last night and the Yes We Can video after his victory speech, election night and both times, I was in tears.

I can't believe this is really happening but it is. :)


:hug: :hi:
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Nov-06-08 11:31 PM
Response to Reply #36
37. It's amazing...just amazing. Say, do you happen to have a link or
know where I can find the picture of him touching the flag as he was leaving the stage at Grant Park?
I missed that moment (I was probably still bawling!) and I'd love to see it...
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ihavenobias Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Nov-07-08 06:29 PM
Response to Original message
38. K & R, great perspective! n/t
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