A republican, a Green Party member, and a Democrat are using the bathroom

[charlie and algernon]

After they're done with their business, the republican washes his hands and takes gobs and gobs of paper towels to dry every inch of his hands. The Green Party Member washes his hands and takes exactly one piece of paper towel and meticulously dries his hands. The Democrat finishes up and walks past the sink and the Republican and the greenie look at him funny, which prompts the Democrat to say "Democrats don't pee on our hands."

[unpossibles]

1. I wash my hands regardless

My version:

a Republican, a Green, a Libertarian, and a Democrat walk into the bathroom.

The Republican shits on the floor and wipes it all over the walls, throwing it on the mirror and at the Democrat. The Libertarian pretends to not notice. The Democrat cleans up the mess (again).

The Green says we're all the same instead of helping.

[slampoet]

2. And both of these are why the joke is originally not political.

Both y'all bombed